Your favorite type of post-er on HBT:

[zefbrew]

The poster that asks for advice and never replies or provides feedback after saying something along the lines of "OK i'm going to try this when I get home tonight, thanks!"

 

[hunter_le five]

I love grammar and spelling Nazis. They contribute so much to threads.

Aw, c'mon, you could've at least had the courtesy to throw in a misspelled word or too into that poast.

The poster that asks for advice and never replies or provides feedback after saying something along the lines of "OK i'm going to try this when I get home tonight, thanks!"

The poster that asks for advice, but then proceeds to argue with everyone who offers up feedback, because they've already made up their mind when they posted the OP.

 

[WildGingerBrewing]

Ugh! These guys who read the first post of a thread, immediately skip past the 50 posts of conversation, give advice that has already been concluded, at around post 8, isn't the issue.

bwahahaha

How about the people who post on some of the popular recipe threads.

There are a lot of good recipes on this site, and I've tried many of them. When I do the beer, I tend to stick to the recipe.

I love the posters who go on the recipe thread raving about how good the recipe is, but then mention that they used a different yeast, different hops, a completely different grain bill, and added some weird extra ingredient (like dandilions).

I don't know, but from where I sit, you didn't make the beer in the recipe.

Or the other types:

"I substituted the Fuggles for citra, used high gravity distilling yeast instead of S-04, dry hopped with cascade even though the recipe doesn't call for dry hopping, added 6lbs of sugar to up the ABV, and 32oz of chocolate malt because I had some leftover from another recipe that I didn't want to throw away. I then force carbed it by cranking it up to 72psi @ 33 degrees for a week and a half. The beer tastes awful. And it's super foamy for some reason, probably because the OP called for using MO as the base malt instead of GP, what a dummy. This recipe sucks, and whoever posted it should feel bad about themselves. I have no idea why everyone on HBT raves about this recipe so much."

Both of these! It's the one that really rubs me the wrong way. "I changed everything about your recipe and it came out weird. Maybe you should try this, this and this to make it better". Screw you! Brew it the way it was written and it will be great. ********.

Aw, c'mon, you could've at least had the courtesy to throw in a misspelled word or too into that poast.

The poster that asks for advice, but then proceeds to argue with everyone who offers up feedback, because they've already made up their mind when they posted the OP.

And this too.

 

[drainbamage]

The "I'm ready to start brewing my own recipes...now somebody write my recipe for me" Poster.

The BMC Apologist: "You say it sucks because you don't appreciate the consistency. Let's see you brew millions of barrels of beer and sell it worldwide, smart guy."

 

[b-boy]

The poster that asks for advice, but then proceeds to argue with everyone who offers up feedback, because they've already made up their mind when they posted the OP.

I work with a guy like this. He's incapable of making any decision without getting everyone's feedback. But - if your feedback doesn't match what he wants to hear, he gets argumentative. He'll keep arguing until you agree with him. It drives me nuts.

First - Why can't you just make a decision on your own? Second - Why are you asking me, if you've already made up your mind?

 

[motobrewer]

guys, you don't get.

you're mashing.....INSIDE the boil kettle. when you're done you just lift the bag out.

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Innocent poster: Hey guys, I just overheard a funny thing about beer. Here's my story that might give some of you a cheap laugh and brighten your day!

WellActuallyTroll: Well actually, I can cite dozens of articles showing why what you claimed as false is actually true 3% of the time. I can cite dozens more that clearly state you are nothing short of a giant ******. I award you no points, and my god have mercy on your soul.

 

[b-boy]

guys, you don't get.

You're mashing.....inside the boil kettle. When you're done you just lift the giant pillow case out.

ftfy

 

[LandoLincoln]

I love grammar and spelling Nazis. They contribute so much to threads.

Small thinking. We're not here to contribute to threads. We're here to contribute to society as a whole.

 

[Zekk]

Most of my favorites have been stated already. But I think my all time favorite is the poster who tells everyone to add 4+ oz whirlpool hops and dry hops to EVERYTHING. Someone posts a recipe for critique and its a simple brown ale with like 2 oz hops. Next poster says "Add 1/2 lb hops because I like hoppy beer and you should too!"

 

[1977Brewer]

Small thinking. We're not hear to contribute to threads. We're here to contribute to society as a hole.

Ftfy

 

[JonM]

At the risk of derailing things, I'll say it: I rather dislike threads about "Some no-good dirty scumbag rat-fink SOLD OUT TO THE MAN!!!! How dare that successful businessman build a brand and then sell it for a profit! For shame! SHAME I say!!!"

 

[iijakii]

Most of my favorites have been stated already. But I think my all time favorite is the poster who tells everyone to add 4+ oz whirlpool hops and dry hops to EVERYTHING. Someone posts a recipe for critique and its a simple brown ale with like 2 oz hops. Next poster says "Add 1/2 lb hops because I like hoppy beer and you should too!"

How else will you get a good critique without citrus hopstands?

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

At the risk of derailing things, I'll say it: I rather dislike threads about "Some no-good dirty scumbag rat-fink SOLD OUT TO THE MAN!!!! How dare that successful businessman build a brand and then sell it for a profit! For shame! SHAME I say!!!"

Yeah! **** HJ Heinze and the tomato truck he rolled in on! ******* sell out!

 

[joshesmusica]

Most of my favorites have been stated already. But I think my all time favorite is the poster who tells everyone to add 4+ oz whirlpool hops and dry hops to EVERYTHING. Someone posts a recipe for critique and its a simple brown ale with like 2 oz hops. Next poster says "Add 1/2 lb hops because I like hoppy beer and you should too!"

Are you the hopstand hater who created that thread?

 

[m00ps]

LOL. Its more like someone posts a recipe for a critique and their only comment on their current recipe is " I wish it had more hop character" or 'the hops just dont pop".

Well.....?

 

[brettwasbtd]

DIY threads where the OP disappears and then once every few months to a year someone bumps the thread for progress...the suspense kills me

I hate all you who post in the giveaway threads...those gifts are for ME... Y'all keep making me miss out!

 

[iijakii]

Recipe advice for a SMASH.

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

Recipe advice for a SMASH.

and then wants everything in metric!

 

[wobrien]

Posters that use plural pronouns.

When we brew stouts...
Our mash tun holds...

Do they sit next to each other at the computer and alternate key strokes?

 

[m00ps]

Posters that use plural pronouns.

When we brew stouts...
Our mash tun holds...

Do they sit next to each other at the computer and alternate key strokes?

Im assuming these guys brew in club meetings but it still gets me.

These guys tend to be the ones that already have a "house yeast" and a "house pale ale?" and a name/logo for their brewing "company" Really? You're less than 20 gallons into this thing....

 

[iijakii]

Im assuming these guys brew in club meetings but it still gets me.

These guys tend to be the ones that already have a "house yeast" and a "house pale ale?" and a name/logo for their brewing "company" Really? You're less than 20 gallons into this thing....

First batch! Help me design my logo and labels.

 

[MaxStout]

The posters who fail to understand this:

anecdote /= data​

It usually goes like "You can't do A, B and C. You have to do X, Y and Z. That always works for me"

 

[DromJohn]

I hate all you who post in the giveaway threads...those gifts are for ME... Y'all keep making me miss out!

Get over yourself. Your luck will even out. We post in the giveaway threads to keep Creamy Goodness from winning.

 

[b-boy]

I really hate the posters who post pictures of $50k bar in their basements - complete with English beer engines and personalized mirrors behind the bar. Most of their bars are bigger than my basement.

Oh Wait...that's just envy. I get those emotions mixed up a lot.

Never mind.

 

[Cyclman]

I'm that guy.

My least favorite poster is the arrogant one who states with absolute authority that if I don't follow his way I can't possibly be brewing good beer.

We all know:

 

[iijakii]

I'm that guy.

My least favorite poster is the arrogant one who states with absolute authority that if I don't follow his way I can't possibly be brewing good beer. Second to that is the Junior Chemist/Biologist.

In 1633 Galileo was found guilty of heresy for defying the "conventional wisdom" and pointing out that regardless of what the authority said, his observations showed that the earth revolved around the sun.

"It's absolutely impossible to brew good beer without strict temperature control"

Yeah? Who am I supposed to believe, you, or my lying taste buds?

I brew for fun, and for tasty beer. That's why I consider this a hobby.

IDK. I definitely agree that it's hard to mess up beers in most way -- but I've tasted enough of other peoples' ****ty bubblegum beer for a few lifetimes. If you're fermenting without temperature control then I want no part of it. Probably the one area of brewing that's a requirement in my opinion.

Note that temperature control doesn't have to be a full-blown fridge STC unit. You can get by with sonofachambers, ice/water baths, cold basements etc. But people fermenting at roomtemp? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiit

 

[banesong]

IDK. I definitely agree that it's hard to mess up beers in most way -- but I've tasted enough of other peoples' ****ty bubblegum beer for a few lifetimes. If you're fermenting without temperature control then I want no part of it. Probably the one area of brewing that's a requirement in my opinion.

Note that temperature control doesn't have to be a full-blown fridge STC unit. You can get by with sonofachambers, ice/water baths, cold basements etc. But people fermenting at roomtemp? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiit

... I can ferment very clean beers at room temp. The key is that I only brew what will fit the current ambient in my basement. If it is summer, then I make a saison. Winter, I can not quite lager, but ferment an ale very cool. Room temp is a relative term.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

... I can ferment very clean beers at room temp. The key is that I only brew what will fit the current ambient in my basement. If it is summer, then I make a saison. Winter, I can not quite lager, but ferment an ale very cool. Room temp is a relative term.

fact. our basement room temp is quite cooler than our main floor which is slightly cooler than our upstairs. and the room where I keep my wine and bottled beers is cooler than the rest of the basement.

 

[Zuljin]

... I can ferment very clean beers at room temp. The key is that i only brew what will fit the current ambient in my basement. If it is summer, then i make a saison. Winter, i can not quite lager, but ferment an ale very cool. Room temp is a relative term.

74f