Guy and his dog walk into a bar.
Bartender says that dogs aren't allowed.
Guy says, "But this just isn't any old dog. This dog is special- he can talk!"
Bartender is of course skeptical but kinda amused, so he says, "Tell you what- if that dog can talk, y'all can stay. If he can't, I'm gonna beat you up and toss you both into the dumpster."
Guy agrees, looks at his dog and says, "Hey dog, how does a tree feel?"
Dog goes "Ruff!"
Guy says, "Hear that? I told you my dog could talk. He said that a tree feels rough."
Guy can see that the bartender isn't impressed, so he says, "I'll prove it again. Hey dog, what's on top of a house?"
Dog goes "Ruff!"
Guy says, "See, he did it again. He said that a house has a roof on top."
Bartender is getting annoyed, so the guy asks for one last chance. Guy says, "Hey dog, who's the greatest Yankee of all time?"
Dog goes "Ruff!"
Guy says, "See? He really can talk. He said that Babe Ruth is the greatest Yankee of all time."
Now the bartender has had enough, so he beats up the guy, grabs 'em both and tosses them into the dumpster.
In the dumpster the guy and his dog emerge covered in garbage. The guy leers and curses at the dog, who says, "What?! Should I have said Joe DiMaggio?"