Movie quotes: keep it going

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I had to pull this one back up.


"Do you know what nemesis means?
A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified, in this case, by me......a watery c*nt"
- Snatch
 
"Now listen up, you primitive screwheads. See this? This... is my boomstick! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. YOU GOT THAT?"

- Army of Darkness :D :rockin:
 
Tucker " Whats are they doing?"
Church "What?"
Tucker " I said, what are they doing now?"
Church" God Da*n, I am getting so sick of answering that question!"
Tucker "Dont yell at me, you got the fukin sniper rifle and I am not gonna just sit here anplay with my dik"
Church " OK, OK, they're just standing there and talking, thats what they were doing last week, thats what they were doing 5 minutes ago......so 5 minutes from now when you ask me "what are they doing, my answeres gonna be, they're still just standing there, and they are still just talking!!"

Tucker ".......... What are they talking about?"
Church" You know what? I fukin hate you!"

Quoted from Red vs Blue Season 1
 
Eric: In Paris, it's good to smell like you've been f*cking to make them respect you.

-Killing Zoe

*Sherpa FE- I love RvB, good quote
 
Zoë: So... trap?
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Trap.
Zoë: We goin' in?
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Ain't but a few hours out.
Hoban 'Wash' Washburn: Yeah, but... remember the part where it's a trap?

There are so many good ones from the series, and the movie that it's hard to narrow it down. :)
 
Pan out on Grif and Simmons, who are approaching another Red soldier (Sarge) clad in red armor.

Sarge: Hurry up, ladies. This ain't no ice cream social.

Simmons: Ice cream social?

Simmons and Grif exchange looks.

Switch to Sarge.

Sarge: Stop the pillow talk you two. Anyone want to guess why I gathered you here today.

Grif: Uh...is it because the war's over and you're sending us home?

Sarge (mockingly): That's exactly it, Private. War's over. We won. Turns out you're the big hero and we're gonna hold a parade in your honor. I get to drive the float, and Simmons here, IS IN CHARGE OF CONFETTI!!

Grif: I'm no stranger to sarcasm, sir.

Sarge: Goddamn it, Private! Shut your mouth or else I'll have Simmons slit your throat while you're asleep!

Simmons: Oh I'd do it, too.

Sarge: I know you would, Simmons. Good man. *pauses* Couple of things today ladies. Command has seen fit to increase our ranks here at Blood Gulch Outpost Number One.

Grif: Oh crap. We're getting a rookie.

Sarge: That's right, dead man. Our new recruit will be here within the week, but today we recieved the first part of our shipment from Command.

Grif and Simmons exchange looks again.

Sarge turns towards a hill behind them.

Sarge: Lopez, bring up the vehicle.

A large, armor-plated, jeep-like vehicle comes over the rise with Lopez in the driver seat, who pulls up along side the Reds.

Simmons: Shotgun!

Grif: Shotgun! *realizing he is too late* ****.

Sarge: May I introduce our new light reconnaissance vehicle.

Camera closes in on the front of the vehicle and starts to move left, circling it.

Sarge: It has four inch armor plating, mag bumper suspension, a mounted machine gunner position, and total seating for three. Gentlemen, this is the M12 LRV! I like to call it the Warthog.

Switch to Grif and Simmons.

Simmons: Why Warthog, sir?

Switch to Sarge.

Sarge: Because M12 LRV is too hard to say in conversation, son.

Switch to Grif.

Simmons: I know, but why Warthog? I mean, it doesn't really look like a pig.

Sarge (after a brief pause): Say that again.

Grif: I think it looks more like a Puma.

Sarge: What in Sam Hell is a Puma?

Simmons: Uh...you mean like the shoe company?

Grif: No it's a big cat, like a lion.

Sarge: You're making that up.

Grif: I'm telling you, it's a real animal!

Sarge: Simmons, I want you to poison Grif's next meal.

Simmons: Yes, sir!

Sarge (pointing at the front of the Warthog): Look, see these two tail hooks? They look like tusks and what kind of animal has tusks?

Switch to Grif.

Grif: A walrus.

Sarge: Didn't I just tell you to stop making up animals?!

Switch to a view of the Reds through a sniper rifle scope.

Switch to Church, wielding the rifle, and Tucker, wielding an M6D pistol.

Tucker: What is that thing?

Church lowers the rifle.

Church: I don't know, man. Looks like they've got some sorta car down there. We'd better get back to base and report it.

Tucker (taken aback): A car?! How come they get a car?!

Church: What are you complaining about, man? We're about to get a tank in the very next drop.

Tucker (disappointed): You can't pick up chicks in a tank.

Church: Oh you know what? You could ***** about anything couldn't you? We're about to get a tank, and you're worried about chicks. What chicks are we gonna pick up, man? And secondly, how are you gonna pick up chicks in a car that looks like that?

Tucker: *sighs* What kind of car is it?

Church (looking through the scope of his sniper rifle): I dunno, I've never seen a car like that before. It looks like a...uh...like a big cat of some kind.

Tucker: What like a puma?

Church: Yeah, man, there you go.

Switch to back to Red Team.

Sarge: So unless anybody has anymore mystical creatures to suggest as a name for the new vehicle, we're going to stick with the Warthog. How about it, Grif?

Grif: No, sir. No more suggestions.

Sarge: Are you sure? How about Bigfoot?

Grif: It's okay.

Sarge: Unicorn?

Grif: No really. I'm cool.

Sarge: Sasquatch?

Simmons: Leprechaun?

Grif: Hey, he doesn't need any help, man.

Sarge: Phoenix?

Grif (sighs): Christ.

Fade to black.

Sarge: Hey Simmons, what's the name of that Mexican lizard? Eats all the goats.

Simmons: Uh...that would be the chupacabra, sir.

Sarge: Hey Grif, chupathingy! How about that? I like it, gotta ring to it.
 
That's no moon. It's a space station.

Or...

I've got a baaad feeling about this.

Either one, I try to use once a week...

"that's no moon. It's my TPS report."

Michael
 
MikeFlynn 74
DUDE That was awesome, I was actually going to quote that this morning....guess I will have to do something different..

Red vs Blue Seaon 2

Doc " I am not sure that I am entirely comfortable with that, besides even if I could fight, I wouldnt, I'm a pacifist".
Caboose" Your a thing that babies suck on?"
Tucker " No dude that a pediphile, no wait I was thinking of something else".
Church" Real classy Tucker".
 
Back when I was picking beans in Guatemala, we used to make fresh coffee, right off the trees I mean. That was good. This is sh*t but, hey, I'm in a police station.

-The Usual Suspects
 
"Is this your homework, Larry?"

Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski
 
Airplane:

(I can't ever set foot in an airport without thinking of this one)
"Look Betty, don't start up with your white zone sh&t again."

"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue."

"You ever seen a grown man naked?"

Blazing Saddles

(Besides "Da white wimmen" quote)

"Mongo only pawn... in game of life."

"Excuse me while I whip this out."


I could pretty much put the script for both movies.
 
Knocked Up
"Hey Doc Howard, Ben Stone calling. Guess what the ****'s up? Allison is going into labor and you are not ****ing here, you know where you're at? You're at a ****ing bar mitzvah in San Francisco you mother****ing piece of ****, and you know what I'm gonna have to do now? I'm going have to kill you, I'm gonna pop a ****ing cap in your ass. Your dead, your Tupac, you are ****ing Biggie you piece of ****, I hope you ****ing die or drop the chair and kill that ****ing kid... I hope your plane crashes, peace ****er!"
 
"I ain't got time to bleed" The Body in Predator.

"I know I seem a little too old to be in College. But for this movie you've gotta suspend disbelief." Howard Stern
 
I've been beaten to Kevin Smith movies and Army of Darkness, so I need to fall back on Ghostbusters.

Where do these stairs go?
They go up.

I'm fuzzy on the whole good-bad thing.

I like her because she's a client and she sleeps above the covers. FOUR FEET above the covers! She barks! She snarls! She drools!

Dogs and cats, living together! It'll be anarchy!
 
Delmar: "gopher everette?"

Everette: "No thank you Delmar. A third of a gopher would only arouse my appetite without properly beddin' her down."

Oh brother where art thou.
 
Reporter: Say listen, is he working on a case?
Nora Charles: Yes, he is.
Reporter: What case?
Nora Charles: A case of scotch. Pitch in and help him.
 
"Oh, I eat meat. I just don't dig on swine."
Click to expand...

"Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy mother****er. Pigs sleep and root in ****. That's a filthy animal. I ain't eat nothin' that ain't got enough sense enough to disregard its own feces."
 
"The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright, so he hid it, in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you. "
 
DUDE
What the hell is this?

WALTER
My dirty undies. Laundry, Dude.
The whites.

DUDE
Agh--

He closes the briefcase.

DUDE
Walter, I'm sure there's a reason
you brought your dirty undies--

WALTER
Thaaaat's right, Dude. The weight.
The ringer can't look empty.

DUDE
Walter--what the **** are you
thinking?

WALTER
Well you're right, Dude, I got to
thinking. I got to thinking why
should we settle for a measly ****ing
twenty grand--

DUDE
We? What the **** we? You said you
just wanted to come along--

WALTER
My point, Dude, is why should we
settle for twenty grand when we can
keep the entire million. Am I wrong?

DUDE
Yes you're wrong. This isn't a
****ing game, Walter--

WALTER
It is a ****ing game. You said so
yourself, Dude--she kidnapped herself--
 
Shocked this one hasn't appeared

"Here. Have a beer. Don't cost nothin'."

bluto_02.jpg
 
Hopfan said:
You take a f**kin shower, I'll get your f**kin suit
Click to expand...

Classic :D

Imagine you're a deer. You're prancing along. You get thirsty. You spot a little brook. You put your little deer lips down to the cool, clear water - BAM. A ****in' bullet rips off part of your head. Your brains are lying on the ground in little bloody pieces. Now I ask ya, would you give a **** what kind of pants the son-of-a-***** who shot you was wearing?
 
Proably my favorite few minute from any movie ever - Full Metal Jacket (LONG):

Private Joker: [whispering] Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Who said that? Who the **** said that? Who's the slimy little communist **** twinkle-toed c0cksucker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy ****ing godmother said it! Out-****ing-standing! I will P.T. you all until you ****ing die! I'll P.T. you until your ******** are sucking buttermilk!. [Gunnery Sergeant Hartman grabs Private Cowboy by the shirt.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Was it you, you scroungy little ****, huh?!

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: You little piece of ****! You look like a ****ing worm! I'll bet it was you!

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Private Joker: Sir, I said it, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well... no ****. What have we got here, a ****ing comedian? Private Joker? I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and **** my sister. [Gunnery Sergeant Hartman punches Private Joker in the stomach. He sags to his knees.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: You little scumbag! I've got your name! I've got your ass! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. I will teach you. Now get up! Get on your feet! You had best un**** yourself or I will unscrew your head and **** down your neck! Private Joker: Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Private Joker, why did you join my beloved Corps?

Private Joker: Sir, to kill, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: So you're a killer!

Private Joker: Sir, yes sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Let me see your war face!

Private Joker: Sir?

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: You got a war face? Aaaaaaaagh! That's a war face. Now let me see your war face!

Private Joker: Aaaaaaaagh!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! You didn't convince me! Let me see your real war face!

Private Joker: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: You don't scare me! Work on it!

Private Joker: Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What's your excuse?

Private Cowboy: Sir, excuse for what, sir?

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I'm asking the ****ing questions here, Private. Do you understand?!

Private Cowboy: Sir, yes, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?

Private Cowboy: Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you shook up? Are you nervous?

Private Cowboy: Sir, I am, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do I make you nervous?

Private Cowboy: Sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Sir, what? Were you about to call me an *******?!

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, Private?

Private Cowboy: Sir, five foot nine, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked **** that high! You trying to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you've been cheated! Where in hell are you from anyway, Private?

Private Cowboy: Sir, Texas, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Holy dog****! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks?

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you a peter-puffer?

Private Cowboy: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would **** a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around! I'll be watching you!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Did your parents have any children that lived?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name, fatbody?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, Leonard Lawrence, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Lawrence? Lawrence, what, of Arabia?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: That name sounds like royalty! Are you royalty?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do you suck dicks?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I don't like the name Lawrence! Only fagots and sailors are called Lawrence! From now on you're Gomer Pyle!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir! [Pyle smiles strangely.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do you think I'm cute, Private Pyle? Do you think I'm funny?

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Then wipe that disgusting grin off your face!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well, any ****ing time, sweetheart!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, I'm trying, sir.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds--exactly three ****ing seconds--to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-**** you! One! Two! Three!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, I can't help it, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! Get on your knees, scumbag! [Pvt. Pyle drops to his knees. Sgt. Hartman holds out his hand.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Now choke yourself! [Pvt. Pyle puts his own hands around his neck.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Goddamn it, with my hand, numb nuts!! [Pvt. Pyle reaches towards Sgt. Hartman's hand. Hartman jerks it away.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Don't pull my ****ing hand over there! I said choke yourself! Now lean forward and choke yourself! [Pvt. Pyle leans forward onto Sgt. Hartman's hand. Hartman chokes Pyle.]

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you through grinning?

Private Gomer Pyle: [barely able to speak] Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! I can't hear you!

Private Gomer Pyle: [gasping] Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bull****! I still can't hear you! Sound off like you've got a pair!

Private Gomer Pyle: [gagging] Sir, yes, sir!

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: That's enough! Get on your feet! Private Pyle, you had best square your ass away and start ****ting me Tiffany cuff links... or I will definitely **** you up!

Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir!
 
Mitch: Oh, ****! Ah, that hurt like ****!
Samantha: I know. That's why I distracted you first. Same principle as deflowering virgins.
Mitch: Huh? What? Virgin - ? What?
Samantha: Read it in this Harold Robbins book. Guy bites her on the ear. Distracts from the pain. Ever try that?
Mitch: No, no, I sock 'em in the jaw and yell, "Pop goes the weasel."

-The Long Kiss Goodnight
 
"See what happens Larry!, Do you see what happens when you......." Walter Sobchak THE BIG LEBOWSKI

"Dude, you're gonna have to pick those bullets up, I don't want to be vacuming the carpet next week and shoot myself in the face" Red PINEAPPLE EXPRESS

"There is nothing so depraved as a man in the depths of an ether binge" Hunter S. Thompson FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS
 
calixto said:
"See what happens Larry!, Do you see what happens when you......." Walter Sobchak THE BIG LEBOWSKI

"Dude, you're gonna have to pick those bullets up, I don't want to be vacuming the carpet next week and shoot myself in the face" Red PINEAPPLE EXPRESS

"There is nothing so depraved as a man in the depths of an ether binge" Hunter S. Thompson FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS
Click to expand...

Oh hey that's just wrong posting your first post in the non-brewing forum :D

Welcome to the forums! :p
 
Don't know if it's been used yet but here it goes..

From Anchorman:

Fantana: I was in love once, I think.

Burgundy: What was her name?

Fantana: I don't know..

Burgundy: Thats not a good start but continue

Fantana: She was Brazilian or Chinese.. or somethin. . We made out for hours in the Kmart bathroom, then we parted ways never to see each other again. .

Burgundy: Brian, I'm pretty sure that's not love..

Fantana: DAMMIT!
 
Connor: Okay, Roc...
Rocco: What? You guys got masks.
Murphy: You look like Mush Mouth from Fat Albert.
Rocco: Fine! Fack it. When we're done, she can ID me. I don't care. Just trying to be professional, but nooooo...
Connor: It looks fine!
Rocco: Fack it.
Connor: Now shut the fack up, you look good. Put it on! You look fackin' scary, man!
Connor: [trying not to laugh] Now Roc, are you sure that you're obee-kay-bee?

Boondock Saints
 

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