What’s wrong with her?!

[BrannDon]

So I am in the sad sad position in which my wife, brace yourself, does NOT like beer. Like at all. She drinks flavored sparking water and said she doesn’t like it because she says it tastes like beer (WTF beer did you drink back in the day?!). Can’t share my wonderful creations with her, can’t share my craft brewery gem finds with her. Can’t say “I know it’s a white stout but it totally hits your palette like a stouts doesn’t it?!” to her. How is a man to exist in such a fractured twisted reality?! Do you feel me (or are you one of those jerks whose wives just love their beer and can’t wait to taste the next slurry out of the fermentor)?!

 

[Rev2010]

doesn’t NOT like beer.

Thought you were trying to put a play on words and realized that was just a typo. Dude, unfortunately the vast majority of women don't care for beer and want either sweet cocktails or wine. Just the way things are. There are of course those that do love beer, but there are definitely few of them out there. My ex-wife liked some beers and would taste mine. Only once or twice she "asked" me for one of my beers as she preferred her Jack Daniels and Coke. My current girlfriend also is not a beer drinker. I do have a female friend that does like some beers however.

Suck it up, gotta live with it unless you want to ditch her and keep looking LOL. Have any brother-in-law's or father-in-law's to share your beer with? I used to and that's who (family'wise) I shared beers with. Then there was co-workers, friends, bandmates, etc. It sucks to not have the person you are absolutely closest too wanting to imbibe on the fruits of your labor, but so is life. Does she not even like Hefeweizen's? Most women I know love them. I mean, *everyone* should love them in the entire world!


Rev.

 

[Smellyglove]

My GF drinks out of the fermenter and gives me feedback.

Get a cider-extract kit? I don't know how to break it to her that "her" fridge where shes been fermenting two cider batches side by side and back to back for several batches now will soon get reverted back to my lagering-fridge.

 

[passedpawn]

My wife is almost a complete no-drinker. It has its advantages. DD.

 

[ong]

My GF drinks out of the fermenter and gives me feedback.

Get a cider-extract kit? I don't know how to break it to her that "her" fridge where shes been fermenting two cider batches side by side and back to back for several batches now will soon get reverted back to my lagering-fridge.

Sounds like an excellent opportunity to try warm-fermented lagers!

 

[SEndorf]

After 40 years we both have our hobbies that the other supports, but has no interest in. For beer she drinks nothing but coors lite. I made a tasteless clone once. (shrug) She didn't like it.
Share your craft with your pals, co-workers, and other brewers. They'll probably give you more honest feedback anyway.

 

[Smellyglove]

Sounds like an excellent opportunity to try warm-fermented lagers!

Not really as none of the lagers I've tasted that way has been anywhere close to what I feel a lager should be. But I'm currently doing a step-regime-research I'm curious about, but still, that fridge will be mine, because of the lagering. I'll just say that keep it in the basement for a few days then move it up to the living room (I'm the one who has to carry it up though).

But the funny thing is. After she started making her own extract-ciders she finally understand "something". Whenever I used a hydrometer before she sometimes just asked "out fishing again? I don't understand that sh*t". First time she measured her own cider she said "45! Is that good!?". Now she knows about OG and FG, and the impact is has. And also with sanitation. I've told her to strip down on her overarms when mixing it with a paddle since stuff clings to your clothes and might fall down into the wort/must. Last time I came closer to her while mixing her cocktail she sort of just moved towards me to create a buffer between me and the must and told me to stay away.

 

[SanPancho]

if she wants water with alcohol then thats what she'll go for. you can try and "educate" but risk being condescending and pissing her off. at least thats what happened with an old GF of mine.

in any case, all you can do is go for the lightest stuff out there if you wanna force the issue. berliner weiss? cider was mentioned. what about a super dry mead with fruit or something like that?

other than that, you're gonna need to lager for a long ass time to get on the level of BMC, so better off to not bother unless you want to drink it too. about the only way you could go about this without being a jerk is to ask her to taste with the idea that you're looking for a specific flavor, i.e. "honey, not sure i got this recipe right, do you get any coffee/toffee/citrus/mango/etc flavor?" basically trick her into trying everything as your "taster" and see if you get lucky and she likes something.

could be worse. my wife will kill a twelver of something she really likes pretty quick if i dont pay attention.

 

[Redpappy]

Mine hates alcohol... so I can not get her to try mine at all. It a blessing and a curse.. blessing because it means it’s all mine, but a curse cause I can not share them with her

 

[GPP33]

Meh, mine doesn’t like beer at all and only drinks about a half dozen other drinks per decade. I know I have a DD and I don’t have to share. Doesn’t bother me that she doesn’t like it and she doesn’t care that I spend so much time making it. We have other reasons to be together.

 

[mongoose33]

RDWHAHB

 

[homebrewer_99]

Mine doesn't drink either. In my book that's called GOOD PLANNING! A built in Designated Driver.

 

[Jayjay1976]

My wife is brutally honest regarding her impressions of my homebrew. So far I haven't brewed an IPA that lives up to her expectations, but she does like my boho pils and munich helles... I'm going to keep working on my IPAs until she approves.

 

[Lefou]

Sometimes I will save extra wort from the sparge, dilute somewhat, and chill. It becomes grain tea.
The non-alcoholic tea is loaded with vitamins and minerals from the barley and is actually quite good for you. Wife is no fan of the alcohol but likes to have some sweet, non-tannic tea from time to time. She will volunteer to taste my beer but refuses to drink for the most part because even a half-glass of wine will put her lightweight butt to sleep.

 

[treacheroustexan]

because even a half-glass of wine will put her lightweight butt to sleep.

I hear you there. I just had to finish 7 oz of a 12 oz bottle of cider haha.

 

[GPP33]

Sometimes I will save extra wort from the sparge, dilute somewhat, and chill. It becomes grain tea.
The non-alcoholic tea is loaded with vitamins and minerals from the barley and is actually quite good for you. Wife is no fan of the alcohol but likes to have some sweet, non-tannic tea from time to time. She will volunteer to taste my beer but refuses to drink for the most part because even a half-glass of wine will put her lightweight butt to sleep.

I've thought about carbonating the end runnings, once the gravity drops to about 1.01 it's actually pretty damn good, could make a good soda.

 

[RevKev]

Make wine or mead [emoji6]

 

[BrannDon]

Mine doesn't drink either. In my book that's called GOOD PLANNING! A built in Designated Driver.

Hahaha amen to that

 

[Wash1]

Don't really have anything new to add, just my 2 cents FWIW. I too have been married for over 40yrs, and even though she's a PharmD and enjoys talking about the chemistry side of brewing, she absolutely doesn't like the taste. We get along really well though, I don't push her to taste, and she leaves me to my hobbies and says "enjoy"!

 

[SEndorf]

Don't really have anything new to add, just my 2 cents FWIW. I too have been married for over 40yrs, and even though she's a PharmD and enjoys talking about the chemistry side of brewing, she absolutely doesn't like the taste. We get along really well though, I don't push her to taste, and she leaves me to my hobbies and says "enjoy"!

Well... perhaps you need to look at your process and sanitation...
LOL... only kidding.
I wish my DW could discuss brewing water chemistry. It's a subject I find fascinating and would welcome the feedback.
But..She has her bookclubs... I have my brewing mancave....
We enjoy other hobbies together.

 

[AZCoolerBrewer]

My wife always tries my beer and never says anything bad about it. She loves my IPAs, but at the same time doesn’t drink much beer unless it’s a special occasion like Oktoberfest or a beer festival. I actually think it’s perfect because she doesn’t drink all my beer, but she still can enjoy it with me on occasion.

 

[BBQB]

Time for a new wife? ...too harsh

 

[SEndorf]

Time for a new wife? ...too harsh

Now that's just silly.
A good marriage comprises three parts - him, her, and us.
Many marriages fail because one of the partners only sees "us" without acknowledging individual activities and interests.
<Steps off podium>

 

[day_trippr]

My wife is my IBU meter, I run the first pour by her for every batch and watch how much her nose wrinkles
She enjoys my wheats and pilsners, and even my tamer neipas, but anything above an actual 50 on the IBU scale and I lose her...

Cheers!

 

[homebrewer_99]

I hear you there. I just had to finish 7 oz of a 12 oz bottle of cider haha.

Half glass? Quite a few times I've finished 2 wine bottles of cider in a night...by myself.

Now that's just silly.
A good marriage comprises three parts - him, her, and us.
Many marriages fail because one of the partners only sees "us" without acknowledging individual activities and interests. <Steps off podium>

You forgot the mic drop...

Two old friends out in a boat...fishing.
#1: I'm thinking about divorcing my wife.
#2: Why?
#1: Well, she hasn't spoken to me in almost 6 months.
#2: I'd rethink that divorce idea. A wife like that is hard to find.

Thanks you, I'll be here all weekend. Don't forget to tip your waitstaff...they don't like walking upright.

 

[KonservativeJay]

Could definitely be worse. My wife is plenty happy to help me drink my beer. She has zero interest in brewing, talking about or doing. She has no interest in all of the cool equipment I want to get. She has no interest in waiting for the beer to finish. She just wants me to brew her beer she likes (IPA’s) and she wants to know why they are always gone!!

 

[GPP33]

Does your wife know you started a thred on an Internet forum titled “What’s wrong with her”?

 

[madscientist451]

There's nothing wrong with her. She just enjoys different beverages than you do. If you aren't THANKFUL that she accepts YOU the way you are, and she accepts all the TIME AND MONEY you spend on beer and brewing, then we should be asking the question: "what's wrong with you"?
Brew on, man, and remember "happy wife=happy life".

 

[seatazzz]

My husband likes most of my brews, but isn't interested in the process, and really doesn't drink that much. I drink the vast majority of my labors because I have loved beer all of my life...ever since I was four years old, Dad said 'please get me a beer', and I got to taste it. Was love at first sip.

 

[6Tap]

My wife has no interest in drinking beer or Home brewing. That is ok since we have plenty of other hobbies we enjoy doing together + she is the designated driver if I have a few beers when we go out to eat. She supports me in this hobby by giving me the ok to build a designated
brew room in our garage. I enjoy my time alone when I brew. Cheers [emoji482]

 

[SEndorf]

My wife has no interest in drinking beer or Home brewing. Thant’s ok since we have plenty of other hobbies we enjoy doing together + she is the designated driver if I have a few beers when we go out to eat. She supports me in this hobby by giving me the ok to build a designated
brew room in our garage. I enjoy my time alone when I brew. Cheers [emoji482]

I could have written this post. My garage brewery is my alone time happy place...

 

[teesherv]

But there is hope! My wife only drank girly cocktails when we met. Then she moved to BMC for a bit and discovered white zinfandel.
Fast forward, and she dipped her toes into blondes and pales, as well as other wines. I'm not much of a wine drinker, but I started with her and we compared flavors and profiles as they relate beers as well.
After more time, she has turned into a dedicated DIPA drinker who prefers IBUs starting at 75. Quite a jump from girly cocktails.
The bad news is this took time: we will celebrate 20 years of marriage at the end of this month. But again, there is hope.

 

[filthyastronaut]

My wife likes beer in an almost enthusiastically non-enthusiast sort of way. Doesn't know much about styles (gave her a Marzen, said that it tastes Belgian, and I was really worried until I figured out she meant German), actually knows quite a bit about the process for the average person who doesn't brew because of me, but is really quite dispassionate about it. It's her favorite alcoholic beverage, but she doesn't care about it that much. She will go from craving to practically banning certain categories of beer arbitrarily. Right now, she won't drink a "dark" beer, but I'm sure it'll change soon. She will simply like the beer she likes, and nothing more than that. It's bewildering.

 

[AZCoolerBrewer]

My wife likes beer in an almost enthusiastically non-enthusiast sort of way. Doesn't know much about styles (gave her a Marzen, said that it tastes Belgian, and I was really worried until I figured out she meant German), actually knows quite a bit about the process for the average person who doesn't brew because of me, but is really quite dispassionate about it. It's her favorite alcoholic beverage, but she doesn't care about it that much. She will go from craving to practically banning certain categories of beer arbitrarily. Right now, she won't drink a "dark" beer, but I'm sure it'll change soon. She will simply like the beer she likes, and nothing more than that. It's bewildering.

It’s funny, I got divorced 8 years ago and when I was in a relationship with my now current wife, I thought this woman is truly a unicorn, perfect for me and I realized she is truly perfect, but she’s still a woman. There’s those things about the women we love that are just so alien to men. I sure it’s the same way with women looking at their man and saying WTF. Sometimes I think OMG are you kidding me. But this one is great, I wouldn’t change a thing about her... but she’s still a woman.

 

[boxboybrewing]

Well, I've had 3 wives. None of which liked beer. But that was never the dealbreaker. As much as I love all things beer, I was actually sober when I proposed to them. Lol. I don't care what a woman drinks, as long as she doesn't gripe about what and how often I drink. THAT has been an issue on occasion.

 

[S-Met]

I'm one of those jerks whose wife loves beer and is not shy about telling me about her likes and dislikes for food or brew.

Good news is that she didn't start that way. She was a midori sour drinker, or apple-pucker&sprite. Once she realized there was no alcohol in those drinks, she graduated to mai-tais, Tokyo tea, Long island, etc. But I cant tell you how many of those drinks she never finished because they were poorly made and tasted awful.

Occasionally a wine cooler, jack daniels cooler or a Smirnoff ice, but not every place has those. Out one evening, I had her take a sip of a fruit wheat - ether Pyramid apricot or Lost Coast raspberry or tangerine wheat. Not her favorite, but drinkable. One night we were out and I ordered a nitro-stout. Needless to say, I drank her crappy drink and she had my nitro-stout.

Leaving out the wineries, but will say she went from Beringer White Zin to calling out Residual sugar on supposedly dry wines and enjoying premium wine... fast forward to beer.

Now she says what breweries we are going to stop at along our way to wherever. She still doesn't love IPAs, but will drink pales if theyre balanced. Occasionally a DIPA for the same reasons.

Sours: some she likes, as long as they're not too horsey. The gose are good palate pleasers too.

Guess I'm saying, not the end of the world if the spouse doesn't love beer. But be open and try to expose her to a wide variety - including Ciders. I honestly believe that there is no such thing as someone who does not like beer/wine, rather they have not had a beer/cider/wine that they like. Not just style, but producer.

 

[gwinn758]

Mine doesn't like beer for the most part, she likes mixed drinks/Margaritas. She let me build a kegerator and put it in the dining room, I bought her a margarita machine. Any time friends come over for a beer, I make her margaritas. She will go to breweries with me though, which means i have a DD.

 

[allanmorgan]

Wasn't going to say anything, but not sure what you mean by this:

but she’s still a woman.

Twice no less. Just saying. Don't understand.

 

[lootcorp]

My wife does like beer, but she has styles she just won't drink. She hates traditional hefes -- the bubblegum/clove/banana thing does not do it for her. She used to not like hoppy beer, but she gradually became an IPA fan. She also surprised me by taking a liking to sours after initially avoiding them like the plague.

In fact, come to think of it, it's my wife who got me into craft beer with a visit to Harpoon way back in the dark ages. That's also what got my started brewing.

There are so many styles and flavor profiles out there, is it possible there's something your wife might like? Is she willing to try a sip of different styles, or is it just a hard no to any beer?

 

[AZCoolerBrewer]

Wasn't going to say anything, but not sure what you mean by this:



Twice no less. Just saying. Don't understand.

At the very least, the constructs of the patriarchy cause annoying differences in women.