Things SWMBO says on brewday:

[DudeAbides]

Feel sorry for some of you poor bastards.

10am on brew day, wort is a boilin in the kitchen and the wife comes home from her workout. She walks in and says it smells wonderful, then immediately goes to the garage and brings back a couple RyePA's from the last batch-"how can you stand there smelling that and NOT have a beer in your hand?".

 

[RoughandReadyRanch]

Feel sorry for some of you poor bastards.

10am on brew day, wort is a boilin in the kitchen and the wife comes home from her workout. She walks in and says it smells wonderful, then immediately goes to the garage and brings back a couple RyePA's from the last batch-"how can you stand there smelling that and NOT have a beer in your hand?".

Dick

 

[cluckk]

When I tell my wife I'm going to brew she gives a look like it's an inconvenience and rolls her eyes. But let the keg of her favorite in the kegerator go empty and I get the same look along with a pout. Then she'll ask when I'm going to brew it again. I think the look on brewday is just an act.

 

[Flipadelphia]

Sounds like you guys have some bitchy wives wow. I feel bad.

It seems like a common question is, when are you going to be done? My question is, why do they care?

My significant other doesn't say anything, just as I don't say anything when she does whatever she wants to do. We're grown ups, it's our business.

 

[TangoHotel]

If I surprise her with a brew day, I hear a lot more. I've since started planning brew days a week ahead of time to avoid this. Now I will get "how can I help?" or "what step is this?" or a "now, why do you have to mash/boil for ___ minutes?" in a genuine i-want-to-know fashion. She'll keep the kids outta my space for that time without complaint and will usually throw a couple games of darts with me during the mash or boil, depending if the kids are sleeping. The saying goes "happy wife, happy life." I pull my fair share around the house with laundry dishes cleaning and cooking too. Plus, I don't say Boo if she wants to go out with a friend or do her hobbies.

If you have complainer, involve her in the process, even if involves the passing of downtime. Or hell, give her a break during a 90 minute mash/boil and take the kids or do a chore. All that cleaning of beer equipment that needs to get done during those times can wait if you can do something that prevents a headache. Happy wife, happy life.

 

[Flipadelphia]

Happy wife, happy life.

I guess I see things different. My motto is...I'm an adult and can do what I want.

I seriously don't know how you guys deal with being with a woman who complains frequently.

 

[TangoHotel]

I think you read this wrong. I get no complaints.

Kinda ironic how I'm an adult and I'll do what I want sounds so childish. I got 4 people in my house, and all of the time their needs outweigh my wants.

 

[cluckk]

Kinda ironic how I'm an adult and I'll do what I want sounds so childish. I got 4 people in my house, and all of the time their needs outweigh my wants.

TH, you said that so much nicer than I wanted to. I just deleted mine rather than posting.

 

[Flipadelphia]

TH, you said that so much nicer than I wanted to. I just deleted mine rather than posting.

Ouch bro I'm really upset I missed out on your internet lashing.

 

[Flipadelphia]

I think you read this wrong. I get no complaints.

Kinda ironic how I'm an adult and I'll do what I want sounds so childish. I got 4 people in my house, and all of the time their needs outweigh my wants.

And I don't. I also don't have a woman who wears my pants.

To answer the OP, here's how our convo goes:

Me: I'm brewing today
Her: Cool

other situations..

Her: I'm taking the dog to the park/running/going shopping/visiting friends today
Me: Cool

Not hard.

 

[cluckk]

I also don't have a woman who wears my pants.

Post two deleted.

 

[sfrisby]

Pay no attention to this guy. He's trying to talk trash to me on another thread.

 

[TangoHotel]

No worries. Merely an observation. I get more time to do the things I want when I fulfill the needs of others in my family.

Not really a "she wears the pants issue. " more of "I'm a better husband and father because I do this" thing.

 

[cluckk]

Guys like this are a dime a dozen. And TH, "fulfilling the needs of others for whom you are responsible" is the definition of an adult. "Doing what I want" is how a child mistakenly defines it.

 

[TangoHotel]

When in doubt

 

[Yooper]

I guess I see things different. My motto is...I'm an adult and can do what I want.

I seriously don't know how you guys deal with being with a woman who complains frequently.

Well, of course we're being tongue in check and just mentioning the comments- not dealing with someone who complains frequently.

I have a fantastic marriage, where we both are happy and fulfilled and are equal partners in everything. We love being together and enjoy doing most things together.

But if I told my partner that I could do what I want, and not be attentive to what they want and need, it wouldn't be a very good marriage. Both sides need to be considerate of the other person.

We are not talking about being married to someone who's bitching- we're talking about those things that the other person has to put up with sometimes for our obsession, er, hobby. Just like my other half has other hobbies that I'm not interested in, but I tolerate for his happiness.

I actually feel very sorry for a person who is partnered with someone who does whatever they want, whenever they want, in spite of the needs of the family and marriage, because it means they are a self centered bastard.

 

[Flipadelphia]

Guys like this are a dime a dozen. And TH, "fulfilling the needs of others for whom you are responsible" is the definition of an adult. "Doing what I want" is how a child mistakenly defines it.

So because I brew my beer when I choose to, that makes me a child?

So because I brew my beer when I choose to, I am not fulfilling needs of anyone else in my life?

How do you know this exactly?

My posts were meant to imply that I do not ask permission to brew. If you don't think there are guys out there that have to do that, you're delusional. Probably some on here.

 

[Flipadelphia]

Well, of course we're being tongue in check and just mentioning the comments- not dealing with someone who complains frequently.

I have a fantastic marriage, where we both are happy and fulfilled and are equal partners in everything. We love being together and enjoy doing most things together.

But if I told my partner that I could do what I want, and not be attentive to what they want and need, it wouldn't be a very good marriage. Both sides need to be considerate of the other person.

We are not talking about being married to someone who's bitching- we're talking about those things that the other person has to put up with sometimes for our obsession, er, hobby. Just like my other half has other hobbies that I'm not interested in, but I tolerate for his happiness.

I actually feel very sorry for a person who is partnered with someone who does whatever they want, whenever they want, in spite of the needs of the family and marriage, because it means they are a self centered bastard.

if you're allowed to be tongue-in-cheek, then so am I.

Obviously if my wife is having chest pains I'm not going to say, "Wait a minute I need to hit my strike temp"

I feel sorry for guys who have wives who complain about their hobbies. You know exactly the kind of guy I'm talking about. That's what I meant. The guy who can barely escape life for a few hours to brew and his SO is asking 'how long', 'are you going to clean this up?', etc etc. That doesn't sound like a very good functional life either. I couldn't be with a woman like that.

My wife and I are perfectly suited for each other just as you are with your SO. She doesn't complain about anything I do and neither do I. Neither of us do outlandish, extraordinary things though so I guess that helps.

edit: There's also a huge different between 'telling your partner you can do whatever you want' and just not having a complaining partner. I am the latter. I have never told my wife once that I can do whatever I want, who would do that? She just doesn't complain, and neither do I. Complainers cause resentment in marriage if you ask me. I'm speaking more towards nagging, not complaing TBH.

 

[TangoHotel]

Best one yet: just yesterday - "This was the best Hef I've tried."

I bought several for a single blind comparison. We split the bottles and drank each from a flight. The one she liked best was the one I brewed. It went up against some tall order stuff too, like Paulaner, Hacker Pshorr, and Weihenstephaner. Looks like I'll be making this one a mainstay during the summers.

She just put in an order for 3 batches for June 1, 2014. Awesome!

Edit: technically not a brew day.

 

[drainbamage]

Yesterday at the LHBS: "Can I buy you a bench capper?"

Backstory: I've had the same cheapie wing capper since I got started. It gets the job done, but on a few occasions has shattered the neck of the bottle. My wife is usually helping me with bottling, and although we've avoided injury so far, it was probably about time to upgrade to something sturdier.

 

[BigDaddyBeard]

I brew late at night, normally start at 9 after the kids are in bed, and my woman hangs with me most of the time to the end. She keeps me in check with my times, provides me with ample snacks, goes beer for beer, and even has been known to smoke a cigar with me. As she puts it " I'm whiskey in a tea cup babe"

 

[TangoHotel]

I brew late at night, normally start at 9 after the kids are in bed, and my woman hangs with me most of the time to the end. She keeps me in check with my times, provides me with ample snacks, goes beer for beer, and even has been known to smoke a cigar with me. As she puts it " I'm whiskey in a tea cup babe"

When the kids are asleep, this is the best. Even though it's "my" hobby, we still enjoy being together during the down time. She usually disappears during chilling and clean up, though. I'd leave too. That's the most boring and tedious part. I guess she's a whiskey in a tea cup girl too. She prefers Jack.

 

[smccarter]

I've told my wife some of the comments I've read in this thread. She smiles and shakes her head, as she understands what all of the other wives are thinking.

 

[brewmcq]

From an IM conversation a couple days ago while I was at work:

her: okay. if i order chiller, what else is on short list. the controller. and?
her: or do you need to be home to see?
me: You really want to order that stuff for me, don't you? lol
her: well yeah, at least what we can afford and hopefully enough to get you at least partly up and running lover.
me: Okay.. what's my budget?
her: 200. 300 if we don't blow a ****ton in bangor tomorrow.

(Emailed her a quick spreadsheet that broke everything down)

her: grin
her: will that get you up and running?
me: The kits added on a quick $65
her: okay. so go ahead and order the stuff you need from those places lover.
her: i can order the duda if you want. it isn't a big deal who orders them. lol
her: you has a happy?
me: I has a happy.
her: likewise baby.

(About half an hour later in the conversation)

her: did you order the duda thing? lol
her: we prolly should not both order it.
me: yup
her: kk


This morning she said "I wish your stuff would come today. I wanna brew!"

We'll be brewing our first batch after this sh*tty long hiatus in a couple weeks. And I honestly don't know who's more excited.. me or her. :-D

 

[smccarter]

My posts were meant to imply that I do not ask permission to brew. If you don't think there are guys out there that have to do that, you're delusional. Probably some on here.

We all get it. You're not a boy, you're a man. You show your woman who's the boss, and put her in her place if she steps out of line.

I believe your edition of "How to have a long lasting marriage" is a bit dated. You might want to grab a more recent edition... say, something from the later part of the 20th century, or even something published this century. It might save you the cost of a divorce.

That advice comes to you free of charge, from a person with over 30 years of experience on the subject.

No need to respond to me Flipadelphia, this will be the only attention you'll get from me.

 

[sfrisby]

In almost 10 years of marriage, swmbo has never called me lover. That rocks!

On the plus side, she puts up with my brewing crap everywhere-without complaint.

 

[Flipadelphia]

We all get it. You're not a boy, you're a man. You show your woman who's the boss, and put her in her place if she steps out of line.

I believe your edition of "How to have a long lasting marriage" is a bit dated. You might want to grab a more recent edition... say, something from the later part of the 20th century, or even something published this century. It might save you the cost of a divorce.

That advice comes to you free of charge, from a person with over 30 years of experience on the subject.

No need to respond to me Flipadelphia, this will be the only attention you'll get from me.

Thank God.

 

[bobmcstuff]

I guess I see things different. My motto is...I'm an adult and can do what I want.

I seriously don't know how you guys deal with being with a woman who complains frequently.

Mine is usually happy to drink the products of my hobby, she just doesn't like the mess it makes. We live in a fairly small apartment and I brew in the kitchen, so it does kind of take over the flat while I'm doing it. So I need to make sure she's not, say, planning to cook my dinner while I'm brewing... Most of her complaints are related to the floor being all sticky or not being able to make a cup of tea etc. Kinda understandable IMO - and I'm sure it's similar for most guys.

She wouldn't mind so much if it was in a garage, shed or basement or whatever.

 

[Melana]

Thanks to a little help from Yooper I brewed an IPA for John today. He was there to do the heavy lifting and kept our four year old entertained. Many thanks Lorena... From one SWMBO to another!
I was sure to thank him for his help!

 

[Yooper]

Thanks to a little help from Yooper I brewed an IPA for John today. He was there to do the heavy lifting and kept our four year old entertained. Many thanks Lorena... From one SWMBO to another!
I was sure to thank him for his help!

I'm so glad that you are brewing again!!!!! And that the big guy was so helpful with the little one. Awesome. Let me know how that IPA comes out!

I brewed an IPA today too, since we were talking about it so much it made me very thirsty for one!

:rockin: