I am so old

[Kee]

I'm so old that written language was a fancy new concept that scared the elders.

Was that cuneiform or hieroglyphics? Had to be before the collapse of the first bronze age.

 

[unionrdr]

Well, actually, it was Phoenician scratchin's with a stylus. Another unfortunate by-product of old age & lost hormones...or is that whoremones?...is that I don't look good naked anymore. I'm a deep-fried, double-wide version, of the man I was before! If ah keep awn like ahm doin', I won't fit through the door, & I don't look good naked anymore!...