"Students are not allowed to defend themselves when they are attacked"

[TXCrash]

Yup...

More favoritism...

More troubled kids...

Impossible to blend in...

I got in fights almost weekly in private school. Almost got in ONE at public school - guy approaches me with 4 of his friends... pulled crazy big guy on em and was left alone after that...

Private schools are just as bad if not worse.....trust me.

 

[HBHoss]

She's claiming that she didn't know what was going on, because she was busy with other students. THAT matter, I WILL take up with the school board.

Absolutely. If the teacher didn't know what was going on then they need a wake up call to class room reality. 2 boys against one younger girl, sounds like sexual harassment to me. Here in Cali. those boys probably would have been expelled.

 

[GroovePuppy]

Similar story here with my 12 year old a few years back. Known bully in his year grabbed him in passing and got him in a headlock so my son bit him. Biting is not allowed due to viral transfer concerns so the Principal planned to give him detention. School decided to continue with his detention even though the other boy admitted an unprovoked attack. I basically forbade them from following through and told them I'd explain to him he should never bite again, that I would instruct him to stamp on the feet, bring the back of his head into their face and try to knock them over. Absolutely no biting though!

Stupid schools. Their main reason for continuing with the punishment even though he was not at fault was because the paperwork had already been submitted.

 

[kjung]

Absolutely. If the teacher didn't know what was going on then they need a wake up call to class room reality. 2 boys against one younger girl, sounds like sexual harassment to me. Here in Cali. those boys probably would have been expelled.

Hmmmm....Now THER'ES a plan af attack that I hadn't thought of !!! Especially since they DID grab the front of her shirt !

Thanks !

 

[HBHoss]

Hmmmm....Now THER'ES a plan af attack that I hadn't thought of !!! Especially since they DID grab the front of her shirt !

Thanks !

Oh HELL yes then. Totally unacceptable behavior. They need to learn you can't go grabbing a girls clothes. (At least without permission first). Those boys are lucky to be able to walk.

 

[Jonnio]

I agree with all that has been posted - I have a baby girl and if she was ever in this situation I would hope she did the same.

If it were my son, the beating she gave him wouldn't even come close to the punishment he got when he came home either. People need to start teaching boys to be gentlemen again.

 

[EdWort]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension. If they don't immediately purge that from her school record, I'd have the police arrest both football players for assault (and attempted rape, (you don't know what was going on in their heads) and I would immediately file suit against the school for allowing this to happen. Great job on the media invite too.

This suspension is a dark mark on her school record and should not be there and I would not stand for it.

F'ing lame ass school officials. I would make them pay in spades.

/spit.

 

[Baja_Brewer]

People need to start teaching boys to be gentlemen again.

+100

People claim reverse sexism towards the fact that guys should treat girls with more delicacy, etc.. But I say fu(k that, boys, teenagers and most other young guys these days need to learn what manners are and how to treat a lady.

 

[Boerderij_Kabouter]

Ed, that was one of the better rants I have heard here. Well done. The making them pay in spades part sent shivers down me spine.

 

[Beerrific]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension.

I agree. You should settle for a written apology from both young men and the teacher, possibly the principal too.

IMO, you should have your attorney submit a complaint to the school board anyway (since it is family and hopefully free). The fact that they thought the an out of school suspension was acceptable in this situation shows that something is wrong.

 

[MikeFlynn74]

Your daughter shouldve had a gun!

 

[Donner]

no guns in school, it's a 'victim disarmament zone', please.

You should call the school up tomorrow, ask to talk to the principal. Say something like you've had time to think it over and would like the contact information for the school district's attorney and the same info for his union.

I don't think you want this suspension on any of her transcripts. I don't know about trying to push anything with the boys. I don't have kids, but they make mistakes and should be punished, but it's the school that is really effed up.

I'd also like to point out how the 'don't fight back' attitude has permeated our society. It's sad, really. Somehow it's better not to have fought back than to have risked injuring the attacker...

 

[Mutilated1]

look on the bright side - I bet nobody ****s with your daughter anymore

 

[Displaced MassHole]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension. If they don't immediately purge that from her school record, I'd have the police arrest both football players for assault (and attempted rape, (you don't know what was going on in their heads) and I would immediately file suit against the school for allowing this to happen. Great job on the media invite too.

This suspension is a dark mark on her school record and should not be there and I would not stand for it.

F'ing lame ass school officials. I would make them pay in spades.

/spit.

DING DING DING......I think we have a winner. Couldn't agree more with Ed on this one.

Kjung-
Way to go brotha, if nothing else you just gain a metric butt ton of respect from your daughter....and me:rockin:

 

[hopdog]

Did I read that this happened with the teacher in the room? So what punishment was handed out to the teacher for letting this go as far as it did? Fcuking wuse teacher. Tell that teacher to get their Birkenstocks moving, jump in their Prius, and get out of Dodge. Your daughter had no choice to defend herself, and as such should not have to be penalized at all. You should be proud. I know I would be. I would also be all over that teacher's ass.

I have to defend teachers a little bit here though. Teachers don't have much recourse when a lot of things happen. I remember when I would get in trouble at school my parents would "rip me a new one" now kids parents call up and rip on the teachers because their precious kids would never do something wrong. Generally teachers go into teaching because they like kids and want to teach. They don't do it for the money. I wanted to be a teacher at one time until I did some teaching. It takes a lot more patience than I have and I am a fairly patient person.

 

[EdWort]

Ed, that was one of the better rants I have heard here. Well done. The making them pay in spades part sent shivers down me spine.

Just a Dad with a daughter who has dealt with f'ing lame ass school officials before on a similar situation where all parties were suspended including the victim (my daughter). Unfricking believable.

I got the suspension purged and personal and writen apologies from the principal and asst. principal to my daughter for their idiotic and WRONG actions.

The mindset of these school officials is beyond comprehension. It's like common sense has died and been buried.

Never back down if you are in the right.

 

[jmendez29]

So did you ever get compensation for the jersey that was ruined?

 

[EvilTOJ]

In the OP he said that the boys have to pay for a replacement jersey.

 

[jmendez29]

Oops. Didn't notice.

 

[Joe C]

I read the OP and the first page, but I also want to say good for her for defending herself.

 

[Hugh_Jass]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension. If they don't immediately purge that from her school record, I'd have the police arrest both football players for assault (and attempted rape, (you don't know what was going on in their heads) and I would immediately file suit against the school for allowing this to happen. Great job on the media invite too.

This suspension is a dark mark on her school record and should not be there and I would not stand for it.

F'ing lame ass school officials. I would make them pay in spades.

/spit.

Damn right, Ed.
Your advice is spot-on. School records are very important in the college application process. My thought was why wouldn't the school officials call this event what it was; assault and battery. Those two individuals should be charged with a crime. A 5'2 young lady isn't likely to instigate a physical confrontation with two 6'+ varsity football players.

To the OP: Consult your family member who is an attorney. I'd think he'd suggest to file a complaint with the local police at the very least. Also insist that there will be no mark in your daughter's records. Your daughter doesn't deserve a mark on her transcript, and I'd insist any indication of wrong doing on her part be removed from her record.

Sounds like the *****bags picked the wrong lady to harass that day. hehehehe

Nice job dad!

 

[Pete08]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension. If they don't immediately purge that from her school record, I'd have the police arrest both football players for assault (and attempted rape, (you don't know what was going on in their heads) and I would immediately file suit against the school for allowing this to happen. Great job on the media invite too.

This suspension is a dark mark on her school record and should not be there and I would not stand for it.

F'ing lame ass school officials. I would make them pay in spades.

/spit.

Actually, the principal should have called the police and had those boys picked up for assault. Imagine in the real world if two characters cornered a female and did what they did. I think I know where they would be spending the night.

Since nobody else asked, I will; did you ask the principal what the devil the coach and AD were doing in the office? I failed to notice if your daughter was represented by any school officials.

This is a great story, and I'm glad to hear you pressed the principal on it. As others have said, press for the suspension to be removed.

I, at one time, had thought about obtaining my admin papers, but realized I wouldn't survive the spine removal surgery that is apparently required in today's world.

 

[GreenwoodRover]

Man I'm bummed i missed this yesterday. This story elicits som many reactions/feelings.....

Super job on your daughters behalf.
**** job on the schools behalf.

Actually, the principal should have called the police and had those boys picked up for assault. Imagine in the real world if two characters cornered a female and did what they did. I think I know where they would be spending the night.

Since nobody else asked, I will; did you ask the principal what the devil the coach and AD were doing in the office? I failed to notice if your daughter was represented by any school officials.

^+1

Kjung - If I ever have a daughter, I think I'll come to you for some raising lessons (hopefully I can pay my tuition in Homebrews).

*PROSTED*

 

[srm775]

I had to go to my daughter's school today because of a fight that she was involved in.
It seems that a couple of guys in her art class didn't like the fact that my daughter was wearing a Walter Payton jersey, and started giving her crap about it.

What the hell do they have against Payton? Little pansies. They're probably pinko fudge Packer fans.

Good for her.

 

[jmulligan]

As a female who's dealt with her share of harassful males in school, this makes me really pleased that your daughter was well-equipped to deal with the situation. It also is inspiring me to tell my sister to get her daughter out of ballet and into self-defense.

Way to go for sticking up for your daughter, and I hope your former team players let those two know that that was NOT okay behavior.

 

[Gosassin]

Wow, well done dad! This kind of thing pushes me more and more towards homeschooling my kids. At least then the schooling environment will be suffused with common sense!

I doubt I'll ever have a daughter (genetic odds are stacked against me) but if I do, self-defense classes will be a must.

 

[MNBugeater]

Since nobody else asked, I will; did you ask the principal what the devil the coach and AD were doing in the office? I failed to notice if your daughter was represented by any school officials.

I was telling this story to my wife last night and she interrupted me and said "What the **** were the the AD and football coach doing there?" I agree. That should have been a sign that they had some vested interest.

As others have suggested, filing a assault or worse a sexual harassment suit against those two boys will be very damaging and likely ruin any future athletic opportunities. Not to mention the school being in the media for assault or sexual harassment occurring with a teacher in the room! My dad is a 35+ year teacher and always complains about what they CANT do in the classroom anymore. He is handcuffed in disciplining any student.

 

[Rhoobarb]

Agree with Ed, Berrrific and a lot of others here. This is a case of assualt and you have every right to flie legal action. If I were you, I would seriously consider doing so.

What the hell do they have against Payton? ...

I was thinking this same thing! You live in the Chicago area and these two football players were giving her grief about wearing a Walter Payton jersey? Payton is still revered here! People wanted him to run for mayor at one time! What football player in the Chicago area doesn't worship him the way teenage rock guitarists worship Jimmy Page or Eddie V? If that fact alone were to be revealed in the media, everyone in the Chicago area would hate these two guys!

 

[DeathBrewer]

I have a question...a little devil's advocate, if you will...

What would jesus do?

 

[Rhoobarb]

I have a question...a little devil's advocate, if you will...

What would jesus do?

Turned the two perps to stone.

 

[Homercidal]

Get the incident wiped from her record. Causing too much embarrassment to the school may prove to backfire if they feel you're being too strong.

I imagine the coach and AD wanted to be there to be able to hand out the proper punishment, because the football players' actions reflect the team and the school, and I know a few coaches who would not hesitate to suspend the players in question if their actions would tarnish the school and team image.

If my boy came home from school and this had happened to them I would let the girl, the other parent and school know that their punishment would not be a shadow on what I would do to him. I'd tell him that sorry, if you're going to be a dumb ****, bad things are going to happen to you. Now get back outside and shovel the yard! I still see some snow out there!

 

[Sir Humpsalot]

If it were me, I would let my daughter serve the in-school suspension. Here's why...

I was a pretty good kid growing up, never got in much trouble, and I was always really afraid of suspensions... and then I got one unjustly. Ever since then, I saw the light. I realized that the "punishment" they could dole out was NOTHING compared to the **** that I could get away with... and after that, I became a much more entertaining and well-adjusted kid because I realized that the punishment I'd be facing is almost half as funny as the trouble I'd be getting into!

Suspensions, detentions, meh. Instead of fighting them like they're really bad, I'd tell my kid to serve it and enjoy it. Who knows.. the extra time spent studying right during/after school hours might give her more time to go out with friends in the evening... learn that even "bad" things are sometimes actually pretty cool. I even made some good friends in the detentions... people that I definitely would not have met otherwise... It's not a bad thing, it's just a different experience... embrace it!

But yeah... I'd definitely take the sexual harassment angle... but I'd still tell my daughter to serve the suspension... and just know that she is head and shoulders above the ass clown administrators who are giving it to her.

 

[madcapstudios]

Kudos on your daughter!!!


I would not settle for the in school suspension. If they don't immediately purge that from her school record, I'd have the police arrest both football players for assault (and attempted rape, (you don't know what was going on in their heads) and I would immediately file suit against the school for allowing this to happen. Great job on the media invite too.

This suspension is a dark mark on her school record and should not be there and I would not stand for it.

F'ing lame ass school officials. I would make them pay in spades.

/spit.

+100 Ed

What if this incident had taken place in a Mall or Restaurant? What would have happened then? The police would have shown up and the two punks would very likely have ridden to the hospital in the back of a squad car on their way to the station on charges of assault, battery, attempted rape, harrassment and property damage (the jersey was a vintage collector's item right), etc. You can get away with a lot of stuff in school that would never fly in the outside world.

Hit 'em hard. Press charges. Then go after the school for trying to cover it up. The coach and AD had *no business whatsoever* sitting in on a student disciplinary hearing - regardless of whether or not there were athletes involved. The incident did not take place at a game, practice, or travel to/from said events - therefore it is *not* under the jurisdiction of the Athletic Department.

As for your daughter's "permanent record" - I wouldn't worry about the ISS. I work at a college and that kind of thing never really enters into the admissions decision (unless there's a track record of suspensions in which case that kid isn't likely to be applying at all). In fact, if she uses the experience as the basis for her application essay, it might work in her favor.

Fight the power my brutha!

 

[kjung]

I just returned from a rather lengthy meeting at the school with all parties involved.
After talking with my neighbor, who's a teacher in a neighboring town, and who's youngest daughter knows mine, I had already decide to fight the suspension, as well as have it expunged from her record. My decision was strengthened after reading all of the posts from last night.
I'll skip over all of the details, but, To make a long story short, as soon as I walked in to the meeting room, I ordered the football coach and the A.D. out, stating that this was none of their business, especially considering that the coach is on his way out after too many losing seasons, and the A.D. and I have a history between us, and not a good one. That didn't go over well, but they complied as soon as my ex b-i-l (the lawyer) walked in and re-enforced my demand.
Both boys were there, with their fathers, and one mother. The boy with both parents immediately apologized, and truly had a contrite look on his face. The other one, however, slumped into his chair looking defiant, and his dad was glaring at me.
The school refuses to do anything about my daughter's suspension, so I informed the administration that they should have their lawyer at the next school board meeting, Tuesday night.
I then told them that I want a written apology from both boys, with copies placed in all three kids files. That was when the fecal matter hit the fan.
The defiant boy then tried placing the blame for the entire incident on my daughter, stating that she cussed them out, after they made a comment about her jersey, and that she grabbed his wrist and struck him first.
Of course, he had no explanation as to how my daughter could have grabbed his wrist, if he wasn't holding on to her jersey, and why what she was wearing even mattered to him, but I digress.
Yelling and shouting ensued, so I walked out into the main office and called the police officer assigned to the school into the room.
As he walked in, I told him that I want both boys charged with assault and battery, and sexual assault.

Unfortunately, since this is the day after, the boys can't be arrested right away, until an investigation is conducted, however, after I talked to the cop privately, he assured me that they will be charged by tomorrow.

 

[kjung]

I want to thank everyone for their responses. I'm truly touched that a number of people who've posted have been supportive, and said genuinely kind things, despite the fact that we've been on opposite sides of a few threads in the Debate Forum. It's nice to know that there are intelligent people here who don't take those things personally.

In response to a few of the posts :
The coach and A.D. were there because of "school policy involving any fight concerning an athlete."
Putting my kids into Martial arts was indeed one of the wisest things that I've done as a parent, and was now obviously well worth the fight with my ex to keep them in their classes.
After talking to my daughter this morning, I've found out that at least six football players, and a couple of wrestlers, who I've also coached, are walking my daughter around school, acting as "bodyguards." A couple of the football players have hinted that there may be a blanket party in the future for at least one of the boys.

 

[madcapstudios]

Give 'em hell man!


To be cautious I wouldn't post anything here in this public forum about possible retaliation on the perps by other students. It may be admissable as premeditation/conspiracy.

 

[EdWort]

so I walked out into the main office and called the police officer assigned to the school into the room.
As he walked in, I told him that I want both boys charged with assault and battery, and sexual assault.

Unfortunately, since this is the day after, the boys can't be arrested right away, until an investigation is conducted, however, after I talked to the cop privately, he assured me that they will be charged by tomorrow.

That's right man! Off to a good start. I imagine this will all be over in a few days. Some folks will need some new undies.

I'm off to see the movie "Taken" today.

Don't mess with a father's daughter........

 

[DeathBrewer]

After talking to my daughter this morning, I've found out that at least six football players, and a couple of wrestlers, who I've also coached, are walking my daughter around school, acting as "bodyguards." A couple of the football players have hinted that there may be a blanket party in the future for at least one of the boys.

That's excellent!

 

[HBHoss]

Congrats dude for sticking to your guns there. Round one goes to Dad! :rockin:

 

[Buford]

School rules and even laws in some cases are often on the hard line zero-tolerance end of things, which is just stupid. There are often extenuating circumstances that can really qualify a situation.

Case in point - back when I was in HS in the mid 90s, a guy I knew got busted for having a gun at school. Sounds bad right? The law and school rules were pretty clear that that's a no-no. However, this was the situation:

The school was in a rural county with a lot of farmland and hunting is a big thing. The guy's car was in the shop so he took his dad's farm use truck (that had no plates, wasn't necessary at the time) to get to school. Unluckily for him, the school decided to do a random lockdown and check of the parking lot that day. As it was a farm use truck, there was a .22 rifle behind the seat that neither he nor his dad had thought about. The cops searching the parking lot found it and the poop hit the fan. School rules were that he was to be expelled and that's not even counting the legal mess.

What happened instead: there was a school board meeting, and three people came to speak on the guy's behalf. A well-known (in the county) preacher, a Boy Scout troop leader, and the county sheriff. Long story short, he got out of the "zero-tolerance" rule crap and no charges were filed. Zero-tolerance junk really means zero-thinking, just damn them all regardless of the situation. He was lucky that folks with common sense stood up against that crap.