I tried understanding your situation and feeling for you for the first few months of this, but **** dude, SPEAK UP. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. Quit worrying about what everyone else is going to think of Derek. If you wanna worry about a group's opinion, worry about everything thinking your a giant Vag whose going to end up miserable and shooting himself when he's 35.
If all you can do is ***** at me for behaving immaturely, GO AWAY. I know I'm not handling this in the most ideal of all possible ways. I don't really have close friends and the people I consider myself close to I don't talk about my relationship problems with because if things do happen to improve things will always be weird between them and my wife. So this is the only venting I get. It sucks but that's the truth.
Everybody needs to knock of the "buh, well what the eff did you expect on an internet forum" crap immediately.
Several of you seem to think I'm doing nothing but making excuses to hang on. As much as I may seem to come across that way, please believe that that's not the case. Precisely BECAUSE I'm such a pushover, when someone tells me "you have to do this", I simply
have to press and get more information, otherwise I'm just letting someone else tell me what to do. Please understand I'm trying to resolve this the best way I know how.
One of the most frustrating aspects of my life is when people tell me "you're too much of a pushover" then immediately tell me "you have to do this or that". If I take your advice you'll think I'm asserting myself when I really just did what you told me to do, and if I refuse to take your advice on face value then you'll assume it's because I'm letting someone else push me around. It's completely lose-lose.
SO PLEASE STOP TELLING ME I'M A PUSHOVER. PEOPLE HAVE BEEN TELLING ME THAT MY ENTIRE LIFE. YOU'RE NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO NOTICE, IT'S NOT GOING TO SOLVE ANYTHING, AND IT JUST HURTS MY FEELINGS.
Same goes for telling me I'm a 14-year-old twat for the way I'm handling this. I'm not exactly relationship-experienced, so cut me some effing slack.
I know the old adage goes you need to push a guy so he pushes back. That has never worked with me. So cut it out before I delete this damn thread once and for all, go back to my life where I have no outlet for my frustration, and accept defeat in this marriage.
I don't know if I've said it clearly enough yet, so here it is again: If all you're going to do is get mad at me, I don't need it. Period. So go hit a pillow or fire a gun or play some angry music or something but don't bother posting.