2. Hire 1 general contractor. Let them collect bids from their subcontractors and give you a firm price. Do not do a cost + agreement. If they insist on a cost + agreement, move on to a new general contractor.
3. The general contractor should be responsible for making sure the subs come to the site, not you. They are also responsible for keeping the job on schedule, not you.
4. Never pay upfront, unless materials have delivered. Contractors have credit, lines of credit, and often payment terms with their suppliers. There should never be a time you have to give a contractor money and trust that they are going to go out and spend it on material.
All of this will probably lead to getting a final price that is more expensive than subbing it out all yourself, but you'll have a finished project in a reasonable amount of time, without all the headaches. Anyone who tells you the above advice doesn't apply to residential construction doesn't know what they are talking about.
#2) I used to work for a commerical GC, hard bid will definitely save you from contract price creep. Though contractors hate hard bidding jobs.
#3/4) YES! Good God Yes!
And a higher price is worth it when the job gets done on time and budget.
BTW - how does a roofer forget a roof jack and leave it on a roof? This is still bugging me.
Its a donation to you for him being a d*ck and jerking you around
Well, I've officially been screwed over by my flooring guy. He was supposed to refinish my hardwoods on Friday. He says there was a death in the family. He's going out of town, and has no idea when he'll be returning. He won't give me an estimate of when he can do the work. He's given me so many excuses so far, I don't believe a word of it. He'd already canceled several times. I told him that this weekend had to happen because I'm moving in on the 21st. We held off moving, because we wanted to get these floors finished prior to moving in. I've been chasing this guy for 2 months.
I have to move in this weekend. None of the floors are done. I have put all my furniture somewhere until I can get another guy in to do the work. The house has to be empty. I'll probably end up renting a few pods. Looks like I'll be sleeping on a mattress on the floor for a month or so.
I found another guy, but he can't do the job until the end of September. He's a younger guy with his own business. He only restores floors and woodwork in old homes. He seems to know what he's talking about. He knew wood species, and construction specifics about the house based on it's age.
I got a kick out of talking to him. His first words were "I want to let you know that I'm not a ********* contractor". Apparently he used to work for a guy who would line up work for the month, knowing he couldn't do it. The guy needed to make x dollars per month. His goal was making x dollars in the fewest number of days. He'd work until he hit that number, then he'd just stop. Anyone still in the queue got screwed over. The whole process would start over the next month. Since there were always new calls, he always had work. If he got stuck, he'd call the people he screwed over, apologize, and try to talk them into letting him do the work.
He also told me a story about his own home. He hired a roofer who showed up, tore the old roof off, and left for 3 days - no tarp. There was a huge rainstorm and his ceiling caved on. Real nice!
Ask for your money back.
And early in this thread you asked about why some bids were so much higher than others. The really high bids are what they throw out when they have more work than they need. If they are fully committed and throw out a balls to the wall ridiculous bid and someone agrees to pay it, sure. Otherwise its not them turning you down.
I am sorry you have been having such a fun time of it all.