ChelisHubby
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2014
- Messages
- 1,327
- Reaction score
- 276
At age 35 or younger No way but now that I am 55 it would make me sleep better.
Could You Live Across The Street From Your Mother?
- Thread starter mkyl428
- Start date
Help Support Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum:
I am sure I will someday live across the street from my mother
when I die and go to hell
when I die and go to hell
hio3791
Well-Known Member
Let me put things into perspective, seems like the majority of folks that would live across the street from their mom either live too far away from her or she's deceased. Guys, keep in mind, he said he's already 10 min away from his mom, I assume he sees her on a regular basis and from his comments, she's still rocking it.
Personally, I like the 1000+ mile separation I have and if my mom was to infringe into my territory, we'll pack our bags and run for the hills. But everyone's situation is different and while I respect that, your gf/wife will eventually give you a piece of her mind for being so close to her mother-in-law. And I've learned that a happy wife is a happy home. You can make your mom happy or your can live in a happy home but you can't have both!
Personally, I like the 1000+ mile separation I have and if my mom was to infringe into my territory, we'll pack our bags and run for the hills. But everyone's situation is different and while I respect that, your gf/wife will eventually give you a piece of her mind for being so close to her mother-in-law. And I've learned that a happy wife is a happy home. You can make your mom happy or your can live in a happy home but you can't have both!
The answer to your question depends a lot on your relationship with your mother.
I bought my childhood home 3 years ago and live directly behind my aunt/uncle, and one house away from my cousin and sister (roommates, we are a close family, but not THAT kind of family). We all get along and there are no problems. Having the built in housesitter is nice too.
Personally? I would have no problem with it, but my family gets along really well and respects each others space where it seems that is not the case with most families. I would look into the rationale of turning your current home into a rental property (I am currently renting out 3 bedrooms of my house and almost make up my entire mortgage with that alone. When I was/Were I to rent all 4 rooms I make money over what I pay per month).
What is your relationship like with your mother? Is she meddlesome? I know if I were to live in close proximity to mom I would get free dinner often, as well as assistance with landscaping (I happen to have a brown stick-like thumb and thats what happens to plants I try to cultivate). If you feel like living in that close of proximity to your mom would mean that she would be judging you or inconveniencing you too much, then do not do it at all. If you feel that she would respect the fact that you are an adult, then why not? Only you can decide how "Mom" she will try to be over you.
I bought my childhood home 3 years ago and live directly behind my aunt/uncle, and one house away from my cousin and sister (roommates, we are a close family, but not THAT kind of family). We all get along and there are no problems. Having the built in housesitter is nice too.
Personally? I would have no problem with it, but my family gets along really well and respects each others space where it seems that is not the case with most families. I would look into the rationale of turning your current home into a rental property (I am currently renting out 3 bedrooms of my house and almost make up my entire mortgage with that alone. When I was/Were I to rent all 4 rooms I make money over what I pay per month).
What is your relationship like with your mother? Is she meddlesome? I know if I were to live in close proximity to mom I would get free dinner often, as well as assistance with landscaping (I happen to have a brown stick-like thumb and thats what happens to plants I try to cultivate). If you feel like living in that close of proximity to your mom would mean that she would be judging you or inconveniencing you too much, then do not do it at all. If you feel that she would respect the fact that you are an adult, then why not? Only you can decide how "Mom" she will try to be over you.
Does your mother respect your boundaries? Can you tell her "no" straight to her face? Will she accept it and move on?
Because then it could work.
Have you ever had cats? Noticed how you only have to give in to them once and they expect that every time? Mothers can be like that.
Because then it could work.
Have you ever had cats? Noticed how you only have to give in to them once and they expect that every time? Mothers can be like that.
Beernik
Well-Known Member
I wish I lived closer to my mom for my daughter's sake. It's about an hour drive to get to my folk's house.
My mom had a double lung transplant 4.5 years ago. She's in good health, but it's a fragile health. Anything that makes her sick makes her really, really sick.
I know any of us could die at any time. But with her, it always lingers in my mind.
It's probably better for my parents that I don't live closer. I've had my dad over the last three days helping me with my boiler and my daughter can wear my mom out by just playing with their cat.
My mom had a double lung transplant 4.5 years ago. She's in good health, but it's a fragile health. Anything that makes her sick makes her really, really sick.
I know any of us could die at any time. But with her, it always lingers in my mind.
It's probably better for my parents that I don't live closer. I've had my dad over the last three days helping me with my boiler and my daughter can wear my mom out by just playing with their cat.
gratus fermentatio
Well-Known Member
My mom is in her 80's & lives over 2,000 miles away. I see her for a couple days about every 5 or 6 years. I'd like to be able to spend more time with her, but living across the street is really pushing it. I love her, but I think I'd feel quite a loss of privacy. Might be worth it in the long run though. Rent out your current house & use the rent to pay off the other house. Do the same thing a few years later if you feel the need to get out of there.
Regards, GF.
Regards, GF.
Over the summer I moved my family across the street from my parents. The house we moved into is a huge upgrade and it is nice having them over there. Dad usually calls before he wanders over and sometimes when I get home from work there are projects done around the house. I would not change it for anything.
Do it. Just be sure that the financial stuff is spelled out in a legal contract. And don't miss any mortgage payments!
OP
OP
She doesn't mind that I drink, or make my own beer, or illicit smoking habits I may or may not have, & doesn't (as far as I know) share my business with the rest of the family.
She doesn't really meddle, I just think it may be more tempting if I were across the street... She does like to help with things like landscaping, & cleaning, so that's a plus I suppose. She's always inviting me over for dinner, I decline a lot of the time b/c I have other things going on, that may be more difficult if I take the house....
I have considered renting my house out, but I don't know b/c I have made a lot of improvements to my current house & I would hate to rent it out & see it get trashed, where I could sell it get my equity out of it & be done with it..
I like being a slum... err landlord. Though it really all comes down to how you want to do things.
My father always told me that only suckers work to get rich. I would always weigh how the market is verses what you can 'make' by selling outright against the equity you can gain through rent with the hassle of maintaining it and keeping it rented. If it hurts to see others abuse the property, renting may not be the best idea.
I would do it and we don't always get along. The only thing I'd be worried about is the financial aspect. Is the house yours to do with as you choose? I know it will be in your name, but will you be able to do whatever you want with it? Also, are you good about paying obligations that are unenforceable? Unless your mom is going to get into the whole promissory note to ensure payment, basically you can skip out on paying whenever if you're that guy.
Either way, I'd still do it. I think helicopter mom will allow me my space.
Either way, I'd still do it. I think helicopter mom will allow me my space.
OP
OP
Yes, I will be able to do as I wish with it including selling it on down the line if thing don't work out...
Lol No, I would be able to get her paid every month, I have lived in my current house 10 years this December & have never missed a payment, it's nice to know if something came up & I couldn't pay her for some reason that I have the option of paying later without some kind of penalty or fee though...
That is more or less what I meant. With the knowledge of no penalty (late fees, dings to the credit or foreclosure/repo) sometimes people tend to get more relaxed about their payment schedules. It doesn't happen all of the time and I always think people truly intend to pay others back, but it is something to consider. More so for her than for you, of course. Also, be sure the amount you're to pay doesn't exceed the value of the home. This is still an investment and you want to protect yourself as much as I bet your mom wants to protect herself.
Sorry that it sounds all business but it kind of is. I think it's a great move and I'd do it. I don't care if my mom thinks I have a revolving door of men in my house either. My neighbors are likely more nosey than she would be.
OP
OP
I totally get looking at it from a business point of view a house is an investment, we haven't talked about what the payments would be because I haven't made a decision yet, but my mom did make a joking mention of how I likely won't pay it off before she dies
I like my mom. And I live 2000 miles away from her so I'll continue to like her.
Similar threads
