Best News Headlines

[pvpeacock]

Beavers Outlast Trojans In Overtime Thriller
http://www.osubeavers.com/news/2012/1/21/207862623.aspx

 

[HoppyDaze]

Woman arrested for defecating on boss’ desk after winning the lottery

I slowly opened the door to discover the woman with her pants around her ankles, hunched over on my desk like a hippopotamus/cheetah dropping a massive poo on my desk. She shot her head towards me and locked eyes. I was frozen in shock and fear. In my peripheral vision I saw a huge mud-monkey sliming out of her butt like a Play-Doh fun factory.

 

[nmfree]

I don't know if this should be filed under "Man Bites Dog" or "The Lonely Lives of Scientists": Scientists turn urine into beer

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Woman arrested for defecating on boss’ desk after winning the lottery

That, was AWESOME!!!
I laughed so hard it hurt!
Thanks, I needed that.
Regards, GF.

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Here's one...

 

[CoreyD]

Police: Pair stole from pawn shop owner, tried to pawn items back to him
http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime...er-tried-to-pawn-items-back-to-him/ar-BBvdrps

 

[CoreyD]

‘The stop-smoking pill made me do it': Man found not criminally responsible for shooting wife
http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime...ally-responsible-for-shooting-wife/ar-BBvqi9y

 

[KayaBrew]

F*ckin' Brits...

http://deadspin.com/no-bbc-that-is-not-a-cake-1785242777

 

[Homercidal]

F*ckin' Brits...

http://deadspin.com/no-bbc-that-is-not-a-cake-1785242777

Some good comments under that article.

 

[nmfree]

Sex pigs halt traffic after laser attack on Pokémon teens

 

[HoppyDaze]

Olympic Race Walker Craps Himself and Collapses During Event

 

[nmfree]

Police: Ohio Man, 35, Tried To Have Sex With A Red Van

 

[nmfree]

Woman accused of 'drop-kicking' cake, slapping ice cream clerk over flavor

 

[nmfree]

Pa. man armed with rotten pizza, chain and goat statue attacks police

 

[jschein]

Pa. man armed with rotten pizza, chain and goat statue attacks police

Oh no not the [emoji238] God

 

[nmfree]

Eh, this is close enough to count.

 

[WI_Wino]

Intruder Breaks Into A House – Entire Family Shoots Him

 

[nmfree]

 

[nmfree]

Man stuck pool balls up his bum just for 'banter' in pub and waved his penis at barmaid

 

[nmfree]

Tisdale, Sask., officially changes 'Land of Rape and Honey' slogan

 

[HoppyDaze]

Charleston Man Arrested For Operating a Craft Brewery Without a Beard

A Charleston man is under arrest this morning after police determined he was operating a craft brewery without a beard. Adam Hawkins was swarmed by the SWAT team and placed into custody, where he’ll be deprived of a razor, forced to wear hipster clothing, and ride a beach cruiser bicycle until he’s ready to operate his brewery under the proper codes.

 

[nmfree]

Everyone was loving Montreal’s family-friendly puppet festival until the prison rape part

 

[nmfree]

Suspended Teacher Allegedly Told Student to 'Lick Me Where I Fart' (WARNING: Autoplay)

 

[nmfree]

A mash-up of two threads:

Hen-baiting fox was a drunk and naked Swede
"Most people who have too much alcohol at a birthday party do not find themselves drunk, naked, blood-covered and trapped inside a hen house in a rural Swedish village."

 

[HoppyDaze]

Housewife Gets Revenge On ISIS For Murdering Her Entire Family By Hunting Them Down, Killing Them, And “Cooking Their Heads”

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Housewife Gets Revenge On ISIS For Murdering Her Entire Family By Hunting Them Down, Killing Them, And “Cooking Their Heads”

AWESOME!
Regards, GF.

 

[Hophunter]

http://www.foxnews.com/health/2016/...s-by-venomous-spider-for-second-time.amp.html

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Don't Spy On Mike Rowe...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry...7ea3845e4b024a52d2a62b7?section=us_weird-news

 

[Hanglow]

 

[KayaBrew]

https://www.buzzfeed.com/ishmaeldar...-over-with-h?utm_term=.epPd3LokLK#.fgXNdW2BWy

 

[gratus fermentatio]

A little old, but still a good one.

 

[HoppyDaze]

 

[DurtyChemist]

Woman arrested for defecating on boss’ desk after winning the lottery

http://www.snopes.com/woman-quits-winning-lottery/

Sorry, it's fake no matter how many times it's emailed, posted online, shared, retweeted, retold, or spread around as a rumor. It's like the story of the guy who took a wheelbarrow home every friday for 25 years from his work.

 

[DurtyChemist]

This was awesome back in 2014 too...

 

[HoppyDaze]

http://www.snopes.com/woman-quits-winning-lottery/



Sorry, it's fake no matter how many times it's emailed, posted online, shared, retweeted, retold, or spread around as a rumor. It's like the story of the guy who took a wheelbarrow home every friday for 25 years from his work.

This was awesome back in 2014 too...

Hey, you've missed the gist

 

[nmfree]

 

[Mongrel]

Headdress-Rocking Good Samaritan Was Just Trying to Get Some Weed When he Disarmed Gunman

 

[Dan65]

http://www.wftv.com/news/local/man-...truck-ends-up-in-house-troopers-say/460417999

FHP: Man leaving strip club runs over own leg; truck crashes into house

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Score one for the Pizzaman!

 

[afro_lou]

Police Officer On LSD Attempts To Save Anti-Masturbation Dolphin Mascot From Imaginary Fire

And /thread