Post the stupid things you did when drunk

[LewisM]

i'll tag in with a story that has a little something to do with too many chemicals in the bloodstream -

i was hanging out at a friend's place on a nice summer saturday night.....waiting on a another guy. we were all supposed to go down to this local bar (short walk from the house) and meet some guys we hadn't seen in a while. things got delayed and we enved up getting a pretty good head start on the drinking before we were even at the bar. after a few hours of a Smoked Porter i had brewed a few weeks before, coupled with a half a bottle of Tenoch Reposado tequila (yeehaaa!) i needed a little snack to keep the system running smoothly. my buddy pulls out a rice krispy treat - homemade - from his pack (first clue missed....who travels with homamade rice krispy treats, anyway?!!?) and i hungrily wolf it down, much to the grins of my buddies.

(editors note: a few of these guys are regular pot dudes. now, i have absolutely 0 problem with this, i just don't do it......much. regardless, in retrospect, i should have put two and two together. plus, the krispy treat tasted a little funny. clue #2 missed!!!!)

15 or so minutes later, the late friend arrives and we walk up the bar. at this point, i'm feeling like the tequila of realy having a good time in my stomach. feeling very light on the shoes!

to make a log story short, by beer #2 at the tavern my pupils were about 1/2" across, i was clutching my glass like my life depended on it and it looked like the Harpoon IPA tap handle was a dragon head that was making a weird hissin noise. bailing was essential, much to the relentless gigles of my companions.

the trek home (another long story) involved being sandpaper-thirsty, trying to drink water from a dude's sprinkler-hose, and getting chased down the street by said homeowner.

i'm not sure i can blame it on the booze, but i still consider it a good intoxicated evening!

well if we're lumping that in as well, heres a few stories:

me and 2 others managed to get about 30-40 people, cant remember exactly, singing THIS song through the middle of town.

Got dared to jump through a hedge, no biggie, dived in only to find out it was a holly bush

made out with best friends girl and got smacked clean in the nose, it bled for quite a while lol

drank a friends seman, long story short he "put" it in to a bottle of yazoo + vodka secretly and let me + 2 others drink it

jumped from a roughly 18-20 foot tree branch, didnt get up for a fair old while aparently heh.

thats about all i can think of for booze stories, as for drugging stories:

me and a few others had sneaked onto the private land of a mansion and were toking away on Salvia (google it).
one of my friends disapeared for a bit, i went to look for him and after a long, walk with lots of falling over and trees laughing at me i found him, in front of an old woman with a huge stick held in his hand like a sword.
I was pretty out of it at the time, so just laughed and left him to it.
he came back later dragging a huge hose, to put it in perspective i couldnt even lift it. he had dragged it maybe 3, 400M, through plain sight of the mansion.

After he had done that, he released a dragon that flew around the sky, chasing us around. he also released the "castle guard" who tried to catch us. im guessing now that this was security heh.

Any way, we then had a good hour or two (we had combined Salvia with weed which seems to give longer effects) chopping down imaginary enemies with swords


Another time (again, Salvia) i left my body completely, just stared down at it. a guy in a suit came up to me and walked me into my ear.
Inside my mind was a big office with loads of people working away, if i opened a filing cabinet i could see memories, was very strange heh.


Probs only story i have for weed would be the first time we tried it with a bong, was insane. We were all so ****ed we just laid down on the ground and staired at the trees, i tried to stand up at one point and couldnt move my legs lol.
Any way, we were all in this state when we hear the good ol shout of the police running down at us.
Well, lets just say that running like that is a life experience heh.


well, thats me done.

 

[Biermann]

drank a friends seman, long story short he "put" it in to a bottle of yazoo + vodka secretly and let me + 2 others drink it

DUDE, F'in GROSS!!

I think I'd cause said friend some serious bodily harm afterward.

And, for the record, my bum has been paying the price for that Habanero ALLL freakin' day.

It actually hurts to walk now (combination of caustic pepper burn and rough TP).

 

[Orpheus]

drank a friends seman, long story short he "put" it in to a bottle of yazoo + vodka secretly and let me + 2 others drink it

I once filled up a "buddy's" pint glass with piss. My other friend served it to the guy and told him it was beer. He took a big swig, smelled it, pretended like nothing ever happened and then said, "This smells like piss, I'm not drinking it!" Noble attempt at a recovery, but we all saw him drink it.

Now semen is just crossing the line!

 

[Radarbrew]

OK, went to a party, drank too much, and got hungry. The back of my buddies pickup was the only seat left for me and 2 other guys. Wound up ROARIN' down the highway threatening to shoot the next a#$ who got too close with a freakin compound bow and arrow that I found in the back. That's the best one outta all the foggies that I can dredge up. BTW, didn't shoot, and ate half a pancake at the waffle house off a plate at the next table. It was a dare, and I got a free breakfast for it.

Chemically, I smoked a bit and got lost on the way home, 4 miles away, and wound up trying to navigate by the moon. Don't ask me, it was herbal.

 

[LewisM]

DUDE, F'in GROSS!!

I think I'd cause said friend some serious bodily harm afterward.

haha, i was throwing up after he told me for a fair old while, had a wee fight afterwords but nothing much.

yea im far to friendly ^-^

 

[Beer Snob]

I can't say that I have actualy gotton drunk on beer. I usually fill up way before that happens. Southern Comfort though is another issue. The stupidist thing I had ever done was drink way too much. I have no idea what I did and was very happy that I was with someone I trusted. It was the first and only time I have no idea what happened.

 

[the_bird]

I just get really, really, REALLY silly and goofy, even moreso that my usual self, when I'm wasted. Haven't been DRUNK-drunk in ages, though, probably about three years ago. Used to drink too much back in high school, but no stories that compare to Puumba (way to raise the bar, buddy).

 

[Desert_Sky]

haha, i was throwing up after he told me for a fair old while, had a wee fight afterwords but nothing much.

yea im far to friendly ^-^

I would of got him so drunk he passed out. then tea bagged him and put a video of it on youtube

 

[Pale Ale Dale]

Got maggot down my local came home early, scraped together some ingredients for a pizza and at the last minute thought i would make one with tinned dog food on it and leave it out for my mates when they arrived home. Went to bed and the rest is history, naturally they ate the lot what can i say?

 

[the_bird]

haha, i was throwing up after he told me for a fair old while, had a wee fight afterwords but nothing much.

yea im far to friendly ^-^

I vote for brewing up a brown ale, and dry hopping one bottle with a big ol' piece of dog sh!t. Just for him.

 

[LewisM]

haha, one of the other people made a huge sign, maybe 40x40 foot with his mums mobile number followed by a nice little message

they hung it over one of the big billboards next to one of the busiest roads in our area hehe.

 

[Tom Church]

I won't even get into my chemical stories...lets just say that I used to be a DJ and used to go to a lot of raves and clubs...

Tom

 

[mmm beer]

well I feel alot better after reading these posts. Ive never drank my buddies c snot that is whacked. there would have been a beating. Holy crap I feel like my own raging alcoholism is almost mellow. lmao, good reads

 

[sudsmonkey]

Got S. faced once with some buddies in high school. We stole one of those big blue mail boxes from outside the post office and put it in the back of a pickup truck at a garage down the road. Breakin' the law!!!

I water skied on the back half of a surfboard at night once when I was blasted.

Got drunk and put an American flag at the top of a 200' antenna tower the night Desert Storm started.

My roomate from college and I used to carry a cooler of beer to the top of a big high tension electric lne tower. Had to climb between the power lines for that. We were up there once when it started to rain. All the hair on my body was standing up before I got back to the ground. A guy with the power company later told me that those lines carried 750,000 volts. It's the amperage that gets you.:rockin:

 

[LewisM]

My roomate from college and I used to carry a cooler of beer to the top of a big high tension electric lne tower. Had to climb between the power lines for that. We were up there once when it started to rain. All the hair on my body was standing up before I got back to the ground. A guy with the power company later told me that those lines carried 750,000 volts. It's the amperage that gets you.:rockin:

wow...... :S

 

[Brewpastor]

I drank some water in India once.

 

[Brewpastor]

I asked my first wife out.

 

[Brewpastor]

Blew chunks in high school band class.

 

[the_bird]

Working on your post count again, BP?

 

[Brewpastor]

Working on your post count again, BP?

Nah, I made the 1000 mark. I just keep remembering more stupid things, probably add another 1000 in this thread alone!

 

[Cheesefood]

Dear lord, you people are degenerates!

• My favorite one...anyone go to Arizona State? Me and some friends climbed up the butte, covered the A in paper towels and lighter fluid and set it on fire.
• Also at ASU, was walking home from a bar and got to a cannal. Decided that I didn't want to walk to the bridge and thought I could jump it. Ended up in the canal climbing out by using my bare knees on the concrete walls. Ouch.
• Once I made a bet that I could hold seven types of hot sauce on my tongue, one at a time. So I know the habanero hell the next day.
• A couple of times, I ended up hooking up with ugly girls.
• Had sex with a guy.
• Had a cop drive me around because I was too drunk to find my car. When we found it in a used car lot, he decided it would be better if he drove me home. I admitted to being under 21 at the time.
• Got a DUI
• Got pulled over once RAGING drunk with a girl I worked with. When the cop asked for my license, my response was "I need to find my pants". She was naked too, and had been giving me road-skull at the time.
• Drove around looking for hookers to make fun of.

 

[Orpheus]

Had sex with a guy.

Do we have to keep dragging Dude into this??

 

[rdwj]

....Had sex with a guy.

What?!?!? How?!?! Did you think it was a girl??

I know that kind of stuff is common among Cub fans, but most of them don't admit it

 

[Cheesefood]

What?!?!? How?!?! Did you think it was a girl??

Ummm....yeah. No, I knew. It was a college thing. Well, a little after college.

 

[rdwj]

Ummm....yeah. No, I knew. It was a college thing. Well, a little after college.

Gotta give you a tip of the cap for being big enough to admit it - not sure I would have.

I can't help myself - gotta ask one more question and I'll try to do it in the most PG way I can think of...

Were you Barrett or Zambrano??

 

[Chairman Cheyco]

Gotta you give you a tip of the cap for being big enough to admit it - not sure I would have.

Yeah, props to 'food, that's damn near inspiring! (Not that have anything to be inspired into talking about in that area.)

 

[Cheesefood]

Gotta you give you a tip of the cap for being big enough to admit it - not sure I would have.

I can't help myself - gotta ask one more question and I'll try to do it in the most PG way I can think of...

Were you Barrett or Zambrano??

Funny you should ask. My last name is Barrett. But I've never had an intra-scrotal hematoma.

Let me state this for the record though: I've never had semen in my mouth or any other part of my body, or on my body (except for my own). There's a couple of guys here who can't say the same thing.

You seem very interested. I'm assuming you've never had the courage to find out whether or not your gay? I know from experience that I'm not. I mean, a mouth is a mouth, but as a lot of people in this forum know, I ***LOVE*** nekkid women.

 

[Cheesefood]

Yeah, props to 'food, that's damn near inspiring! (Not that have anything to be inspired into talking about in that area.)

And not that there's anything wrong with that, right? (To quote Seinfeld.)

 

[Brewnurse]

.......avitar making sense now!.........

 

[Chairman Cheyco]

And not that there's anything wrong with that, right? (To quote Seinfeld.)

You bet. I actually had that in the post at one time but took it out. I figured it wasn't needed in this convo. :cross: