- Friends and family are often poor beer judges. I don't know about yours, but my family would tell me it was the best tasting beer ever, even if I gave them the gnarliest butter bomb ever created.
- Have you tried taking a bottle or two down to your local LHBS and see what they have to say? Maybe they can detect what your tasting and offer advice.
- I've read the whole thread and don't recall you saying what your fermentation temp is. Temp control during fermentation is key.
- What about making a simple extract batch? If it tastes the same, than you know it has nothing to do with mash/sparge/etc. If it tastes better, than at least you'll know where to look.
I've certainly been frustrated before. I've dumped a few batches myself. Is it possible that your beer is actually just fine, and that you're being a little overly critical of yourself that your brew doesn't measure up to a commercial micro? I've been there done that, so that's why I'm asking.