is this CONSIDERED lying or not?

[bob1852]

Can I be the mailman in this straight to video classic?

 

[mccumath]

It never fails to surprise me how HBT'ers will take something and run with it so very, very far.

And I am only 2 posts in to this 90 post thread (well, 3 now). These threads are so easy to come up with smart ass comments for...

And if having some good fun over these threads is wrong, I dont want to be right!

 

[MalFet]

Can I be the mailman in this straight to video classic?

That depends...how comfortable are you with a nude scene? (The story has a surprise twist ending.)

 

[mccumath]

That depends...how comfortable are you with a nude scene? (The story has a surprise twist ending.)

Has something to do with fireworks, more in the literal sense...

 

[Randar]

The cake is a lie!

Haha, shocked it took so long for that classic to appear

Can I be the mailman in this straight to video classic?

Only if, when questioned, you respond in an evasive or indirect manner that you're not sure if you are indeed, a real life mailman.

LIAR!

 

[BrewKnurd]

Can I be the mailman in this straight to video classic?

The mailman truly is a vital role in this gripping tale. OP will turn to you when he feels most alone, abandoned by his wife, betrayed by the woman that gives his wife a ride to work and her scheming husband who has the fireworks hookup, in his moment of greatest need. He will be vulnerable, hurt, angry, confused, and bewildered. If you are up to the role of providing him the consolation he requires, then I believe the role is yours to be had. Also, you will need to take him to Joe's Cabaret. I cannot stress how important this is. You must not, under any circumstances, take him to a strip club. ONLY A CABARET.

 

[Randar]

That depends...how comfortable are you with a nude scene? (The story has a surprise twist ending.)

AZ is comfortable... the rest of us would be extremely uncomfortable. :fro:

 

[BrewKnurd]

That depends...how comfortable are you with a nude scene? (The story has a surprise twist ending.)

I pondered going this route. Now that I see it so succinctly laid out before me, I feel I should have. Well played, my good man. Well played indeed.

 

[bob1852]

AZ is comfortable... the rest of us would be extremely uncomfortable. :fro:

I've nothing.

 

[Hugh_Jass]

The business model:

1) ask random question on brewing forum
2) argue semantics of question with examples dripping with hyperbole (and a letter carrier)
3) ???????????
4) profit

 

[dwarven_stout]

OP asked for the phone number of an acquaintance who supplies illegal fireworks. Wife employs a diversion and doesn't provide that number. OP doesn't get illegal fireworks.

That about sums it up.

Also, this is the best HBT troll post that I've seen in a while. I always feel a little empty when there are no trolls about.

 

[Reno_eNVy]

The business model:

1) ask random question on brewing forum
2) argue semantics of question with examples dripping with hyperbole (and a letter carrier)
3) ???????????
4) profit

Yeah, that pretty much sums up this whole thread in one handy post.

 

[Yooper]

I started skimming only after the first page or two, and I'm not trying to be a jerk or anything, but do I have this right:

OP asked for the phone number of an acquaintance who supplies illegal fireworks. Wife employs a diversion and doesn't provide that number. OP doesn't get illegal fireworks.

See, I honestly think that is all there is to it. She said she didn't have the number, to avoid a fight. If she said, "Well, I'm not giving you the number because I think fireworks, alcohol, and children is a stupid combination", that would start a fight. So she said she didn't have the number, which might be true. But she CAN get a hold of the person if she needs to.

Maybe she thinks the OP is the kind of person who gets mad easily and was trying to avoid that. Instead, taking a tiny, tiny, tiny bit of (possible) subterfuge and blowing it up into a SHE IS A LIAR! sort of proves that.

 

[MyNameIsPaul]

See, I honestly think that is all there is to it. She said she didn't have the number, to avoid a fight. If she said, "Well, I'm not giving you the number because I think fireworks, alcohol, and children is a stupid combination", that would start a fight. So she said she didn't have the number, which might be true. But she CAN get a hold of the person if she needs to.

Maybe she thinks the OP is the kind of person who gets mad easily and was trying to avoid that. Instead, taking a tiny, tiny, tiny bit of (possible) subterfuge and blowing it up into a SHE IS A LIAR! sort of proves that.

Quit makin' sense over there, Yooper! You're supposed to be in a tissy over the sexist remarks made in this thread, remember!?

 

[mmb]

She sounds hot. Is she hot?

She sounds hot.

 

[Diver165]

It doesn't sound like a lie to me. Sounds like the poster is splitting hairs and can't move on from the past. That's my sober opinion. Let me get home from work and get some quality homebrew in my system and I'll probably be saying, "dump that lyin' bitch!"

But what did you expect by airing your dirty laundry to a bunch of strangers on a beer related forum. LOL

 

[MyNameIsPaul]

She sounds hot. Is she hot?

She sounds hot.

Her knees sound pointy and she's got Teh Crazy Eyez.

 

[mmb]

Her knees sound pointy and she's got Teh Crazy Eyez.

I've been married for 12 years and dating the same women for 15.

Crazy Eyez is teh hotz!

 

[Yooper]

Quit makin' sense over there, Yooper! You're supposed to be in a tissy over the sexist remarks made in this thread, remember!?

Whoops! Sorry. Men suckz. Better?

I've been married for 12 years and dating the same women for 15.

Crazy Eyez is teh hotz!

I don't know if the women you've dated for 15 years know about the wife of 12 years, but I'd love to hear the rest of THIS story! :cross:

 

[mmb]

The woman I've dated for 15 years makes an appearance every once in a while but 12 years ago this other personality moved in.

Clearer?

 

[JeepDiver]

I've been married for 12 years and dating the same women for 15.

Crazy Eyez is teh hotz!

 

[Yooper]

The woman I've dated for 15 years makes an appearance every once in a while but 12 years ago this other personality moved in.

Clearer?

I was giving you **** because you used the plural "women" and it sounded kind of fun!

 

[Reno_eNVy]

I was giving you **** because you used the plural "women" and it sounded kind of fun!

Um I believe the proper PC spelling is "womyn"

 

[Diver165]

I dunno...thinking about it. It all sounds like a "Red Flag" to me...

SNL – Red Flag | Katabatic Digital

 

[MyNameIsPaul]

I dunno...thinking about it. It all sounds like a "Red Flag" to me...

SNL – Red Flag | Katabatic Digital

Oh man, that was great!

 

[passedpawn]

I dunno...thinking about it. It all sounds like a "Red Flag" to me...

SNL – Red Flag | Katabatic Digital

I saw that skit - so fnny

 

[Homercidal]

The Scene
The Woman: (lounges languidly on the sofa wearing a sheer negligee. The doorbell rings. Long pause. The doorbell rings again. With the agreed upon signal given, The Woman calls out, "Willkommen. Bienvenue. Welcome. C'mon in."

The door opens and The Mailman enters.

The Mailman: "I think your husband is on to us." (Ominous Music)

The Woman: "Oh don't worry about him. I told him I didn't know Mary's Number. He doesn't suspect a thing! (Reaches for remote control. The lights dim and soft music starts to play) Now come over here and give me that package!"

 

[FastAndy]

How do you plan on adding the CAPS and fireworks to the scene? Perhaps the mailman yells and bursts in flames?

 

[wildwest450]

If she makes good sammiches, she's not lying. If not, boot her.




I can't believe it took 119 post's for a sammich joke.


_

 

[BrewKnurd]

The Scene
The Woman: (lounges languidly on the sofa wearing a sheer negligee. The doorbell rings. Long pause. The doorbell rings again. With the agreed upon signal given, The Woman calls out, "Willkommen. Bienvenue. Welcome. C'mon in."

The door opens and The Mailman enters.

The Mailman: "I think your husband is on to us." (Ominous Music)

The Woman: "Oh don't worry about him. I told him I didn't know Mary's Number. He doesn't suspect a thing! (Reaches for remote control. The lights dim and soft music starts to play) Now come over here and give me that package!"

The Mailman: (leans in for the kiss, then pauses) "But wait.... isn't she on... FACEBOOK?!?!"

The Woman: (Gasps) "You're right! What are we going to do?!?"

The Mailman: "We can fix this! We can! Keep it together! We'll... we'll....... we'll tell him she changed her number on facebook!"

The Woman: "Yes! You're a genius! Now... lets get back to that special delivery!"