I am an idiot

[Leadgolem]

Nice! Were you able to overcome the quantum tunneling anomaly? If I recall, it was only one additional electron in every 800 billion or so that was causing the chip to malfunction. When that thing fails, though... well... I have a small island in one quintant of my dominion that is still so overpopulated with undead guinea frogs that I am considering unleashing a manticore to deal with it.

Even better, I managed to harness the effect to actually reinforce the commands from the chip. I managed to get the non-localized harmonic phase interactions synchronized across 12 of the relevant 14 interactive dimensions. Even with both of the remaining 2 are in absolute oppositional planes they don't come even close to overpowering the 12 synchronized planes.

Oh, forget the manticore. They won't eat the guinea frogs. I do have a self replicating nano-neutralizer for the T virus if you'd like though. They do tend to get a little over enthusiastic and start eating other things sometimes though...That reminds me, I need to get that full face prosthetic finished. I did promise I'd make him a new face...

 

[Thunder_Chicken]

Even better, I managed to harness the effect to actually reinforce the commands from the chip. I managed to get the non-localized harmonic phase interactions synchronized across 12 of the relevant 14 interactive dimensions. Even with both of the remaining 2 are in absolute oppositional planes they don't come even close to overpowering the 12 synchronized planes.

Yeah, don't even try to connect with the 13th dimension. Those stiff cats simply don't want to party, no matter how well synchronized your chip is. Damned snobs.

 

[Leadgolem]

Yeah, don't even try to connect with the 13th dimension. Those stiff cats simply don't want to party, no matter how well synchronized your chip is. Damned snobs.

If you look in a future edition of the Encyclopedia Galacticia, it says this under residents of the thirteenth dimension; "A bunch of mindless jerks who where the first with their backs against the wall when the revolution came."

 

[boydster]

Yes, I'd quite like some of your self replicating nano-neutralizers.

On another note, I've begun considering recipes including my spare manticore. The tail is a lot like lobster legs, so a nice garlic butter sauce should suffice for that. The rest can be a little tough and gamey (well, except for the sirloin, that is always a tender cut and simply needs to be slow-heated to 183,000,000 kelvin, salt and pepper to taste) and I am wondering how others have prepared it? Perhaps whole, on the rotisserie? That seems a little boring though.

 

[Leadgolem]

Yes, I'd quite like some of your self replicating nano-neutralizers.

On another note, I've begun considering recipes including my spare manticore. The tail is a lot like lobster legs, so a nice garlic butter sauce should suffice for that. The rest can be a little tough and gamey (well, except for the sirloin, that is always a tender cut and simply needs to be slow-heated to 183,000,000 kelvin, salt and pepper to taste) and I am wondering how others have prepared it? Perhaps whole, on the rotisserie? That seems a little boring though.

Yeah, slow cooking is the key with most of the manticore. They are usually old, and have lots of collagen. You need a lot of time for that to render out. I think you've been trying to cook yours to fast. You don't want to exceed the surface temperature of the sun, 5,778k, or your meat will dry out.

Manticore does make the best chili, except for the kerberos chili but who has the 2.3 million years to wait for it to render? Garlic butter sauce isn't bad, but I'd prefer some powdered dragons blood, ghost peppers, and trinitrotoluene. The gaminess doesn't exactly go away, but it does meld with the spices and form some psychotropically interesting compounds. I mean sure, humans won't survive eating it, but the flavor!

You have to be careful with the tail if you don't want your guest liquefying from the inside out during dinner. I mean, that can be entertaining, but it gets old pretty quickly. You have to either remove the poison gland, and most of the flavor, without rupturing it. Or, neutralize the highly concentrated formic acid in it. You can neutralize the acid in a few ways. The most efficient is probably with an ammonia + bleach solution. That will actually break down the protein component of the venom as well. I don't like to do that, the flavor just doesn't ever go back to normal. The best tasting is with a base, like calcium carbonate. You do need to weigh the gland so you don't over do the base addition.

Hmm, Cheezy may be a little miffed with me. I know he had a buddy that was a manticore once. He made some tasty chili...

 

[Leadgolem]

Yes, I'd quite like some of your self replicating nano-neutralizers.

I'll send you some in a null-entropy tube. Be sure to air drop it on the island withing 36 hours of arrival. Your zombie guinea pig problem should be over in about 16 hours...If the island is still there after a week the nano-neutralizers have shut themselves down on there own. If it's gone, nuke the spot where the island used to be. The EMP wave will shut down the nano's before they consume the planet.



I think.

 

[Thunder_Chicken]

If you look in a future edition of the Encyclopedia Galacticia, it says this under residents of the thirteenth dimension; "A bunch of mindless jerks who where the first with their backs against the wall when the revolution came."

Uggh...Dr. Streetmentioner willan on-have a fit as there was no use of the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Subjunctive Intentional tense in that write-up. Shoot them again.

 

[Leadgolem]

Uggh...Dr. Streetmentioner willan on-have a fit as there was no use of the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Subjunctive Intentional tense in that write-up. Shoot them again.

No, I used the bistromatic calculations model. No need for any of that nonsense, though those calculations do produce particularly bad coffee.

 

[DrunkleJon]

No, I used the bistromatic calculations model. No need for any of that nonsense, though those calculations do produce particularly bad coffee.

Try cold brewing it next time. With a coarse grind and a long soak, you can make a nice concentrate that may, if used at precisely the right concentration may help stiffen the spines of the 13th dimension jerk-wads.

If that does not work, try submerging them in hot water and serve them with real cream and the juice of sugar cane. None of that fake stuff, it really puts fiberglass in their thongs.

 

[Leadgolem]

Try cold brewing it next time. With a coarse grind and a long soak, you can make a nice concentrate that may, if used at precisely the right concentration may help stiffen the spines of the 13th dimension jerk-wads.

If that does not work, try submerging them in hot water and serve them with real cream and the juice of sugar cane. None of that fake stuff, it really puts fiberglass in their thongs.

Yeah, that might work. It should annoy them almost as much as using the finite probability machine to perform party tricks.

 

[boydster]

I'll send you some in a null-entropy tube. Be sure to air drop it on the island withing 36 hours of arrival. Your zombie guinea pig problem should be over in about 16 hours...If the island is still there after a week the nano-neutralizers have shut themselves down on there own. If it's gone, nuke the spot where the island used to be. The EMP wave will shut down the nano's before they consume the planet.

I think.

Received the tube today, but it was cracked and from what I could see with my scanning electron microscope, 23% of the colony may have escaped en route. Should I alert anyone, or do you think it would be moot?

 

[passedpawn]

Oooop look at that I am a paid member now but no longer have the heart to delete this thread

Not a paid member any more. I guess the novelty of making nonsense threads wore off. Not everyone has Cheezy's stamina and hunger for nonsense.

 

[cheezydemon3]

Not a paid member any more. I guess the novelty of making nonsense threads wore off. Not everyone has Cheezy's stamina and hunger for nonsense.

One and a TWO and a DOGS, more DOGS. Three and a four and a.........wait, what?

 

[DrunkleJon]

Elephant trumpets, with an accompaniment of gazelles playing the kazoo.

On a side note, why do you not hear of bands with kazoos anymore. The kazoo is a highly underrated musical instrument.

 

[Leadgolem]

Received the tube today, but it was cracked and from what I could see with my scanning electron microscope, 23% of the colony may have escaped en route. Should I alert anyone, or do you think it would be moot?

Hmm, oh well. I'm sure they will turn up eventually. Now I don't have to feel bad about executing that courier for sneezing to loudly.

Elephant trumpets, with an accompaniment of gazelles playing the kazoo.

On a side note, why do you not hear of bands with kazoos anymore. The kazoo is a highly underrated musical instrument.

You mean like the cow bell?

 

[cheezydemon3]

More Cow Bell??

That bastard did really sneeze though.....hope it hurt.

 

[Leadgolem]

More Cow Bell??

That bastard did really sneeze though.....hope it hurt.

He kept saying he thought he would sneeze his brains out. So I gave him some super sneezing powder. Watching that become literal was hilarious.

 

[DrunkleJon]

Hmm, oh well. I'm sure they will turn up eventually. Now I don't have to feel bad about executing that courier for sneezing to loudly.


You mean like the cow bell?
Cowbell Funk (original)

Nah, the cowbell is too overdone. Once SNL did the I need more cowbell skit it went too mainstream. If the Kazoo starts making it I am switching to wondering why the mouth harp is unappreciated.

[ame]http://youtu.be/VDnio2axqNI[/ame]

 

[Leadgolem]

Nah, the cowbell is too overdone. Once SNL did the I need more cowbell skit it went too mainstream. If the Kazoo starts making it I am switching to wondering why the mouth harp is unappreciated.

http://youtu.be/VDnio2axqNI

If the mouth harp goes mainstream I'm going to have to launch my hostile takeover of every media company on the planet immediately. I'd planned to let them start reporting the apocalypse, and do the takeover in the middle. I have my limits though.

 

[cheezydemon3]

If the mouth harp goes mainstream I'm going to have to launch my hostile takeover of every media company on the planet immediately. I'd planned to let them start reporting the apocalypse, and do the takeover in the middle. I have my limits though.

I figure that once we start for real, the 25-30 minutes of reporting before everything goes black will matter not at all.....what there is would be worth recording though, DVR will go extinct so we need a little planning.

 

[Whattawort]

If a mouth harp can cause a hostile media takeover, what would happen if I went pro with a vuvuzela??

 

[cheezydemon3]

If a mouth harp can cause a hostile media takeover, what would happen if I went pro with a vuvuzela??

Hostile takeover of a lemonade stand.

 

[WesleyS]

Hostile takeover of a lemonade stand.

Stay away from my lemonade stand!!

 

[Whattawort]

Hostile takeover of a lemonade stand.

As long as I can still play with my ensembles at the stadiums.

 

[Leadgolem]

I figure that once we start for real, the 25-30 minutes of reporting before everything goes black will matter not at all.....what there is would be worth recording though, DVR will go extinct so we need a little planning.

Didn't I tell you? The Dimensional Uniform Mutlimedia Printer will make that unnessary. It will take a complete reality recording of the earth for the year or so preceding and following the takeover. That way we can play back those moments at any time and savor the sweet sweet victory as many times as we like.

After a year or so, with the mandatory implantaton program in place, we can just us the Bionic Origination Recording Bank. That will record all of the experiences of all the participants for posterity.

I know, I know, it's a lot of data. The compression algorithms should be done well before the initial recording starts.

As long as I can still play with my ensembles at the stadiums.

Oh those? I thought ahead. I've already got small homing missiles that target the sound. Go ahead and play as loud as you want.



Hmmm.... Perhaps I do think to much. I've got targeting systems for the satellite mounted assassination weapons that can target people based on favorite color...

 

[DrunkleJon]

Didn't I tell you? The Dimensional Uniform Mutlimedia Printer will make that unnessary. It will take a complete reality recording of the earth for the year or so preceding and following the takeover. That way we can play back those moments at any time and savor the sweet sweet victory as many times as we like.

After a year or so, with the mandatory implantaton program in place, we can just us the Bionic Origination Recording Bank. That will record all of the experiences of all the participants for posterity.

I know, I know, it's a lot of data. The compression algorithms should be done well before the initial recording starts.

Oh those? I thought ahead. I've already got small homing missiles that target the sound. Go ahead and play as loud as you want.



Hmmm.... Perhaps I do think to much. I've got targeting systems for the satellite mounted assassination weapons that can target people based on favorite color...

But won't your array just recreate the mouth harps, banjos and bagpipes that cause the destruction of the world anyways? won't they just cause a recursive world ending loop where civilization dies over and over and over again? Or will the resurrections be piecemeal and not bring back the unworthy like Miley Citrus and the Hanson whatever the hell they are?

 

[Leadgolem]

But won't your array just recreate the mouth harps, banjos and bagpipes that cause the destruction of the world anyways? won't they just cause a recursive world ending loop where civilization dies over and over and over again? Or will the resurrections be piecemeal and not bring back the unworthy like Miley Citrus and the Hanson whatever the hell they are?

Oh, no recursive world shadowing. It's a recording, not the real thing. The data will be present if you wanted to recreate anything, but not the reality. The main output format is just audio visual.

Don't worry about any paradox problems, I learned my lesson after I divided zero for the Atlantians...

 

[DrunkleJon]

Oh, no recursive world shadowing. It's a recording, not the real thing. The data will be present if you wanted to recreate anything, but not the reality. The main output format is just audio visual.

Don't worry about any paradox problems, I learned my lesson after I divided zero for the Atlantians...

Ah, Selective recreation. Should be interesting. Though definitely watch out for the vampire sidekicks. Although oh so necessary they will really mooch your booze and encourage you to recreate the end. Tricksy buggers they.

 

[Leadgolem]

Ah, Selective recreation. Should be interesting. Though definitely watch out for the vampire sidekicks. Although oh so necessary they will really mooch your booze and encourage you to recreate the end. Tricksy buggers they.

Smegging vampire sidekicks! I swear one of them stole my last bottle of dragons blood wine. I'd been saving that since the last global apocalypse!

 

[DrunkleJon]

Smegging vampire sidekicks! I swear one of them stole my last bottle of dragons blood wine. I'd been saving that since the last global apocalypse!

Yet they are nothing compared to the penguins. You can not trust them buggers. They are the ones responsible for finishing your drink when you are not paying attention. Even worse they like to take the last beer that you are saving for a special occasion too. Honestly. I would pick the vamp sidekicks over them any day.