HBT Official Memorable Quotes Thread

[Revvy]

Revvy, that saliva quote was from the GaP thread. And Freezeblade is right, everything is funnier out of context.

Oh I know, look at the quote I did on deathbrewer yesterday....

 

[NWernBrewer]

By JustDave:

My wife's bombs got bigger after going on the pill. :rockin:

 

[Revvy]

I just had to memorialize another from the infamous "Die Code Monkeys" thread.

Rats do not eat nyt sofa. I already said that . I also siad sthat is is nice. I ti s.!

My niechbors all like me. we are all friends and brew buddies and throw darts not even at each oter. The code monkey even said that cone comp,ain. He just wrote tehviolation becauaes sofa is :unsightly".

I told him when he saiud plastic was OK that buckes were plastic, he said, put buckets then. I did!!!!Tsody he put a note on my sdoor that said CORRECETD and that I had a great sence og humor! i have noth notes in my window. on th eindse so he cannnot take them down.

My pretty pttty sofa is in ashrine built in my back yeard with no permit because it is not a perminent construction. and you know what lese>?? I aint getting a permit to move mt liitle fence wither!
oh and my neighbot who helpe dme mone ncie sofa to shrine founf a bullet SKS in it and he has one too! he said they only left note because of bullets. they were afraid and maybe thye call bomb sqwad for ordinance disposal next time! ilk dispose of ordianace ok! BANMASNSNBASASNANBAMABAMAB!

This line in particular

My niechbors all like me. we are all friends and brew buddies and throw darts not even at each oter.

 

[wildwest450]

If you think this is an EPIC Fail...You haven't been around me for very long.

Sums up my entire existence.

 

[Donasay]

On star san...

Nope. The foam is made of Happiness, and Happiness is allowed in the Reinheitsgebot.

 

[Revvy]

Ohhhhhh this is soooo good!!!!

Hummm....If I could grow some ****ies...?

And the whole darn thing is quoteworthy...

Hummm....I make my own beer....I cook my own food.....I pay my own Bills....If I could grow some ****ies...there would be no need for SWMBO? Just Kidding and in case she ever figures out how to log onto HBT.com....I Love My Wife Very much.

 

[Revvy]

Bwahahahaha!!!

PS. You aren't anywhere near Glossop are you? If so, I would like to hire you to give my brother a kick in the nutsacks.

 

[Evan!]

Bwahahahaha!!!

Hmm...so is the multiple-nutsacks thing a birth defect?

 

[ohiobrewtus]

Hmm...so is the multiple-nutsacks thing a birth defect?

I don't know, but the ladies sure love it!

 

[Evan!]

I don't know, but the ladies sure love it!

aww, hell yeah...one for slapping against each cheek. :rockin:

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

Hmm...so is the multiple-nutsacks thing a birth defect?

Never bought a heavy object in a store and the assistant asked you about double-bagging?..... Well, that's just lady code for what they really want!....... OhioBrewtus is right. The ladies love it!

 

[The Beer Baron]

Just popped up in Evans thread....nice one:rockin:

Anyone out there trying to convert tailgaters with a magnetic christian fish? I have a machine gun mounted on my hood.

 

[Revvy]

Man, the 'brit is creeping up on the Even in sheer quotable lunacy....

Your mission, should you choose to accept it:

My Brother's local is the Hare and Hounds at the top of a stonking great hill. I will Paypal $100 to the Landlord so he can pay you when your mission is accomplished.

The best time to catch my brother is Sunday lunchtime. He will enter the pub from the car park entrance. He will be accompanied by a skinny little twonk wearing glasses. My brother will be the guy imediately behind him keeping a safe "I'm not buying the first round" distance. It will first be necessary to somehow divert his right hand away from his crotch area before you can get a really good kick in (He will be scratching his balls)

Good luck. This forum will self destruct in 5 seconds.

 

[ohiobrewtus]

I lol'd at this...

And we all know Corona is miles away from ordinary. They're unfortunately down the road, past the village of Suck, and are next door neighbors to "asstastic"

 

[McKBrew]

I lol'd at this...

Holy shizzit, that is funny.

 

[McKBrew]

I'm bad about overthinking stuff, so trust me when I say you are WAY overthinking this. I could teach my 4yr old to bottle with a BMBF. And even if I'm straight up lying to you, you're out about $3.00 and can still buy a Blichmann.

I thought it was funny.

 

[The Beer Baron]

I'm bored at work, and I cam across this gem.

When asked what was brewing on humpday:

Does drinking homebrew count? How about drinking homebrew whilst playin with my balls?
Isn't that what Wednesdays are for, anyway?

Well, no! Tempted as I am, Wednesdays I prefer to drink homebrew and play with my OWN balls. Thanks anyway.

 

[RiverSwillBeer]

When asked about the new feature "Groups" and if there are any guidelines ...

When adding a club.

Does it specifically have to be about Jeeps?

 

[98EXL]

I told my wife that there was a rumor John Madden got an erection that day; she replied, "What, is Brett Favre coming back?"

Awesome!!!

 

[Freezeblade]

Problem number one, you are obviously fermenting with your carboy on its side in a zero gravity enviroment, I'm not sure what affect that may have on the yeast.

10 characters

 

[Revvy]

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!

:rockin: He should be your Trub Monkey and help clean up after sessions.

 

[BigKahuna]

Ok, so this isn't funny or anything like a lot of the quotes here, but It's something we all forget (Except for EVAN!), and seem to need reminded of.

each method of home brewing does have its own place in the hobby.

 

[DeathBrewer]

This one...

Even ice cold it just tastes like a rabid monkey took time off from playing in elephant dung to piss in my mouth!!

 

[BigKahuna]

I think we need a sub thread for the sweat and urine related quotes.

Chaucer's mead is an excellent example of a widely available mead...that tastes like the sweat off a mule's taint.

 

[Redweasel]

This had me laughing my ass of this morning.

Dude, it's bedtime. I know you want to be teabagged, but that won't help you sleep at all.

 

[BigKahuna]

do what Kahuna says and you'll be alright

Well....Dangit....Nobody else was going to put it here.

 

[Joe C]

Talking to Soperbrew about some things on HBT...

Soperbrew: to me it's just another unused option on hbt
Soperbrew: kinda like the Search function, lol

 

[Freezeblade]

The best soak for a carboy after a long week of fermenting is a long hot soak in the tub with mineral salts and some Mr. Bubble. Put on some Celtic folk music and maybe light some lavender candles.





What?

wow, just....wow

 

[Rezilynt]

Or do what Kahuna says and youll be alright

Well....Dangit....Nobody else was going to put it here.

Big K - That's because this is the memorable quotes thread, not the hilariously funny, make you cry thread

 

[Rezilynt]

Gee, ya make sticky status, and then your spent.

must be married or over 40 to appreciate