Funny things you've overheard about beer

[DrunkleJon]

Please tell me you set them all straight

 

[mattd2]

Just heard from an LHBS guy talking to a couple new brewers "Don't ever leave your beer in the primary for more than a week or ten days; always use a secondary. And stay away from the internet." sigh.

That is the best bit!
And if you miss the 1 week do you have to sit tight through day 8 & 9

 

[JonM]

It was a rare dud from the guys and gals at my LHBS, who always have solid advice for me and for the noobs.

But it was a pretty freakin' big dud.

 

[n240sxguy]

Recently heard from one of those "Know it all" rednecks that you can tell a good beer by how many IBUs (pronounced 'ee-boos') it has. He then asked me what kinds of beer I like in which I just told him PBR because it wasn't worth my time.

I live in KY, pretty much redneck heaven, and I've never met a single person who knows what an IBU is!

 

[biochemedic]

Just heard from an LHBS guy talking to a couple new brewers "Don't ever leave your beer in the primary for more than a week or ten days; always use a secondary. And stay away from the internet." sigh.

Well, can you blame him? If his customers started actually reading, they wouldn't need his <bad> advice!!!

 

[skw]

I wasn't sure because I normally only spend maybe 2-3 days at my uncle's there, then spend a week in southern Bavaria (Munich, Neu Ulm, etc), where Radler are everywhere.

Neu-Ulm is my hometown! Should you find yourself in that area again, visit Genuss-Pur in Reutti, they have a nice 200L brewery.

 

[skw]

My wife, who loves radlers, but not a beer fan. Said yesterday that the radler tastes best over ice.
:shakes head:

Drinking radlers is OK, borderline, but OK.
But over ice!!!

After I stopped laughing, I told her "That's going on the internet"

Nothing wrong with Radler. The best breweries in Bavaria have Radler on their menus (try Augustiner as Radler). I also drink my homebrew as Radler occasionally. Nothing better on a hot summer day.

Now, non-alcoholic Radler made with artificial sweeteners sold as sports drinks ("it's got electrolytes!"), that's not beer any more.

 

[JimmytheGeek]

I live in KY, pretty much redneck heaven, and I've never met a single person who knows what an IBU is!

I'll second that! I live about an hour and a half from you, and my bro is a Marshall County transplant.

 

[coolharry]

We're doing our annual family get together/Christmas and most of the family went out to dinner at Sprechers in lake geneva. We grabbed a few tables in the bar and were having a few pre-dinner brews and as the bartender is going around for drink orders she gets to my cousin:
Cousin: I'll start with a water please.
Bartender: So, a bud light?

She got a great tip.

 

[n240sxguy]

I'll second that! I live about an hour and a half from you, and my bro is a Marshall County transplant.

Who is he? I live in Marshall County.

 

[amfukuda]

My buddy just tried my bock. And said that wasn't bad I was expecting a bunch of hops and ipas to jump out at me. Granted he knows nothing about beer but I still found it funny

 

[maynardtl8]

My buddy just tried my bock. And said that wasn't bad I was expecting a bunch of hops and ipas to jump out at me. Granted he knows nothing about beer but I still found it funny

Mmmmm this lager tastes like it has a lot of IPAs in it. Are you sure you did it right? Lol

 

[gometz]

Funny thing... I feel like I'm going crazy because I'm trying to keep the TV down to let SWMBO sleep, but I have a carboy in the hallway closet (normally don't, but need a dark cool place to keep it and all others are full) and the bubbles are driving me crazy!!!

Is that funny enough?

 

[ChshreCat]

At the beer distributor this weekend, buying a case of Victory Hop Devil. A moderately drunk but very friendly guy buying a keg of Mossehead......

Him- "How can you drink that stuff, its so bitter"
Me- "I love it"
Him-"I gotta say you gotta be a real man to enjoy drinking that"
Me-"My wife loves it"
Him-<embarrassed smile>

The other people in line thought it was pretty funny

I think he was smiling because he was trying to imagine which one of you gets to be on top.

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

My buddy just tried my bock. And said that wasn't bad I was expecting a bunch of hops and ipas to jump out at me. Granted he knows nothing about beer but I still found it funny

Mmmmm this lager tastes like it has a lot of IPAs in it. Are you sure you did it right? Lol

I usually just put one IPA in my lager

Sidenote: I have a family member who used to think AIDS was the plural form of a disease called AID.

 

[dkwolf]

Had another one last night. A buddy was over looking at my basement (he's going to help me finish the remodel), and after giving him a 4-pack of the cider I just finished, pulled out a bottle of a bavarian hefe I had brewed a year ago. Something had gone horribly, horribly wrong with it and it is flat out undrinkable - but I haven't dumped it yet, thinking *maybe* it'll age out and get better. (Aside: no luck yet. Think it's time to dump it...)

Cracked the bottle to check it and offered him a sample. (The fact that he was able to swipe a finger through the foam slowly building out of the top of the bottle probably isn't a good sign for the beer). His comment?

"Did you make this with barley or hops?" - as if it's an either/or question. I just smiled. In his defense, he's JUST starting to branch out past Budweiser.

 

[prohl84]

Last night my neighbor and I were discussing the difference between nursing and savoring beer because I told him a BMC drinker (also a frat BRO) once accused me of nursing an imperial stout- as if one pint of impy isn't worth ten bud lights! He laughed and said you could nurse a BMC because as soon as it warms up about two degrees it starts to taste pretty undrinkable. Savoring is when it still tastes good. His wording contained a few colorful euphemisms.

I admit I have nursed BMC at family parties where that is the only available beer in order to prevent my family members from trying to feed them to me all night. Some of my in laws kind of see all malt beers as some sort of froofy gimmick. As though flavorful, assertive beers aren't very masculine.

 

[mattd2]

...Some of my in laws kind of see all malt beers as some sort of froofy gimmick...

At least they know that BMC isn't all malt - I tried to tell someone drinking a Budweiser that it also had rice in it, he wouldn't believe me so I told him to read the label on his bottle to me... he was surpised to say the least

 

[BeerGrylls]

pulled out a bottle of a bavarian hefe I had brewed a year ago. Something had gone horribly, horribly wrong with it and it is flat out undrinkable ...
Cracked the bottle to check it and offered him a sample...
In his defense, he's JUST starting to branch out past Budweiser.

Yeah, that'll motivate him away from the crap.. Haha

 

[FatDragon]

Some of my in laws kind of see all malt beers as some sort of froofy gimmick. As though flavorful, assertive beers aren't very masculine.

That's my uncle. He lives within walking distance of the Sierra Nevada brewery and drinks Budweiser exclusively because beer isn't supposed to be about enjoyment, it's an alcohol delivery method, nothing more or less.

Why Budweiser specifically? Ya gotta buy Amurrican! None of these froofy imports like Sierra Nevada, Sam Adams, or New Belgium!

 

[Trippel-A]

My Dad saw a picture of a stack of cases of Two Brothers on my Facebook profile, and he said something about not drinking girly beers in his day. I asked why he thought they were girly, and basically he was inferring "girly" from "fancy" or just "not working class BMC swill."

As I learned in the conversation "girly" really just meant "not PBR," so I enjoyed telling him that PBR has been taken over by hipsters.

 

[dkwolf]

Yeah, that'll motivate him away from the crap.. Haha

In my defense, I explained to him ahead of time that something had gone sideways with the brew, and I was waiting to see if it would age out. I had no intention of drinking the bottle I opened, just wanted to check it. Popped the cap, took a whiff (picked up the same "medicine" type aroma that I've been hoping would go away). When it started foaming up out the top of the neck, I swiped some of the foam with a finger to taste it, and he did the same.

Interestingly enough, I had not told him what style of beer it was, and he picked up the wheat profile right away. Guy has potential.

 

[all_about_stouts]

I'm sure this has already been posted, but since I haven't read through the 489 pages, I'll post it anyway (first post!).

I once gave my girlfriend's dad a Guinness Draught. He made a big deal about it and said that he drank one once and nearly got drunk because those dark beers are so strong. He poured it into a glass to show me how dark it was lol. Little did he know, it has similar ABV to one of the BMCs he's so fond of.

 

[troy2000]

In my defense, I explained to him ahead of time that something had gone sideways with the brew, and I was waiting to see if it would age out. I had no intention of drinking the bottle I opened, just wanted to check it. Popped the cap, took a whiff (picked up the same "medicine" type aroma that I've been hoping would go away). When it started foaming up out the top of the neck, I swiped some of the foam with a finger to taste it, and he did the same.

Interestingly enough, I had not told him what style of beer it was, and he picked up the wheat profile right away. Guy has potential.

They'll surprise you sometimes. I was bottling a batch of Channel66's Shipwrecked Saison (see recipe page) yesterday, and gave a warm and uncarbonated taste of it to a young kid I work with. His idea of spiffy beer is Michelob Ultra-something, but he thought for a minute and said, "kind of reminds me of Shocktop, but it needs some orange flavor in it."

On the plus side, he managed to draw a connection between two Belgian-style ales with wheat in them. On the down side, it'll be a frosty day in my hometown before I start adding orange peel to my beers....

 

[RM-MN]

They'll surprise you sometimes. I was bottling a batch of Channel66's Shipwrecked Saison (see recipe page) yesterday, and gave a warm and uncarbonated taste of it to a young kid I work with. His idea of spiffy beer is Michelob Ultra-something, but he thought for a minute and said, "kind of reminds me of Shocktop, but it needs some orange flavor in it."

On the plus side, he managed to draw a connection between two Belgian-style ales with wheat in them. On the down side, it'll be a frosty day in my hometown before I start adding orange peel to my beers....

I can send you some of that frosty day. The temperature here is -26, wind chill is -60. Do you have the orange peel on hand or will I have to wait to send the frosty while you go out and get some?

 

[unionrdr]

Well,at least he got the Belgian part right. That's something. It's 18F here with wind chill warnings. The wind's howling around the house & trees like a lost soul atm. So much for geting the car towed to a shop for repairs today.
I'm gettin too old for this shiz...

 

[amfukuda]

I can send you some of that frosty day. The temperature here is -26, wind chill is -60. Do you have the orange peel on hand or will I have to wait to send the frosty while you go out and get some?

You just made me feel like a little girl it's 28 here and I'm freezing

 

[masonsjax]

The temperature here is -26, wind chill is -60.

That's not funny. You need to move.

 

[RM-MN]

That's not funny. You need to move.

To where? Somewhere in Canada?

 

[bleme]

I can send you some of that frosty day. The temperature here is -26, wind chill is -60. Do you have the orange peel on hand or will I have to wait to send the frosty while you go out and get some?

I know it is not funny and off topic, but that's what this thread is right???

Anyway, when I lived in Fairbanks, my favorite time to go cross country skiing was -25F because I wasn't very good and fell down a lot. At -25F, the snow would stay frozen and just brush off so I actually stayed warmer. Good times. I wish SWMBO wasn't such a pansy.