Funny things you've overheard about beer

[KeyWestBrewing]

I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard. And he clearly wasn't joking either.

 

[b-boy]

I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard. And he clearly wasn't joking either.

When I was in college the rumour was that Miller added formaldehyde to preserve their beer so they could use clear bottles. the rumour was probably started by Budweiser. I wouldn't drink Miller for years.

 

[RCCOLA]

Heineken is the beer with the highest concentration of acetaldehyde in it. And that is a serious flaw with their fermentation process.

FTFY to make it a true statement.
Unbelievable that many people think it's a drinkable product.

 

[br1dge]

Been in NC for two years now. Still can't handle NC "BBQ". It might be growing on me a little, but it isn't BBQ... Not like I know it. KC, Memphis, Texas... All great but Carolina is different... Prob a topic for another meaningless debate thread.

Can't beat a smith fields sandwich and large sweet tea

 

[bleme]

He said no just mix a stout and an ipa. Strange people

Black Eyes (Stout & IPA mix) are pretty popular in my area.

 

[russrob81]

9:00am Sunday a few years ago

Charlotte airport restaurant/bar
Gentleman (with sunglasses on inside) walks up to bar
Waitress (with nice southern accent): "what can I get you darlin"
Gentleman:" I'll have a bud light"
Waitress: "sorry I can't serve that yet"
Gentleman(a little annoyed): "what do you mean"
Waitress: "state law no alcohol until noon on Sunday"
Gentleman (more annoyed): "what the f*** is that"
Waitress: "NC law says you can't buy alcohol until noon on Sundays"
Gentleman (starting to get mad): "$&@?!#%£€¥*^!!!!"
Waitress: "sir you need to calm down"
Gentleman (full on temper tantrum): "$&@!!?)(/:&;82&,8*{!~*#'sodkt"
Waitress: "if you don't calm down I'm going to call the police"
Gentleman: "F*** your g**d**** f****** state and your g**d*** f****** bulls*** rules" then storms out of restaurant
Made everyone's breakfast show worth while

 

[gcdowd]

9:00am Sunday a few years ago

Charlotte airport restaurant/bar
Gentleman (with sunglasses on inside) walks up to bar
Waitress (with nice southern accent): "what can I get you darlin"
Gentleman:" I'll have a bud light"
Waitress: "sorry I can't serve that yet"
Gentleman(a little annoyed): "what do you mean"
Waitress: "state law no alcohol until noon on Sunday"
Gentleman (more annoyed): "what the f*** is that"
Waitress: "NC law says you can't buy alcohol until noon on Sundays"
Gentleman (starting to get mad): "$&@?!#%£€¥*^!!!!"
Waitress: "sir you need to calm down"
Gentleman (full on temper tantrum): "$&@!!?)(/:&;82&,8*{!~*#'sodkt"
Waitress: "if you don't calm down I'm going to call the police"
Gentleman: "F*** your g**d**** f****** state and your g**d*** f****** bulls*** rules" then storms out of restaurant
Made everyone's breakfast show worth while

Haha gotta appease the church folks.

 

[Lushife]

9:00am Sunday a few years ago

Charlotte airport restaurant/bar
Gentleman (with sunglasses on inside) walks up to bar
Waitress (with nice southern accent): "what can I get you darlin"
Gentleman:" I'll have a bud light"
Waitress: "sorry I can't serve that yet"
Gentleman(a little annoyed): "what do you mean"
Waitress: "state law no alcohol until noon on Sunday"
Gentleman (more annoyed): "what the f*** is that"
Waitress: "NC law says you can't buy alcohol until noon on Sundays"
Gentleman (starting to get mad): "$&@?!#%£€¥*^!!!!"
Waitress: "sir you need to calm down"
Gentleman (full on temper tantrum): "$&@!!?)(/:&;82&,8*{!~*#'sodkt"
Waitress: "if you don't calm down I'm going to call the police"
Gentleman: "F*** your g**d**** f****** state and your g**d*** f****** bulls*** rules" then storms out of restaurant
Made everyone's breakfast show worth while

Wow, what a shower bag.

 

[KeyWestBrewing]

He didn't have to be a ******* about it. But I personally think that law is ridiculous and if I were from another country and traveling and was told I couldn't have a drink because it wasn't noon yet, this one day out of the week, I'd feel upset about the illogic of it all. It's a religious based law which goes against the separation of church and state IMO. But again....... He still didn't have to throw a temper tantrum about it. If your old enough to drink like an adult you should be old enough to act like an adult.

 

[Lushife]

He didn't have to be a ******* about it. But I personally think that law is ridiculous and if I were from another country and traveling and was told I couldn't have a drink because it wasn't noon yet, this one day out of the week, I'd feel upset about the illogic of it all. It's a religious based law which goes against the separation of church and state IMO. But again....... He still didn't have to throw a temper tantrum about it. If your old enough to drink like an adult you should be old enough to act like an adult.

I know it's religious based but they find a way around that. Here in NJ you can't buy liquor to take home after 10pm I don't think it's a religion based law but its the law and we have to follow and show did this f***.

 

[nmfree]

Psh, I live in Portland. They're back to drinking PBR again, but this time its ironic.

Trucker hat wearing hipsters were drinking PBR "ironically" the first time around, so what would that make it now?

"Oh I can't drink beer. It's too strong" as she pours another very large glass of 14% wine before moving onto the good brandy.

There's a tavern that I go to occasionally where a few of the women regulars (I've never seen or heard of any men that do this) get their 6oz. glasses of Miller Lite with ice, because "the straight beer is too strong for me".

 

[Lushife]

Trucker hat wearing hipsters were drinking PBR "ironically" the first time around, so what would that make it now?

There's a tavern that I go to occasionally where a few of the women regulars (I've never seen or heard of any men that do this) get their 6oz. glasses of Miller Lite with ice, because "the straight beer is too strong for me".

Wow! Why don't they just drink seltzer with a thimble of vodka?

 

[KeyWestBrewing]

I know it's religious based but they find a way around that. Here in NJ you can't buy liquor to take home after 10pm I don't think it's a religion based law but its the law and we have to follow and show did this f***.

That's lame. Our liquor stores close at 12am and bars are open till 4am.

 

[libeerty]

Sorry but that's rubbish.

Whilst I'm always reluctant to quote Wikipedia the sources cited in this are sound.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porter_(beer)

The mentions of mixes have been fairly conclusively repudiated by multiple sources. Sorry.

http://beeradvocate.com/articles/305

 

[Lushife]

That's lame. Our liquor stores close at 12am and bars are open till 4am.

Yeah liquor stores here close at ten unless they are a bar/liquor store.

 

[highgravitybacon]

FTFY to make it a true statement.
Unbelievable that many people think it's a drinkable product.

Do you have a source? Lots of people like Heinekin, so it sounds like a matter of personal preference.

 

[Lushife]

Ftfy?

 

[morticus]

Ftfy?

I think it means fixed that for you. Not sure though.

 

[SiriusStarr]

Trucker hat wearing hipsters were drinking PBR "ironically" the first time around, so what would that make it now?

Meta-irony. The point is that since hipsters used to drink PBR and don't anymore, it is now meta-ironic for a hipster to consume it.

 

[Onihige]

Not exactly beer related, but close enough I suppose.

I was returning a bottle of mead that I had gotten as a gift. I had saved the bottle for a while, but when I started to hear bad reviews and even worse - the meadery had gone public with that it had been a failed batched, I tried it.

It had fermented in the bottle, which was potentially dangerous, and it tasted sour. So I headed to the store, explained that there was a co2 build up in the bottle and etc.

"Mead all meads are fizzy." - Corrected him, and later walked home with money back for the mead AND extra for the trips, which was more than the mead itself. Naturally, I bought some honey and yeast on my way home instead.

Moral of the story: make your own presents!

Heard a bunch of other stupid stuff about mead too. This one is a personal favorite: "No, thanks. I don't want to try mead, I'm worried people will think I'm a racist."

 

[bergen69]

Not exactly beer related, but close enough I suppose.

I was returning a bottle of mead that I had gotten as a gift. I had saved the bottle for a while, but when I started to hear bad reviews and even worse - the meadery had gone public with that it had been a failed batched, I tried it.

It had fermented in the bottle, which was potentially dangerous, and it tasted sour. So I headed to the store, explained that there was a co2 build up in the bottle and etc.

"Mead all meads are fizzy." - Corrected him, and later walked home with money back for the mead AND extra for the trips, which was more than the mead itself. Naturally, I bought some honey and yeast on my way home instead.

Moral of the story: make your own presents!

Heard a bunch of other stupid stuff about mead too. This one is a personal favorite: "No, thanks. I don't want to try mead, I'm worried people will think I'm a racist."

Racist? What...they think you hate people from the middle ages?

 

[bergen69]

There is a local bar/restaurant "REDS" and their slogan is "no crap on tap", so no BMC in the building! I love sitting at the bar and having "Billy Bob" order a bud light or a silver bullet and being told that they don't have that. A few months ago Iowa got Stone in the state so it was on special..

.Billy-"Give me a MGD"
Waitress-"sorry we don't serve that...the beer menu is on the table...or our specials are on the chalk boards"
Billy-"what's with the Stone thing?"
Waitress-"oh their a great brewery from North County San Diego, we just started serving them, would you like to try one?
Billy-" what's like MGD?"
Waitress-"umm...maybe their pale ale but it's has more hop flavor and more body". (actually my salad had more hop flavor and body than MGD)
Billy-"nah...give me an arrogant bastard that sounds like my kind of beer"
Waitress (quoting the label...)" I don't think you will like it..."
Billy-(getting a bit annoyed with her trying to help)" just bring me the beer"
Waitress-" normal or Oaked?"
Billy-"Jesus! Just being me a damn beer!"
Waitress-" ok ill be right back"

Billy (with a pint of AB in front of him)" man that's dark beer" (takes a big swig) "oh that's awful!"

I encourage him to take his time...let it warm up a bit...by the end of the glass he started actually being able to taste what beer is supposed to be like!

I gave the waitress a big tip...she was the greatest. Easy on the eyes also....I think she is an economy major.

 

[EnjoyGoodBeer]

Nectar of the gods.

Mead

 

[EnjoyGoodBeer]

I had a neighbor once that used to plant her flowers in a 2 piece bikini. All the guys in the neighborhood would almost simultaneously came out with a beer to sit on their front porch. I'm not convinced she knew what she was doing, but was sure her husband did with all the evil looks he gave us

Nice, Id drink a beer to that.

 

[sirmichael]

From Women's Health Magazine about Guiness and other light beers.

 

[hoppyhoppyhippo]

I'm drinking light beer cause I'm on a diet

D'oh!

 

[andycr]

That's actually far less misinformation about Guinness than I usually hear. It's as low in calories as many "light" beers...

 

[Vellum]

Isn't mgd 64 the lowest Cal beer so Guinness at 125 is about double. Just kind of off since when most people think of low Cal beers they don't often jump ti the lowest.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

"You can't brew beer if you have a septic tank. The yeast will ferment everything in there & create poisonous gas" another gem from an old coworker.

 

[unionrdr]

Reminds me of the time when the city & some cops showed up at the storm drain where my septic line runs out to. The caker is at that point as well. I guess someone smelled something "off". I explained to them that I flush my used yeast,starsan,& pbw into the toilet. They said that was it! I then proceeded to explain to them that starsan is a food grade sanitizer,likewise with PBW as a food grade brewery wash. Not to mention the yeast would eat the shizz in the caker & clear it out a little. Not a word since then. But I'm the only smoker near the openning,& I know better than to pull the Christmas Vacation scene!...