Don't Drink Beer

[Rempo]

What are your three favorite nonce words from Jabberwocky? Have you ever used the word lupid?

 

[xnicknj]

Do you find brewers appreciate or find the humor in these video reviews or are the majority of them experiencing the bent acorn penis feels we've heard so much about?

Also, how has there been multiple Square/FF references and no love for FFVII? I dont get to play many RPGs anymore but that was always my favorite.

 

[jbuddle]

Damnit, I tried to warn you all. From the second I witnessed jbuddle fail like a pre-tween girl at chugging four loko I knew the sumbitch couldn't be trusted.



Srs







LYMI, but srs.

Everyone already knows I'm the worst.

 

[Stubs]

Easily my favorite of your work.

yourewelcome.gif

I get about 8% of the jokes here and in this thread but I laughed so hard at this I cried.

 

[drgarage1]

I get about 8% of the jokes here and in this thread but I laughed so hard at this I cried.

Landtappd is what really makes it.

 

[jbuddle]

Landtappd is what really makes it.

It was a confusing situation, as you can see, and I'm just glad dontdrinkbeer captured all the drama so succinctly.

 

[drgarage1]

I have to say, you kind of lost me with the latest video review. I'm still a fan, but growing concerned about your well-being.

 

[stakem1]

Is that really your voice?

Who is responsible for sending you a Selinsgrove glass?

I am search function retarded...have you ever experienced the sweet nectars that come from selinsgrove brewing?

**** you.

Lets kiss.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Is that really your voice?

Who is responsible for sending you a Selinsgrove glass?

I am search function retarded...have you ever experienced the sweet nectars that come from selinsgrove brewing?

**** you.

Lets kiss.

That is not really my voice, also in the animated BT vedeo revue that is my voice at like 1.25x

I think Frank aka FBC sent me that glass and two dope ass stone coasters from selin's grove. Their IPA continues to amaze me and I seek it out whenever it goes on tap. Top 100s from back in them 2010 days ring on.

here's their IPA:

here is the review:

http://dontdrinkbeer.com/2012/07/10...ylvania-taking-hops-right-to-your-dome-piece/

I drank a whole growler of their Phoenix "Kriek" while playing Red Dead Redemption and it was pretty good. Certainly not a kriek, but a pretty sticky treat in the same vein as Wisconsin Red. Didn't feel like reviewing it.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Do you find brewers appreciate or find the humor in these video reviews or are the majority of them experiencing the bent acorn penis feels we've heard so much about?

Also, how has there been multiple Square/FF references and no love for FFVII? I dont get to play many RPGs anymore but that was always my favorite.

There is an inverse relationship between brewers that appreciate my work and the size of their brewery. I met the brewer from Drake's once and he was like "DONT DRINK BEER? THAT SOUNDS LIKE A SITE I WOULD NEVER SUPPORT! and up and walked away."

Whereas smaller brewers love it and email me giving high fives for saying things they cannot say due to industry protocols. How a midsized brewery like Revolution feels about DDB, it is hit or miss.

One thing that I constantly forget is just how far down the rabbit hole DDB is relative to craft beer, beer nerds, and the scene in general. It is the deepest portion of the craft beer anus, almost the rectum really. I have illustrated this concept below in MS Paint:

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Also, how has there been multiple Square/FF references and no love for FFVII? I dont get to play many RPGs anymore but that was always my favorite.

I reference FFVII but usually only to articulate something kinda esoteric. the problem is every beta casual under the sun played that game and wants to talk about Sephiroth or Aeris dying. It feels like pandering to wear those out.

Here's an example of a thinly veiled FFVII reference from the Kern Pumpkin Ale review:

"D: This is incredibly drinkable, but any low abv beer without an aggressive profile will be drinkable. Ultimately this just fails to deliver in the aspect that it most heavily touts: making with the punkin. If Final Fantasy 7 bragged all day long about the Knights of the Round materia, put it on the box, and made it seem like it was an integral part of the game, people would be pissed. The average person doesn’t want to breed black chocobos all day and when I am promised pumpkin and given watery cinnamon, I bid the beer adieu. I say good day sir."

http://dontdrinkbeer.com/?s=knights+of+the+round

 

[drgarage1]

FFVII had amazing cut-scenes and terrible game play and plot.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

What are your three favorite nonce words from Jabberwocky? Have you ever used the word lupid?

I am really trying to ratchet back the literature I read that is written by pedophiles but, I guess "chortle" would be up on that list.

I do not use the word "lupid" because it means nothing. It is a null set of linguistic values. Perhaps I would utilize it to describe the sensation of getting busy in a Burger King bathroom but I find it to be pretty schpedoinkel at best.

 

[Treebs]

I am really trying to ratchet back the literature I read that is written by pedophiles but, I guess "chortle" would be up on that list.

I do not use the word "lupid" because it means nothing. It is a null set of linguistic values. Perhaps I would utilize it to describe the sensation of getting busy in a Burger King bathroom but I find it to be pretty schpedoinkel at best.

I love you even more for dropping schpedoinkel.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

FFVII had amazing cut-scenes and terrible game play and plot.

That score was incredible. Janus. The Sephiroth theme when you go down into the volcano.

My personal favorite 16 bit song ever? Why it is the song from Zoso, which you can hear if you tune out this permavirgin

 

[drgarage1]

That score was incredible. Janus. The Sephiroth theme when you go down into the volcano.

My personal favorite 16 bit song ever? Why it is the song from Zoso, which you can hear if you tune out this permavirgin

Very true. They really nailed presentation, and they had great art direction and music. The actual game is awkward.

 

[MordorMongo]

Serious, Srs., question, which don't come from me often so I must really care.

About how much prep/writing/practicing/edging time goes into the newer videos?

I assume given your professionallisms you nail them all on first take, but have there been any complete Tonya Harding level meltdowns that have caused us, the fans, from missing something that was clutch in theory?

 

[housepants]

Does your wife support your hobby? This question was sparked by the BRIDE chalice you drank a sour mash (or oats or whatever you called it) from.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Serious, Srs., question, which don't come from me often so I must really care.

About how much prep/writing/practicing/edging time goes into the newer videos?

I assume given your professionallisms you nail them all on first take, but have there been any complete Tonya Harding level meltdowns that have caused us, the fans, from missing something that was clutch in theory?

i write the entire script with a bunch of potential jokes on a sheet off camera but usually most of the jokes get left out because i cant speak fast enough or do the pours effectively to get them in timing wise. one time we completely ****** up on the huna blend and left the guard on when i poured the baked bean in and it was huna and baked beans all over my counter, scrapped the full take.

every other time we did it, no matter what, one take, mostly because once you use half a bottle of cahutlow, theres your ******* take, like it or not.

i write them in stream of consciousness, takes liek 10 mins, the shooting is one take, setting up all that **** buying it is really involved and a pain in the ass, like i knew i wanted a baconator and nothing else would do so i have to go to wendys sit in line, buy ******* water babies, track down foot by the foot and other random items, so its kinda involved but ultimately i think the details improve it. who knows, plus my cousin who films them is a stickler and a cameraman for a living so doesnt put up with my sloppy ass plans, he sets things up all professional like, despite the iphone and single takes.

he also does my labels ever since Jefferz5000 died in that volcano eruption in 2011.

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Does your wife support your hobby? This question was sparked by the BRIDE chalice you drank a sour mash (or oats or whatever you called it) from.

not. at. all.

completely oppositional, dislikes boxes, dislikes beer, thinks every aspect of the hobby and culture is ridiculous.

wishes at every step that DDB would get a DDOS attack and get wiped. Not amused by my antics in the slightest.

 

[jeblikesbeer]

not. at. all.

completely oppositional, dislikes boxes, dislikes beer, thinks every aspect of the hobby and culture is ridiculous.

wishes at every step that DDB would get a DDOS attack and get wiped. Not amused by my antics in the slightest.

A+ wife.

 

[1v1willwreku]

Never forget 1v1 siding with my wife about my clear alcoholism. Nevar.

A+ wife.

 

[xnicknj]

There is an inverse relationship between brewers that appreciate my work and the size of their brewery. I met the brewer from Drake's once and he was like "DONT DRINK BEER? THAT SOUNDS LIKE A SITE I WOULD NEVER SUPPORT! and up and walked away."

Whereas smaller brewers love it and email me giving high fives for saying things they cannot say due to industry protocols. How a midsized brewery like Revolution feels about DDB, it is hit or miss.

One thing that I constantly forget is just how far down the rabbit hole DDB is relative to craft beer, beer nerds, and the scene in general. It is the deepest portion of the craft beer anus, almost the rectum really. I have illustrated this concept below in MS Paint:

I was anticipating a good response to this but holy ******* ****.

 

[StarRaptor1]

FFVII had amazing cut-scenes and terrible game play and plot.

No

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

No

I think he forgot an "I"

this described FFVIII perfectly. the worst plot i have ever had the misfortune of playing. they all came from the same orphanage? really? that's our disc 2 ending? oh wait now we are going to the ******* moon and oh **** the world is completely ruined and you cant go back to do any sidequests, I hope you have a backup save file.

beautiful cut scenes, but determining SEED rank based on number of steps taken? the ****? Triple triad was cool but much better in FF9, aside from the gunblade. no reason to play this installment. totally linear zero replay value.

 

[drgarage1]

I think he forgot an "I"

this described FFVIII perfectly. the worst plot i have ever had the misfortune of playing. they all came from the same orphanage? really? that's our disc 2 ending? oh wait now we are going to the ******* moon and oh **** the world is completely ruined and you cant go back to do any sidequests, I hope you have a backup save file.

beautiful cut scenes, but determining SEED rank based on number of steps taken? the ****? Triple triad was cool but much better in FF9, aside from the gunblade. no reason to play this installment. totally linear zero replay value.

8 was the first of the first 10, no doubt. The plot of VII just seemed like a sad retread of VI, but without the genius that was Kefka.

 

[quentincall]

Which scene is sadder?
The overturned basket of apples outside of Burmecia or Red XIII howling for his father?

 

[xnicknj]

Did you beat Ruby and Emerald Weapon? Did you haz Knights of the Round? If so, how long did you spend locked in your parents basement breeding/racing those ******* chocobos?

 

[dontdrinkbeer]

Did you beat Ruby and Emerald Weapon? Did you haz Knights of the Round? If so, how long did you spend locked in your parents basement breeding/racing those ******* chocobos?

my first playthrough i missed a lot of ****, like who would go snowboarding again to go retrieve Alexander materia? how would you know that is even there? who would dig for that ******* long at the archaeology site?

the chocobo racing seemed dumb as **** upon first blush and it still does, only the most J of JRPG fans wild out on that and I skipped it. Without KotR and mastered Phoenix for the auto-life, Emerald and Ruby are impossible, flat out, even then they are really tough. The breeding process is so counterintuitive that i dont see the casual person doing all that ****, then going to an unmarked island in the middle of nowhere, getting KotR and beating both weapons organically. i mean, i did that later, but, i also spent like 30 hours mixing things together in the cooking game in the first star ocean, scribbling in a notebook.

I...didn't touch many vajeens...

 

[StarRaptor1]

As long as we are going favorite FF rankings
FFVI (I've played in on every format it came on AND have it on my phone)
FFVII (very close to being my favorite all time game but I've replayed FFVI a lot more)
FFIV
FF (First game I ever saved up to buy)
FF Adventures
FF Legends II
FFV
FF Legends
FFIX