&^$% code enforcement

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Zul'jin

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my sofa an th porch is very ncice, they can kiss my ass. ill take em all. fight me bout it. i dare yalls. leave mty sofa alone. wicker is ugly, cordaroy is way nicer. we give ut cnadu w no raxors on halloween on thst soafa to the kids. you lie kkids, no. ? sofa is good. friend ssit on it and drink beers,., we make bbers and they tll me ny niegbor isworse but he is my friend., i dont complain. leav ehis dead mommas stuff alone tgoo. this IS texas! we kicj u in pit. die code monkey!!!!@
 
i mean what si wrongwith nice sofa on frnt porch? rats do not eat it. it is not rtoen up! they givew me a violaton notice!>>?? 875343 them! i got guns nman! sofa or die! it id nice! we all like it. amd mt nieghbot is my bre wbubby snf they gsve him sa tivkrt too! they dont now who we are! we stand and we fight for what we now is right! they say buckes ok, fine! i put bucket sofa. but not brew buxcet. they may take buckets. hell no! not brew buckets! in the street I calling tyou out bitches! the court is colsed! cowards not oen at night!
 
Law.jpg
 
Our dear friend Zul'jin has reverted to his native tongue of Troll. I thought WoW trolls had axes, not guns! He's hit bloodlust, now he needs some people to say allo to his lil friend :D
 
Pardon me stewardess, but I speak drucken, I can help.

Zul'jin said:
my sofa an th porch is very ncice, they can kiss my ass. ill take em all. fight me bout it. i dare yalls. leave mty sofa alone. wicker is ugly, cordaroy is way nicer. we give ut cnadu w no raxors on halloween on thst soafa to the kids. you lie kkids, no. ? sofa is good. friend ssit on it and drink beers,., we make bbers and they tll me ny niegbor isworse but he is my friend., i dont complain. leav ehis dead mommas stuff alone tgoo. this IS texas! we kicj u in pit. die code monkey!!!!@

My sofa on the porch is very nice. They can kiss my ass.
I'll take them all. Fight me about it! I dare ya'll!
Leave my sofa alone.
Wicker is ugly, corduroy is way nicer!
We give out candy with no razors on Halloween on that sofa to the kids.
You like kids, no?
Sofa is good.
Friends sit on it and drink beers.
Me make beers and they told me my neighbor is worse, but he is my friend.
I don't complain.
Leave his dead mom's stuff alone too. This IS Texas!
We kick you in the pit! DIE CODE MONKEY!

For more translations, please see capcrnch at translator.capcrnch.net

No, its not a real URL.

Hope tomorrow is better Zul'jin!!
 
If I Had a nickel fro every time I felt like that... Woohoo was he going 100 mph or what! Gotta agree with him though. All a guy wants to do is brew a beer and drink it on his couch..... I don't understand why they're complaining, it's not like the couch is in the yard up on blocks next to the old ford pinto.
 
That's b*******!

Tell the code monkey you need a place to sit while you clean your guns and mutter to yourself! Then put another on right next to it, along with a nice recliner!
 
This was a pretty funny read this morning. Druck as he was, he was still able to spell "enforcement" in the title, the rest of the post required translation.
 
jas0420 said:
That was hilarious Cap'n! There's probably good money to be made with your excellent bi-lingual skills......

I wish.
That's years of experience right there.
Hands on experience.

Drinking + internet = trying to translate my own words the next day. :eek:
 
This thread almost deserves a sticky. Maybe it could be added to the Wiki for a reference piece on a proper Druck ramble.
 
couch+on+porch.jpg

They can have my couch when they pry it from my cold, dead, fingers.

or something like that. :)
 
And thanks for the stars. It really is a 5 star couch. I will bring with me to court this thread. Please allow county jail IP to access HBT. Thank you.
 
Zul'jin said:
Code Monkey say plastic furniture is OK for outside. I got buckets!

haha, that's awesome!
Way to stick it to the man!


On a more serious note.. That couch isn't ridiculous and doesn't seem to be horribly out of place. What a dick for hammering you on it.
 
Sweet couch, man. Maybe you should call the ACLU, the Man must be infringing on your rights to be druck on that porch couch.
 
even as a Fire Inspector I don't really see the threat of that... aside from it being fuel for a dropped cigarette... perhaps that's the code guys hangup?

other than that, the couch doesn't block any means of egress and adds a bit of southern decor to the house :D
 
BraeHaus said:
even as a Fire Inspector I don't really see the threat of that... aside from it being fuel for a dropped cigarette... perhaps that's the code guys hangup?

other than that, the couch doesn't block any means of egress and adds a bit of southern decor to the house :D

Oh ... I got bones to pick with you Fire Inspectors. But I don't think it has to do anything with Fires. My guess is that it's in the communities CC&R's (Codes, Covenants and Restrictions).
 
Stick this thread as a shinning example of Drunken Rambling. We need a plaque for him or something!
 
Warped04 said:
Oh ... I got bones to pick with you Fire Inspectors. But I don't think it has to do anything with Fires. My guess is that it's in the communities CC&R's (Codes, Covenants and Restrictions).

Every township has it's weird ordinances, and when I do inspection in different states and areas other than my own I always have to call the local townships and have them forward me some of the codes they've adopted and ordinances they strictly enforce.

Just as a side note, not all of us are d!ckheads, I usually ask the person to fix the issues and send them a written letter (usually just to re-iterate the possible offense and to ask them to take the means necessary to fix it, and then give them anywhere between 5 and 30 days to comply).

If I come back a second time and it's not fixed, I issue a citation, after that it goes to court.

I'm pretty easy going and very easy to work with so I rarely have issues that go as far as a citation and court hearing.
 
BraeHaus said:
even as a Fire Inspector I don't really see the threat of that... aside from it being fuel for a dropped cigarette... perhaps that's the code guys hangup?

Uh, yeah, but it's still fuel for a fire whether it's inside or out.
 
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