Best News Headlines

[Kent88]

The profanity filter has been making some interesting decisions lately. I wouldn't test him.

 

[balrog]

I'll go back to typing things in NotePad++, screen grabbing as JPG, editing in Gimp/DarkTable, converting to ASCII graphic, and posting with HBT Morse Code add-on.

Take THAT, ai.

 

[Kent88]

Who said anything about an AI?

 

[McMullan]

If we now determine that plants have feelings and are trying to communicate with us what does that leave Vegans to eat?

Shrooms?

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Shrooms?

Don't get started on mycelial networks...

 

[Brooothru]

Don't get started on mycelial networks...

Hold on. Wasn’t the question “ ‘shrooms”? If so, that’s plural of ‘mycelial’. Would that be a “pair of myceium”?

 

[Kent88]

Gigantic spider found in Australia, dubbed "Hercules," is a record-setter

 

[Cheshire Cat]

Gigantic spider found in Australia, dubbed "Hercules," is a record-setter

I blame the Nuclear tests in the 50’s.

 

[balrog]

I blame someone forgetting their bittering hops.

 

[Rish]

This happened 6 miles from my house. Only in AL!
www.al.com/news/2024/01/man-strips-naked-jumps-into-bass-pro-shops-leeds-aquarium-and-knocks-himself-unconscious.html

 

[Kent88]

Everyone go to bed

Rish won the thread today

 

[balrog]

This happened 6 miles from my house. Only in AL!
www.al.com/news/2024/01/man-strips-naked-jumps-into-bass-pro-shops-leeds-aquarium-and-knocks-himself-unconscious.html

"Jail records show [he] is charged with public lewdness, disorderly conduct, resisting arrest, assault on a police officer, two counts of first-degree criminal mischief and two counts of reckless endangerment."


OMG what about the fish?!!!!

 

[Kent88]

OMG what about the fish?!!!!

It reminds me of a Ray Troll shirt that is NSFW enough that I'm not going to link to it. If you want to find it you'll have to head to Google, search for Ray Troll, go to his T-shirt selection, and sort through the list until you find out about the perils of flyfishing.

 

[Rish]

perils of flyfishing

Page 3. That's been the gag all day on local talk radio. "You didn't bring the size bait you need for the size fish you want to catch!"

 

[day_trippr]

"He seemed fairly normal otherwise"

 

[AzOr]

I would not be standing anywhere near that oversized aquarium, especially the way he was hanging on the glass.

 

[bruce_the_loon]

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-67902966
Can I hire him.

 

[balrog]

I sure hope we're missing decimal point or two...


https://www.cnn.com/2024/01/10/weather/winter-storm-snow-blizzard-forecast-wednesday/index.html
The snowfall will begin to let up in the Midwest and Great Lakes Wednesday, but the threat remains for parts of the interior Northeast and New England. Blizzard conditions are also expected to continue through Wednesday morning in the Northwest, bringing snow totals to several feet in the higher elevations. “Snow levels will fall to 1000-2000 feet on Wednesday, leading to considerable travel impacts for many mountain passes,” the National Weather Service warned.

 

[day_trippr]

That would solve the drought problem for awhile...

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Yep, not shoveling my sidewalk if that is the case.

 

[bruce_the_loon]

Speaking as someone somewhat ignorant of snowfall, I assume they are actually meaning the altitude above sea level where snow will form, like the freezing altitude that will cause hail to form if it is below the upper levels of the clouds?

 

[doug293cz]

Speaking as someone somewhat ignorant of snowfall, I assume they are actually meaning the altitude above sea level where snow will form, like the freezing altitude that will cause hail to form if it is below the upper levels of the clouds?

Yes. I live at about 500ft above MSL (mean sea level.) If the snow level is above 1000ft, I don't have to worry about shoveling. If lower than 500ft, then I'll probably be shoveling. Numbers aren't particularly exact.

Brew on

 

[balrog]

see, I totally misread that, and it makes perfect sense now.
it's also not funny now

nothing to see here, move along

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Meh, more fun to think about unfathomable amounts of precipitation.

3.5 feet is the most I remember witnessing in a 24 hour period, and that was a lot of snow (for the Philly suburbs). Putting it into terms of 100's or 1000's is just mind boggling to me.

 

[bruce_the_loon]

a) @doug293cz thanks for the info
b) @balrog apologies for messing up the joke
c) @balrog I think we all took it as a deliberate misreading

 

[BongoYodeler]

Guessing it was in airplane mode.

https://arstechnica.com/gadgets/202...r-door-plug-blows-off-alaska-air-flight-1282/

 

[day_trippr]

And yet you can drop one four feet and it's time for iPhone Hospital

 

[day_trippr]

Get your Double BM on!

https://www.cnn.com/2024/01/10/food/mcdonalds-double-big-mac/index.html
Full disclosure, fwiw: I haven't been in a "fast food" establishment in nearly a decade. Can't stand the smell...

 

[balrog]

Get your Double BM on!

https://www.cnn.com/2024/01/10/food/mcdonalds-double-big-mac/index.html
Full disclosure, fwiw: I haven't been in a "fast food" establishment in nearly a decade. Can't stand the smell...

When I was younger, perhaps; but my system kinda went into spasm mode just looking at that thing. Made my spleen twitch, so to speak. My brain stepped in to say perhaps this is a colonoscopy year. Thanks, brain.

 

[GrogNerd]

https://www.whiskeyriff.com/2023/12...y-man-blames-dwi-arrest-on-the-new-york-jets/

the fix is in

the NFL is rigged

 

[GrogNerd]

& if you don't think the refs rig games against the Lions at Texas Stadium...

I'm old enough to remember THIS NOT BEING CALLED pass interference

balance of the universe was restored the following week, when Bryant bobbled a pass, ball touched the ground & it was ruled incomplete. that was a game loser for the 'Girls.

the schadenfreude was delicious that day

 

[day_trippr]

Any day the Cowboys lose is a good day for 'Murrica

 

[jschein]

https://www.visitestespark.com/arti...nnual-frozen-dead-guy-days-festival-for-2024/

 

[Clint Yeastwood]

Police Warn that Posting Images of Thieves May Violate Their Privacy Rights

San Francisco dog owner says pet ate opioid-tainted human feces at local park​

 

[Rish]

https://metro.co.uk/2024/01/14/man-says-living-700-tarantulas-good-mental-health-20112227/

 

[Konadog]

https://metro.co.uk/2024/01/14/man-says-living-700-tarantulas-good-mental-health-20112227/

Oh HELL NO!

 

[balrog]

His neighbors say he's a nice quiet person who keeps to himself

 

[Kent88]

 

[pvtpublic]

https://metro.co.uk/2024/01/14/man-says-living-700-tarantulas-good-mental-health-20112227/

700 tarantulas seems daunting until you ask someone to pronounce Gloucestershire properly

 

[McMullan]

His neighbors say he's a nice quiet person who keeps to himself

And now they know and won’t ever be able to sleep or go out in the garden again without getting paranoid about that ‘thing’ crawling up their back. ‘House for sale’ signs ahoy.