You know what I hate?

Brewer's Friend 728
Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum

Help Support Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
i tell you what i hate. i hate my relationships with women.

i have lots of troubles with women. i was raised in a household with four of them and LOTS of cousins, too...that's probably part of my problem.

i was raised to respect women, but i cannot STAND ditzes. the "stupid blonde" type is such a turn-off. i want an intelligent woman, but therein lies the problem. any intelligent woman that isn't bat **** crazy isn't going to stay with me...i'm a foul-mouthed sarcastic bastard with long hair.

maybe as things clean up as i get older, i'll be able to hold on to those women i respect and love so dear, instead of driving them off with my crass and cynical outlook.

or i could just put an ad on craigslist and find another crazy ho-bag. :)
 
More work-inspired stuff....

I hate that every single email I get from my boss is marked urgent like it's the some earth-shattering revelation and I have to send a 'read receipt' through Outlook.

Bloody hell, are you that neurotic that you have to have incontrovertible evidence that people are reading your ill-wrought eye-sore emails??
 
BobNQ3X said:
You know, I should point out that I don’t personally dislike anyone with whom I’ve been so civilly debating, and I’d certainly never think less of anyone, kids or no kids. I’d have a pint with any of you and we’d enjoy each other’s company immensely. We’re simply discussing personal boundaries, and that’s a good thing.
Click to expand...

I'll drink to that. :D :mug:

Moobs bad!

bro.jpg


And I hate Seinfeld too! Damn!
 
GroovePuppy said:
Guys who don't wash their hands after peeing!

Also, people who start new threads then leave for the day. :ban:
Click to expand...

Why does that bother you? I learned at a very young age not to pee on my fingers, and you have to figure that my HANDS are the dirtiest part of my body, So the next time you see a guy standing at the sink washing his pecker off, chances are its me.
-Me
 
A packer fan, a Viking Fan, and a Bears fan were in the bathroom standing at the urinals. The Bear Fan finished and walked over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeded to dry his hands very carefully. He used paper towel after paper towel and ensured that every single spot of water on his hands was dried. Turning to the other two engineers, he said, "In Chicago, we are extremely thorough."

The Viking Fan finished his task at the urinal and he proceeded to wash his hands. He used a single paper towel and made sure that he dried his hands using every available portion of the paper towel. He turned and said, "In Minnesota, not only are we extremely thorough, but we are also extremely efficient."

The Packer fan finished and walked straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder, "In Wisconsin we don't pee on our hands."
 
Word. I once was having a wee (in the men's room, you sorry losers!) at the Ft Bragg PX. I finished, buttoned up, and began to walk out.

A colonel was washing his hands in the sink and said, "Hey, sergeant, didn't your mother teach you to wash your hands after you urinate?"

I replied, "On the contrary, sir, she taught me not to piss on my hands," and walked out.

:D

EDIT: Amazing how that joke gets turned into reality by blokes that think about how to set it up. Even more amazing how idiots walk into it.
 
BobNQ3X said:
Word. I once was having a wee (in the men's room, you sorry losers!) at the Ft Bragg PX. I finished, buttoned up, and began to walk out.

A colonel was washing his hands in the sink and said, "Hey, sergeant, didn't your mother teach you to wash your hands after you urinate?"

I replied, "On the contrary, sir, she taught me not to piss on my hands," and walked out.

:D

EDIT: Amazing how that joke gets turned into reality by blokes that think about how to set it up. Even more amazing how idiots walk into it.
Click to expand...

Dude, what do you expect from a commissioned officer?
I doubt he got it either...
-Me
 
JoeMama said:
Why does that bother you? I learned at a very young age not to pee on my fingers, and you have to figure that my HANDS are the dirtiest part of my body, So the next time you see a guy standing at the sink washing his pecker off, chances are its me.
-Me
Click to expand...

I wash my hands BEFORE I pee. :D
 
JoeMama said:
Why does that bother you? I learned at a very young age not to pee on my fingers, and you have to figure that my HANDS are the dirtiest part of my body, So the next time you see a guy standing at the sink washing his pecker off, chances are its me.
-Me
Click to expand...

Because I'm British and therefore uptight! :drunk:
 
Sorry if this was already mentioned.

Man! I hate rainbows. You know... how they march into your room, crawl up the side of your leg, and bite the inside of your a$$...you know...rainbows. Oh, you mean rain-BOWS...nevermind.
 
Sk84BeeR said:
Sorry if this was already mentioned.

Man! I hate rainbows. You know... how they march into your room, crawl up the side of your leg, and bite the inside of your a$$...you know...rainbows. Oh, you mean rain-BOWS...nevermind.
Click to expand...

Hoss, I think this fella's been stealing yer meds! :drunk:
 

Similar threads

lumpher
Knowing everything right off the bat???
Replies
19
Views
980
lumpher
lumpher
Clint Yeastwood
Spunding Valves on Storage Kegs?
Replies
15
Views
573
odie
odie
R
How long can yeast sit in the fermenter
Replies
12
Views
827
odie
odie
S
What is meant by ferment dry?
Replies
18
Views
1K
Sculptorofstone
S
B
Newbie
Replies
1
Views
258
JohnSand
JohnSand
Brewer's Friend 300

Latest posts

Back
Top