The stupidest comment on your beer

[ICWiener]

Brewed a nice dry irish stout a few years back. My dad and I are working on my truck one day, he's drinking his Coors Lite, I'm drinking my stout. After we have about 8 or 10 he says, "boy you're really handling those." I look at him, "huh?" "Well, aren't those really strong? I thought them dark beers are all really high in alcohol." "No dad, this is only about %5." He says, "Yeah right."

I love my dad, but he doesn't get any of my beers.

Another good one was back in college. This was before I started brewing. I had no knowledge of beer making at the time. Two friends decided they're going to make some beer. They went and bought everything and brewed up a nut brown ale. They saved all of their bottles over the next few weeks while it fermented. Then they realized on bottling day that the Corona binge they had been on left them with several cases of empties that all had limes in them. Oops. They didn't want the homebrew to "spoil" while they collected new bottles, so we had a poker night. about 20 of us hung out, played cards, and got absolutely wasted on flat, warm nut brown ale that was ladled out of a bucket. In hindsight I laugh about it, but hey...at least they didn't throw it out. Thinking back on it, it would have come out pretty good. It was fairly drinkable, all things considered. Then again I happily drank just about anything in those days.

 

[Reno_eNVy]

I made a 5 gallon batch of Cascadian Dark Ale that is 7.5%, has a ton of toasty/roasty flavor, and I used nearly a pound of 6.9% a.a. Cascade hops (the vast majority of which was added after the 20 minute addition.)

I gave a growler to a buddy and his SWMBO.

What does SWMBO say? "Tastes like Newcastle!"

 

[Haputanlas]

I made a 5 gallon batch of Cascadian Dark Ale that is 7.5%, has a ton of toasty/roasty flavor, and I used nearly a pound of 6.9% a.a. Cascade hops (the vast majority of which was added after the 20 minute addition.)

I gave a growler to a buddy and his SWMBO.

What does SWMBO say? "Tastes like Newcastle!"

I think this is one of those situations where it would be appropriate to slap a friend's SWMBO. Not only would I assume that your buddy wouldn't care, he'd probably get in line (Airplane style).

 

[dawgmatic]

Another good one was back in college. This was before I started brewing. I had no knowledge of beer making at the time. Two friends decided they're going to make some beer. They went and bought everything and brewed up a nut brown ale. They saved all of their bottles over the next few weeks while it fermented. Then they realized on bottling day that the Corona binge they had been on left them with several cases of empties that all had limes in them. Oops. They didn't want the homebrew to "spoil" while they collected new bottles, so we had a poker night. about 20 of us hung out, played cards, and got absolutely wasted on flat, warm nut brown ale that was ladled out of a bucket. In hindsight I laugh about it, but hey...at least they didn't throw it out. Thinking back on it, it would have come out pretty good. It was fairly drinkable, all things considered. Then again I happily drank just about anything in those days.

Wow, I thought you were gonna say they gave you all chopsticks to fish em out. I don't think ANY of my friends would be willing to drink flat beer out of a bucket. Kudos to you guys for helping them out

 

[aygov]

I made a 5 gallon batch of Cascadian Dark Ale that is 7.5%, has a ton of toasty/roasty flavor, and I used nearly a pound of 6.9% a.a. Cascade hops (the vast majority of which was added after the 20 minute addition.)

I gave a growler to a buddy and his SWMBO.

What does SWMBO say? "Tastes like Newcastle!"

I brewed an English Brown similar to Newcastle and my buddy's SWMBO told me that it reminded her of Three Floyds Alpha King which is a pretty aggressive Pale Ale...

 

[mattd2]

So not a stupid comment but this is a better place to put it...
Brewed a kind of Belgian Tripple and its been in the bottle for only a month. Approx 9.5% ABV so I thought why not try one.
Wow, it's pretty good except everyone is correct saying you need to let these age 3+ months. My wife took a sip and her face said it all, first pleasent then scrunched up like a tequila shot. I asked her what she thought and she said that it started good but then... I don't know... it just went blah. I said kind of like drinking straight vodka? She took another sip and said yes, exactly like drinking vodka. Was going to give a few bottles to a mate for his birthday next Friday but now I think he'll have to celebrate it late this year

 

[malweth]

My Best Bitter -- my brother's fiancee said it tastes really strong, alcoholy. It's right around 4% and has no fusel alcohol quality.

If it's homebrew.... it *must* be strong.

 

[jgln]

I made a 5 gallon batch of Cascadian Dark Ale that is 7.5%, has a ton of toasty/roasty flavor, and I used nearly a pound of 6.9% a.a. Cascade hops (the vast majority of which was added after the 20 minute addition.)

I gave a growler to a buddy and his SWMBO.

What does SWMBO say? "Tastes like Newcastle!"

Set tasers (?) so stun!

 

[Reno_eNVy]

Phasers, but yeah.

 

[masonsjax]

My Best Bitter -- my brother's fiancee said it tastes really strong, alcoholy. It's right around 4% and has no fusel alcohol quality.

If it's homebrew.... it *must* be strong.

That exceeds the alcohol content of some of the popular beverages that pass for beer, and is certainly stronger flavor, bitterness, and appearance.

 

[dcarter]

Ignorant hick at a party with free premium homebrew (made with love by me)--"Ah ain't drankin no beer made in a bafftub!"

Me- "Thank you, I would rather pour it onto the ground than have that happen"

 

[JoeyChopps]

Last night my father in law tasted my oatmeal stout. After makin the eck face he said
" I just don't like dark beers they have that blah taste to them"
Then he took another sip of his coors lite. Later that night he told my not to be offended that he don't like my beer because he doesn't like German beer

 

[CreamyGoodness]

Awesome, simply awesome. In NYC we have ignorant dipthongs too, they just look a little different.

Ignorant hick at a party with free premium homebrew (made with love by me)--"Ah ain't drankin no beer made in a bafftub!"

Me- "Thank you, I would rather pour it onto the ground than have that happen"

 

[Cascadegan]

Awesome, simply awesome. In NYC we have ignorant dipthongs too, they just look a little different.

Dipthongs?
Like... diphthongs...?

 

[phenry]

My roommate who claims he likes all stouts when trying my Breakfast stout clone: "I like the taste, the aftertaste is bleh though."

The initial taste is coffee and chocolate. The aftertaste is coffee and chocolate. This has been confirmed by everyone else that's had it.

He does keep on complaining that my oatmeal stouts don't taste like oatmeal too, no matter how many times I've explained that oats add texture, not flavor.

 

[spearko520]

my oatmeal stouts taste like quakers.

 

[mugen112]

I haven't finished my first batch yet but everyone thinks I'm going to make poison and kill myself... No joke wtf right.

 

[Reno_eNVy]

I haven't finished my first batch yet but everyone thinks I'm going to make poison and kill myself... No joke wtf right.

98 posts and you haven't made beer yet?

Dude stop talking and start brewing!

 

[mugen112]

98 posts and you haven't made beer yet?

Dude stop talking and start brewing!

It's going into the keg this weekend

 

[SwampassJ]

It's going into the keg this weekend

First beer and already kegging .... You suck!

 

[dannypo]

It's going into the keg this weekend

First beer and already kegging... You are smart

 

[rifraf]

I haven't finished my first batch yet but everyone thinks I'm going to make poison and kill myself... No joke wtf right.

One of my friends is convinced that I will go blind.

 

[Homebrewtastic]

my oatmeal stouts taste like quakers.

This just quantifies that your friends are inherently stupid and not just stupid about beer. I mean... They're eating quarters.

 

[bottlebomber]

I mean... They're eating quarters.

No that you put it that way, they do sound pretty dumb

 

[spearko520]

This just quantifies that your friends are inherently stupid and not just stupid about beer. I mean... They're eating quarters.

i wish they were as innocuous as that. though i've never witnessed it, they must be cannibalizing certain people of a specific religious persuasion...
or possibly staring too long at the can the oats come in...
my friends are retards

 

[mugen112]

First beer and already kegging... You are smart

I have enough trouble waiting for fermentation I can't wait for the bottles to carb up too

Can't u bottle from the keg if someone wants a sample? I read a thread about it.

 

[AussieBrewerInColorado]

I have enough trouble waiting for fermentation I can't wait for the bottles to carb up too

Can't u bottle from the keg if someone wants a sample? I read a thread about it.

Indeed you can, that's what I do. Your biggest problem is oxygenation, attach a hose to your cobra tap or faucet and make sure beer is flowing from the bottom of the vessel to reduce oxygenation. I know people who have won medals, entering them in competitions with this method.

 

[MaxSpang]

When giving my mom a hydrometer sample straight out of the carboy

"It's ok, but it needs to be colder."


Plus she always describes my beer as "too bitter", including a Pumpkin Pie Ale. However, she LOVED the last IPA I made (70+ IBUS)

 

[beardley]

Only a couple people have posted this, but honestly my first thought when sampling my my first Homebrew (Mr. Beer Kit) was along the lines of "Hmm... it does taste like beer."

Was my first batch, so I allow myself to be impressed by the fact that I didn't screw it up entirely.

I don't share my homebrews often, but I have a batch of EdWort's Apfelwein going right now. My boss asked me how I made it. I told her that it was a family recipe that has been passed down since before my family immigrated from Germany and that the recipe is over 200 years old. She actually believed me until I started laughing.

 

[Reno_eNVy]

Only a couple people have posted this, but honestly my first thought when sampling my my first Homebrew (Mr. Beer Kit) was along the lines of "Hmm... it does taste like beer."

Only a couple? Are you sure you read through the entire thread?

 

[Franco]

On suggesting a friend's husband come over to try a couple different styles, she said "... won't it kill him?"

 

[Reno_eNVy]

On suggesting a friend's husband come over to try a couple different styles, she said "... won't it kill him?"

"YUP! I personally indulge in this poison on a daily basis, I was just wondering if your husband would like to kill himself with me."

 

[mugen112]

Lol everyone thinks homebrew is poizon!

 

[PGHBrewer]

Had my stout at a party and lots of people were drinking it. Went up to a lady with a bottle in her hand, I asked her what she thought. She said "yeah, I just brewed this one up" I just smiled and walked away.

 

[Trail]

Had my stout at a party and lots of people were drinking it. Went up to a lady with a bottle in her hand, I asked her what she thought. She said "yeah, I just brewed this one up" I just smiled and walked away.

...What is this? I don't even.

 

[bottlebomber]

...What is this? I don't even.

I don't even, either.

 

[mattd2]

Had my stout at a party and lots of people were drinking it. Went up to a lady with a bottle in her hand, I asked her what she thought. She said "yeah, I just brewed this one up" I just smiled and walked away.

You should have quized her about it

 

[JoeyChopps]

+1 ur a better person than I. I would have belittled the wholey hell out of her to make her feel an inch talk if she took credit for my brew

 

[Reno_eNVy]

Had my stout at a party and lots of people were drinking it. Went up to a lady with a bottle in her hand, I asked her what she thought. She said "yeah, I just brewed this one up" I just smiled and walked away.

 

[malweth]

Maybe she brought her own, too!

It annoys me when people disregard serving information. I'm standing right there telling you not to drink it out of the bottle...