CGVT
Senior Member
Do any of them ever say funny **** about beer?
Funny things you've overheard about beer
- Thread starter microbusbrewery
- Start date
Help Support Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum:
slym2none
"Lazy extract brewer."
Redneck: "Hey man, got any beer?"
Me: "Now that's funny!"
Me: "Now that's funny!"
You might be a redneck if you can't say anything funny about beer?
1977Brewer
Free Dan Hess.
But Jim Koch says that yeast keeps you from getting drunk.
No. Can't happen, ever. Sounds like a poseur.
You have 'White Collar' office types, then there are 'Blue Collar' types factories, mills, freight, warehouse, services etc.
'Red Neck' is the outdoor, sun weathered worker, construction workers, cowboys, fishermen, farmers etc. The sun gives red necks due to burn.
Wait - I fit all three of those , am I a red white & blue neck?
drainbamage
Keep HBT weird.
Ha, come to my office. We have plenty of white-collar rednecks.
Wait - I fit all three of those , am I a red white & blue neck?
cyanmonkey
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2014
- Messages
- 1,074
- Reaction score
- 153
Yes. Basically, you're French redneck. That's what you're implying, right?
Hmmmm. Bill collectors no doubt.
I was in the WineMonopoly today (seriously vinmonopolet.no, check it out) and overheard one of the cool, tattooed, man-pony-tail workers trying to describe a sour to one of the customers. I cringed, and cringed, and cringed. He was simply trying to sell one of the more expensive beers, and had no clue how to answer the questions. The guy asked how it had a different taste than normal, and the worker said, "Well, of course, it still has the taste of... grains. And you know it's got that. And well, it just has kind of a different taste, because it's brewed in a different way. Which is that they move it immediately to a keg (yes, a keg). And then it just becomes different at that point because they don't bottle it right away." I had to walk away... and out of the store. OK, I walked out of the store because I didn't find anything I wanted to purchase this time. But still...
cyanmonkey
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2014
- Messages
- 1,074
- Reaction score
- 153
For sure. I just don't wanna be the 'WEEEEELLLL ACTUALLY...' guy.
ElJefeBrews
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2013
- Messages
- 7,777
- Reaction score
- 130
Not so much funny as it is awesome. Ran into this at a buddies house....
View attachment 1448069054268.jpg
View attachment 1448069054268.jpg
fredthecat
The original homebrewer™.
im so old and bitter that i cant even do "well actually" without ranting and insulting someone, so i tend to just leave the scene entirely. painful story
1977Brewer
Free Dan Hess.
Redneck = A glorious absence of sophistication.
Not only is that Modern Times Honda Fit story awesome, but on their website, they have some very interesting sounding beers... and they provide homebrew recipes for most of them!
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/year-round
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/seasonal
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/special-release
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/year-round
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/seasonal
http://moderntimesbeer.com/beer/special-release
ElJefeBrews
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2013
- Messages
- 7,777
- Reaction score
- 130
Modern times is awesome. I am blessed to have them just right down the street
I fianly read through all this thread, took a few months but Im finally caught up, and to top it all off I have a slightly amusing thing I heard about beer.
At my cousin's batchlor party we got a little carried away, what started with some friendly beer pong quickly devolved in to Bacardi pong and thus the downward spiral began. At the end of the night me and my buddy Jeffery were the only ones still standing ( more leaning in a standing like manner). And lo there was still beer left, the majority of a brick of Sam Adam's chocolate bock. We decided to see if we could finish it, which we did. Poor old Jeffery hit the floor shortly after he finished his last beer, a moment later he proceeds to empty himself on the carpet. With the last of his might he looks up and proclaims "it tastes like chocolate." and promptly drifts off to dream lands with his puddle as a pillow. The next morning as the lot of us fianly come to, everyone much worse for wear, Jeffery starts asking questions and the night before, mostly involving why the world smells and tastes like a Hershey bar. 3 days later at the wedding he told me that he still smells chocolate.
At my cousin's batchlor party we got a little carried away, what started with some friendly beer pong quickly devolved in to Bacardi pong and thus the downward spiral began. At the end of the night me and my buddy Jeffery were the only ones still standing ( more leaning in a standing like manner). And lo there was still beer left, the majority of a brick of Sam Adam's chocolate bock. We decided to see if we could finish it, which we did. Poor old Jeffery hit the floor shortly after he finished his last beer, a moment later he proceeds to empty himself on the carpet. With the last of his might he looks up and proclaims "it tastes like chocolate." and promptly drifts off to dream lands with his puddle as a pillow. The next morning as the lot of us fianly come to, everyone much worse for wear, Jeffery starts asking questions and the night before, mostly involving why the world smells and tastes like a Hershey bar. 3 days later at the wedding he told me that he still smells chocolate.
drainbamage
Keep HBT weird.
You know that all their recipes ( or at least the core ones) were developed by @oldsock aka the mad fermentationist? You can see all the trial iterations in the site
Just came back from the store. In my cart I had vacuum bags, case of Upland brewing co. variety pack, and a wood floor duster.
Lady cashier - Does not look like a fun day for you
Me - I have beer!
Her - Why do men always need beer when doing chores?
Me -
Her - When I tell my husband to clean and stain the deck he tells me he will need a few beers.
Me - It gets done thought right?
Her - um..well...yea...have a good day.
I find a lot of women are task oriented.... It's about how you do it. And get it done quickly too.
A lot of men are goal, or outcome oriented. Did the final product come out well.
Sorry for the post necrophilia, I'm only up to page 200 and sumpin.
It's so funny still reading from page 300, and it pops up at the end too.
Kudos to this thread, delivering from beginning to end. (Except for the statistics and economics lessons)
ericbw
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2012
- Messages
- 3,592
- Reaction score
- 1,225
I don't know, man. This sounds more like a "we need to go to meetings" story.
Change hops to grain, and I'd believe it.
You shouldn`t...
You want to hear something funny.... Australian beer glass sizes.
In South Australia, where I am,
we have Schooners and pints. A schooner is usually a pilsner glass or equivalent size. A pint is a US pint ... A real pint can be had in certain bars. Oh, and there are Butchers. Fable has it because butchers had cut off their fingers they could hold it. Think a small water glass at a restaurant size.
Then you drink in other states and they have Pots. The equivalent of a Schooner. Or Handles, beer mugs.
It's crazy, the non standard sizing in a metric country.
What's really not funny is replying to hundreds of 5-year old posts...
tennesseean_87
Well-Known Member
There's a local radio add for a bank, and the manager is named John Palmer. Whenever it comes on I forget for a second I'm listening to radio and not beer podcasts.
Roland_deschain
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2015
- Messages
- 270
- Reaction score
- 111
Let's see......there's too many 'funny' things to list but here's a few of my favorites.
1. The young pups who come into my favorite local craft brew pub and get pissy that they don't have Miller Lite on tap.
2. "You're going to become an alcoholic if you keep brewing so much beer"
3. Sitting at said local pub and listening to the Miller distribution rep try and convince the bartenter( a friend of mine and a craft beer lover of the highest order) that Blue Moon is the best selling craft beer in America and she couldn't understand why they wouldn't keep it on tap regularly. I had to bite my tongue to not chime in.
4. My personal favorite, being told that because I home brew I'm legally a bootlegger and should pray I don't get caught.
1. The young pups who come into my favorite local craft brew pub and get pissy that they don't have Miller Lite on tap.
2. "You're going to become an alcoholic if you keep brewing so much beer"
3. Sitting at said local pub and listening to the Miller distribution rep try and convince the bartenter( a friend of mine and a craft beer lover of the highest order) that Blue Moon is the best selling craft beer in America and she couldn't understand why they wouldn't keep it on tap regularly. I had to bite my tongue to not chime in.
4. My personal favorite, being told that because I home brew I'm legally a bootlegger and should pray I don't get caught.
GrogNerd
mean old man
clearing up the backlog of crap on our DVR, we finally got around to watching the season premiere of Bones (aired 10/1) last night
:smack:
:smack:
