Obnoxious Football Trash Talk Thread

^^^ Look who peeked in his shorts and discovered he still had a pair :rockin:

Fans of division leading teams with at least 10 wins raise your hands!

No, not most of you.

Cheers!

day_trippr said:

Fans of division leading teams with at least 10 wins raise your hands!

No, not most of you.

Cheers!

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Raise your hand if your team leads a division containing Buffalo, NY Jets and Miami. Congrats, you're the tallest midget.

Punity said:

Oh my we really wanna get into this, not really a debate, Harrington I rest my case. But please enlighten me to the pedigree of Duck Qbs to grace the nfl

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So wait, you actually think Locker is the same caliber as Harrington? I know you really don't, but its funny you posted that

....

troyh said:

Raise your hand if your team leads a division containing Buffalo, NY Jets and Miami. Congrats, you're the tallest midget.

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Haha so true! The AFC east is sh**! Don't get me wrong the pats are tough (hey cape this is what giving credit when it's due looks like) but they are the only team in that division that would beat a CFL team....also how about them 49ers! Every other team sucks!

Why would I give credit to crappy teams?? Which... every other team is compared to the Pats. The 9'rs caught the Pats on a night where the Pats played like absolute crap and the Pats still almost beat them. The Pats caughed the ball up four times, were down by four touchdowns, were playing like total *&%$ and STILL tied the game up and almost won. Total fluke the Pats turn the ball over that many times.

troyh said:

Raise your hand if your team leads a division containing Buffalo, NY Jets and Miami. Congrats, you're the MDTOTM.

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Sure, but the Pats have played the toughest schedule in the AFC.

http://www.playoffstatus.com/nfl/afcsosag.html

pats blow. shocking that it took them 13 weeks to win that division.

motobrewer said:

pats blow. shocking that it took them 13 weeks to win that division.

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One of the most explosive offenses in the history of the game.

They on pace to just-miss the most points ever scored in an NFL season and just hung 34 on the "best D in the league" in a matter of minutes in the second half the other night.

Admit it... you sleep a little better at night knowing that pile of crap Pack D doesn't have to face the Pats unless the Packers make it to the Super Bowl.

Cape Brewing said:

They on pace to just-miss the most points ever scored in an NFL season and just hung 34 on the "best D in the league" in a matter of minutes in the second half the other night.

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only because the 49ers went on "prevent" scheme before halftime. when it's 31 to 3 your brain just automatically turns to that - but unfortunately there was still 3/4 of a game left to play.

Ahhhh. So the other dozen teams the Pats played this year were in prevent too?

Cape Brewing said:

Ahhhh. So the other dozen teams the Pats played this year were in prevent too?

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Of course rush 2 drop 9 30 yd deep classic Pats defensive gameplay when playing them.

Punity said:

Of course rush 2 drop 9 30 yd deep classic Pats defensive gameplay when playing them.

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By looking at the points, that strategy is working well, huh?

Cape Brewing said:

Admit it... you sleep a little better at night knowing that pile of crap Pack D doesn't have to face the Pats WHEN the Packers make it to the Super Bowl.

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You mean WHEN they make it to the SuperBowl.

And just for you Cape... Fixed that for you.

Enough with the Pat talk... Seems to have been going on for the last 60 pages or more.


Predictions for the last 3 playoff slots?

Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, New York, Dallas, Washington, Minnesota, Chicago, Miami, St. Louis??

I'll say Pittsburgh, Washington, and Minnesota. Pittsburgh has a better divisional record than Cincy and they face off next week. Washington is on fire lately and everything seems to be going their way. And Minnesota also has a leg up on Chicago if they end the season with the same record. Predicting an upset against Houston next week, and at least one more loss for Chicago, who have been performing poorly since Mid Season.

bobbrews said:

Enough with the Pat talk... Seems to have been going on for the last 60 pages or more.

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It's just because all y'all who aren't ADMITTED New England fans are still in the closet about your true love of all things Patriot. It's all right. Take your time. Your mama will love you even more when you admit your desire to root for The Greatest Team That Ever Has Been And Ever Will Be.

Incidentally, for those of you who are new to watching football, rushing 2 and putting 9 in coverage is the *dumbest* possible way to defend Brady and the Pats. Hell, you could put 22 players in coverage and Brady's going to carve you up, if you're only rushing 2. Brady "struggles" - as does every QB who has ever played - when you put pressure on him. They've had troubles matching up against the Giants because the G-men can get pressure with just their front 4.

Do an obvious blitz? Hot-read to Welker, that's why he's so valuable.

Prevent D? He's find the hole in the zone.

Double-cover everyone except the fourth-string tight end? He'll put a pass in his hands so perfect, your 4-year old baby nephew could catch it.

Get pressure up the middle with your defensive line? You've got a chance. Pressure up the middle's more important than pressure off the edge, since he's better at sliding up the pocket than escaping out the side.

There's your Football 101 lesson for today. There will be a quiz.

No one cares, now stop boasting.

They are in the playoffs. Discussion is over.

NE will be booted out within one or two rounds anyway.

Now back to all things non-Patriots...

the_bird said:

Do an obvious blitz? Hot-read to Welker, that's why he's so valuable.

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or, overthrow him on 4th down and lose the game.

motobrewer said:

or, overthrow him on 4th down and lose the game.

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Nope - that's Danny Woodhead, who's similarly sized, but you see, he has a whole different name and even a different number on his jersey and everything, just to help those folks who, like Moto, apparently can't read the different names on their jerseys to tell the difference between the two players.

I agree... more talking about the Pats.

Given how pissed the Pats must be over coughing one up to a crappy 9'rs team, how many points do you think they're going to punish Jacksonville with?

i think they might break 100

stratslinger said:

Nope - that's Danny Woodhead, who's similarly sized, but you see, he has a whole different name and even a different number on his jersey and everything, just to help those folks who, like Moto, apparently can't read the different names on their jerseys to tell the difference between the two players.

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I think moto was talking about laying a "pass in his hands that your 4-year old baby nephew could catch"

You Pats fans crack me up...

Jesus cape, do you actually believe the BS that cinema out if your mouth or are you just that blissfully ignorant?

Lazarous said:

Jesus cape, do you actually believe the BS that cinema out if your mouth or are you just that blissfully ignorant?

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Someone just had an aneurysm thinking about the awesomeness.

Cape Brewing said:

i think they might break 100

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I think they break Chad Henne.

Just think... If we all blocked bird and cape then we could actually discuss Football instead of the Patriots. Get a room guys... or open up a separate thread about your unwavering love for the Brady Bunch.

If you blocked me and Cape, you'd have like thirty posts of Hoppy drooling on himself. You don't like it, GTFO.

If we blocked Cape and the_bird, there would be plenty of relevent facts missing from this thread. Where's the parity? There are plenty of fans from the 31 teams that suck, a few Pats fans balance all that suck.

bluemoose said:

If we blocked Cape and the_bird, there would be plenty of relevent facts missing from this thread. Where's the parity? There are plenty of fans from the 31 teams that suck, a few Pats fans balance all that suck.

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YEAH!!!...

wait...

what???

Correction...

cape, bird, and moose

the_bird said:

I think they break Chad Henne.

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SONOFA!!! That's right! I forgot he was there.

damn it all to crap... figures they're playing an away game. My favorite Dead Schembechlers tune, a particular ode to Chad Henne, is a staple of our tailates and would be been particularly fitting to play prior to this weekend's contest.

(google or Itunes... do yourself the favor)

stratslinger said:

Nope - that's Danny Woodhead, who's similarly sized, but you see, he has a whole different name and even a different number on his jersey and everything, just to help those folks who, like Moto, apparently can't read the different names on their jerseys to tell the difference between the two players.

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i don't care about irrelevant players who can't catch easy passes to make a 4th down conversion.

Cape Brewing said:

Ain't no woman wit a 1-900 numbah!!

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Hey come on, she's in the investment business like you. And her linkedin title is Head Trader.

She's a big NFL fan & was flying back from the Detroit / Cardinals game in AZ. I called her a single serving friend but she didn't get the reference. Supposedly I am now her token US buddy.

Or she was really trashed and will erase me from her life after the little tongue action kiss she dropped on me before we parted ways. Anyway, an interesting extended layover that's for sure.

you.....don't travel much, do you?

For Christ's sake... can we tear ourselves away from Desertbrews 12 seconds of Heaven with Gurtrude, the 400 lb German woman and focus... FOCUS!!!

New England Patriots... win by 42 this weekend.

BOOK IT!

Cape Brewing said:

For Christ's sake... can we tear ourselves away from Desertbrews 12 seconds of Heaven with Gurtrude, the 400 lb German woman and focus... FOCUS!!!

New England Patriots... win by 42 this weekend.

BOOK IT!

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Wow...calling a victory over a team with a 2-12 record? Really going out on a limb on this one. Let me know when your done pleasuring Brady

Lazarous said:

Wow...calling a victory over a team with a 2-12 record? Really going out on a limb on this one. Let me know when your done pleasuring Brady

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Your post would have some merit if I had simply "called a victory"... but if you read the very short sentences (we'll give you some time), you'll notice I actually predicted a 42 point win.

See... in this game called football (they play on this biggggggg field, with a ball that has this odd shape... know what... just google it)...

anyway... in football, a given team scoring 42 points isn't something that happens in a very high percentage of games. Oh sure, teams DO score that many... as a matter of fact, the New England Patriots have done it several times this year... but.. a margin of victory of 42 points, that's pretty rare. That only happens a handful of times per year and that's really what I was predicting.

So... if you think about it... your whole "Ooooo you're really going out on a limb" train of thought is... well... kinda stupid... because, in fact, I was going out on a limb.

Cape, I know you started it and all, but did you name this thread after yourself in mind?... Specifically the words Obnoxious and Trash?

I can think of another word to describe just about every one of your posts.
...Condescending.

Edit: Or Masshole... I always found that word humorous.

bobbrews said:

Cape, I know you started it and all, but did you name this thread after yourself in mind?... Specifically the words Obnoxious and Trash?

I can think of another word to describe just about every one of your posts.
...Condescending.

Edit: Or Masshole... I always found that word humorous.

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You lost me after "Cape, I....:" Then I got bored and started staring at the stapler on my desk, which is more fascinating by a factor of about 12

It must be very sad to know that the only high points in your life are things like the New England Patriots and Staplers.

What?

Sorry... I was ignoring you some more there.