The "I'm pretending to be a Mechanic" thread?

[TallDan]

I did a valve adj on my 91 E34 M5 this summer as well (218k on this one)

View attachment 550018



We had an Audi Mk1 TT 2004 with the 1.8T quattro 222hp version and it was a maintenance fiend. The engine destroyed itself because of premature timing belt failure, which VAG was aware of. The result was a class action lawsuit for owners of the engine (A4, TT etc), what a mess. So that was a new engine, then had to rebuild the 6sp transmission, the welds at the exhaust expansion joint cracked, electrical issues, cluster issues, and much more. We are meticulous with maintenance and care, owning old BMW M5s, but from what other owners told me it was part of the deal. I thought the BMWs could be troublesome, well the Audi beat them in that respect.

That looks more like 21k than 218k!

My 2.7T Allroad had timing belt tensioner failure, which is pictured above. When I bought the car, I replaced the timing belt, 5 years and ~25k miles later the tensioner failed, timing slipped, and it bent valves. That was the end for me. Great car when it ran, and with good winter tires it was phenominal in the snow. One does not buy a used Allroad and expect reliability though. In fact, I expected the opposite and got it.

http://dougdemuro.kinja.com/german-reliability-the-greatest-myth-ever-sold-to-amer-1572026115

For this reason, I have taken to measuring automotive reliability on a scale I've dubbed the "Audi Allroad Scale Of Unreliability," which rates cars based on how close they are to the original Audi Allroad in terms of potential for random four-figure maintenance bills. For example: the Lexus ES300 is pretty low on the Audi Allroad Scale Of Unreliability. Whereas a vehicle made entirely by chimpanzees provided with random car parts would be almost as bad as the Allroad. Maybe even worse if the chimpanzees are German.

 

[BikerMatt]

I wanted an allroad so bad once, ended up with the Xc70, from what I've heard everywhere not a bad choice

 

[DoctorMemory]

Splines sheared off the collar sleeve between the transfer box and drive shaft so no drive to the back wheels. Had that, and the Haldex oil+filter replaced

I was told "Haldex" is Swedish for "enjoy your walk"...

 

[BruceH]

I'm another who can't stand paying someone to do something I'm capable of doing. The only exception so far has been setting up rear gears. I will pay to have gears swapped because setting them up for no noise takes exceptional patience and is magic imo.

I think it comes from growing up on a farm. We did everything from working on machinery to construction. There just wasn't extra money to hire out jobs we were capable of doing.

I even reshingled my roof a few years ago because I couldn't stand the thought of paying someone to do something I knew I could do. That was a huge mistake. The roof is fine and total cost was about $2000 but it took my 50+ year old body a good month to heal from the week it took to complete the job. I went into it thinking it would be three days max but I was basing that on the last time I had shingled 30+ years ago. 30+ years ago my body didn't hurt like it does now, lol.

Something that is always maddening is how easy some cars are to work on vs completely boneheaded or very old designs.

I recently had to change the pcv valve on my daughters 2001 Taurus. It's located under the center of intake manifold. Ford books it at 3.5 hours because the intake manifold and all air intake related parts need to come off.

Luckily a google search turned up a 10 minute solution. Pull the air intake tube, throttle body, and associated attachments, use a 7/8 deep socket on a wobbly extension to get under the intake manifold and onto the twist lock pcv valve.

I said a prayer and attempted the 7/8 socket trick. It worked.

The original code was for idle air speed being off. This was due to unmetered air coming in via the defective pcv valve and associated hose. It was also causing an oil drip due to blowby not being contained.

 

[skraeling]

Been a while since I contributed to my one contribution to HBT.

Well my semi leaky head gasket likes to seep a tiny amount of coolant randomly from somewhere behind the water pump cast housing. The water pump sits into this housing so meh car doesn’t overheat and I haven’t had to top up coolant...

Except I did because the seal between the water pump and housing leaked bad enough it was throwing coolant onto the belt. The pump which looked like it had been replaced once already (non Oem impeller design). So replaced it with a new one even though I could have resealed the old one. The pump was only 20.00 so why not.

Other than that the car just keeps on trucking. Kind of insane for an 18 year old vehicle of gm design.

Also easiest water pump replacement ever.

I could probably do the HG but it can wait till the weather doesn’t suck.

 

[BikerMatt]

Got the Volvo back from the collision repair shop some time ago, replaced left side ball joint and fixed a snapped exhaust end can hanger (welded a bent bolt where the old one was, better than new) also changed the MAP sensor to get the IAT fault code off the computer, got it past the inspection and been driving it for a few weeks without worries.

My wife started complaining to me that her Skoda drives and smells "somehow funny" so I hopped on to the passenger side on the way to the grocery store. First crossroad I was afraid the whole thing is gonna tip over, told her to drive to the nearest gas station ASAP to confirm my suspicions. 1.1bar in all four corners! FFS I don`t ever drive the car so I can`t be expected to take care of it! Oh and the funny smell? Right side handbrake is sticking so bad the disc is radiating heat a foot away! Last VAG I`ll ever buy, the thing`s been nothing but worries and a crap ride from day one. It`s supposed to be an upper middle class car right? (Octavia Scout) Compared to the Volvo the ride is rock hard, seats uncomfortable and it`s riddled with stupid faults clearly caused by budget cuts.

 

[triethylborane]

My wife started complaining to me that her Skoda drives and smells "somehow funny" so I hopped on to the passenger side on the way to the grocery store. First crossroad I was afraid the whole thing is gonna tip over, told her to drive to the nearest gas station ASAP to confirm my suspicions. 1.1bar in all four corners! FFS I don`t ever drive the car so I can`t be expected to take care of it! Oh and the funny smell? Right side handbrake is sticking so bad the disc is radiating heat a foot away!

omg lol

Last VAG I`ll ever buy, the thing`s been nothing but worries and a crap ride from day one. It`s supposed to be an upper middle class car right? (Octavia Scout) Compared to the Volvo the ride is rock hard, seats uncomfortable and it`s riddled with stupid faults clearly caused by budget cuts.

Yeah, not a fan of VAG. Lots of wasted $$$$$ on subpar engineering on my Audi.

My sister has a 92 240GL with 190k that she uses for a beater. Runs great.

 

[skraeling]

View attachment 557626 omg lol



Yeah, not a fan of VAG. Lots of wasted $$$$$ on subpar engineering on my Audi.

My sister has a 92 240GL with 190k that she uses for a beater. Runs great.

Is Audi German for (replace when warranty expires)?

 

[S-Met]

I want a new car and this camry wont die!

I wanted a new car since my camry was at 130k. I think it was 384k before I gave in. The revearse gear started going out. New tranny wasn't worth the cost, used tranny was questionable being a 1997 model. Getting overdue for countless other minor to moderate repairs. Since I got it used for 7k with 89k on it, I felt I got my money's worth.

 

[triethylborane]

Is Audi German for (replace when warranty expires)?

Yeah, kaputt.

 

[Lefou]

My F150 Lightning is almost 15 years old now, barely 50K miles on it.
The whole time I've had it, I've only done one "simple" upgrade modification on it, a new K&N air intake assembly my wife was nice enough to buy for my birthday. The old stock assembly was more or less a rubber boot from intake to throttle body and estimated time to replace was 90 minutes with the right tools, ID-10t directions and all.

No problemo, right?

Six frickin' hours of struggling with minor clearances, sensor wires, and an untold number of curses, it finally fit together. I started at noon and was done by almost dark.
Ninety minutes, my butt. Another DIY fix for oil being sucked into the intake is supposed to cost less than a couple dollars and ten minutes. I haven't tried that yet....