Sizing your chest freezer for a...

[StunnedMonkey]

...dead hooker. I know that I found the sticky "Sizing Your Chest Freezer for Corny Kegs" in the kegging forum extremely helpful when building my keezer. I thought maybe we could compile a similar thread for the crowd here, what with New Years Eve right around the corner.

Here is my fermentation freezer. It's 7 Cu Ft, and can hold one dead hooker (small) and a keg of maibock for lagering. Hope this helps someone down the road. I know winter is here and the ground is hard in a lot of places.

Feel free to add your own.

 

[humann_brewing]

thanks for the info, I was wondering what the capacity was. Luckily I have the same freezer too

 

[DeathBrewer]

I personally usually size the dead hooker for the chest freezer. An axe, a chainsaw and a bonesaw do wonders...

 

[captianoats]

It's 7 Cu Ft, and can hold one dead hooker (small) and a keg of maibock for lagering.

Nobody wants to hide a large dead hooker.

 

[jmendez29]

That's awesome!! You must be into midget hookers. That's cool, man.

 

[StunnedMonkey]

That's awesome!! You must be into midget hookers. That's cool, man.

Small chicks need love too. Besides, I can't swing one of those big honkin' 15 cu ft chest freezers in that room so I'm sort of limited.

 

[Zul'jin]

I have a few recipes that negate the need for long term storage.

 

[arturo7]

Zul'j buddy, you eat the dead hookers?


That's just sick.

 

[scratchypants]

4 words: wood chipper, lauter tun.

 

[Zul'jin]

Zul'j buddy, you eat the dead hookers?


That's just sick.

They're usually dead by the end. It really can't be helped.

 

[CNote2]

A little in the compost pile, a little buried deep in the home garden... By the time they're found and put back together, I'll be on my way to enjoying a home-grown, home-brewed Dead Hooker Ale...

 

[Ricand]

This is a fairly common sizing requirement. Just FYI, the 18 cu/ft will apparently hold two.

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/app/1528252839.html

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

I like the thermal mass that is provided by the three quartered hookers I keep in my 16 cu ft. On party nights we pull out a mid section, run the draft lines through the mouth and out the vajayjay and she serves well as a Jockey box.

 

[Fingers]

Is the requirement for the dead hooker alone, or is this with kegs? I think I could maybe get two large or three small hookers in mine, but I'd have to take the six kegs out. It's just not worth it when you can drop her in the back forty and let coyotes take care of the mess. Unless, of course, you're not done with her.