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Phrases that prove you're the expert

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One of my coworkers likes to use this one a lot : "I've got news for you..."

At least one sentence in every conversation begins with that phrase. Sometimes multiple. It's uncanny how often she says it. As if she is imparting some sort of profound knowledge to you every time she opens her mouth. Even when making obvious nonstatements. I wonder if she thinks of it as her catchphrase, or something.

"I've got news for you, it's raining outside." No sh!t, Sherlock, I can see it out the window. Condescending asshoke.
is she my dad?
You know what you're problem is?

I love that one. then I can tell them "yes" and list off a bunch of crap and end it with "...and you're talking to me."
 
Let me stop all of you cockalorums and rampallians right there. Imma let you finish, but I've got news for you...Any halfway competent idiot knows, in actual fact: if one finds oneself dependent upon mere simple phrases as a crutch to prove their intellectual fortitude, then clearly they are not as much of an authority on the aforementioned subject matter as they would have you believe. ERGO, I don't need to prove my quintessential expertise on this matter. So as, has been stated previously, plain and simple, it just is
 
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*expertise achieved*
 
Anytime someone responds to a paragraph dissecting it into 20 different quoted sentences I just gloss past. Go debate on some news comments section.
 
One of my coworkers likes to use this one a lot : "I've got news for you..."

At least one sentence in every conversation begins with that phrase. Sometimes multiple. It's uncanny how often she says it. As if she is imparting some sort of profound knowledge to you every time she opens her mouth. Even when making obvious nonstatements. I wonder if she thinks of it as her catchphrase, or something.

"I've got news for you, it's raining outside." No sh!t, Sherlock, I can see it out the window. Condescending asshoke.

"I hate to burst your bubble, but..."

Don't call me bubble-butt.
 
Rampallian. I like that word. Billy Klub might have them on vinyl. The motorcycle enthusiasts of HBT might have that stiched on the back of their jackets. They could be a race of humanoid lizards.
 
As has been stated previously
Like has been said
Some have correctly stated

If someone tries to drop that on you, smile and say "by who?" Weasel words ;).
 
The science is settled ...


Oh yeah, then we can stop funding your research grants, right?
 
I know one phrase that makes me discount any thing that person says, both before & after they utter it - just end your sentence with "...and things of that nature."

That person has no idea what they are talking about.

:)

(Wait, did I just end a sentence with that very same line???)

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