Funny things you've overheard about beer

[Pyg]

Just last weekend my mother was telling me how barley upsets he stomach and she can't eat beef and barley soup, as she's drinking her miller light.
She also claims to be lactose intolerant but half the cheeses and things she claims give her trouble don't contain lactose, and every time I talk to her she has another story of how she accidentally ate butter or something and miraculously didn't have any reaction.

I have a mother who will not drink my wine because of an "allergy to sulfates",
But she consume so many things with sulfates...
She wont drink beer because of an "allergy to grain" but eats bread!

 

[TheCADJockey]

Gaaaah! Don't eats the gloootens!!

 

[BreezyBrew]

Hmm something is fishy..

View attachment 1419443739880.jpg

 

[hunter_le five]

Gaaaah! Don't eats the gloootens!!

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4jMWWEjH9E[/ame]

 

[Kop]

I was at a New Years Eve party a few years back and my older sister decided she wanted to try my Sierra Nevada Torpedo. Her face crunched up in disgust as she proclaimed: "It tastes like poison from a poisonous poison thing!"

Hmf.

 

[unionrdr]

...I didn't get a harumph from that other guy...@#$@#%$#^%&

 

[masonsjax]

Just last weekend my mother was telling me how barley upsets he stomach and she can't eat beef and barley soup, as she's drinking her miller light.
She also claims to be lactose intolerant but half the cheeses and things she claims give her trouble don't contain lactose, and every time I talk to her she has another story of how she accidentally ate butter or something and miraculously didn't have any reaction.

She probably has problems with FODMAPs. Many people do, but the majority these days are convinced the problem is gluten intolerance, because the GF diet is so heavily marketed and cutting out gluten incidentally eliminates many of the major sources of FODMAP sugars from the standard american diet.

Oh wait, that wasn't funny at all. Sorry.

 

[unionrdr]

Or they just can't bare the thought of killing all those lil baby plants in the center of the kernel...the "gluten". Wussies.

 

[thatjonguy]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4jMWWEjH9E

I was hoping that would be the clip from inside Papa Johns...

 

[rlmiller10]

What is even more scary, is that when trappers talk about beaver caster they mean the actual gland the but juice comes from! We use them dried and ground up to make lures for many different fur bearers.

Wow, all sorts here on the forum. It has been 25 years since I set steel but I still get trapper magazine just as a reminder. Not that many people in the US trap, and not many brew in the overall population. Figure the overlap in those data sets has to quite small.

 

[unionrdr]

When I was in auto tech in high school, I had classmates that trapped muskrat in Elyria. I think some of their parents made wine, but I'm the only brewer I guess.

 

[Fedora]

Wow, all sorts here on the forum. It has been 25 years since I set steel but I still get trapper magazine just as a reminder. Not that many people in the US trap, and not many brew in the overall population. Figure the overlap in those data sets has to quite small.

I've trapped, but only to eliminate nuisance beaver.

 

[unionrdr]

^Is that anything like kicking dirty babies???

 

[Fedora]

^^ With steel toed sneakers. **** yea!

I was raised on a farm.The beaver dam the creeks and it floods the bottoms. That's the best grazing/ hay fields. Kill 'em! Kill 'em all!

 

[unionrdr]

Yup. Let God sort'em out! Yeah, they dammed up some of my best fishin' holes as well. Had to get rid of it on the neighbor's side in PA. Nice trout fishing in the deep hole in the creek across the Drake Highway.

 

[masonsjax]

When I was in auto tech in high school, I had classmates that trapped muskrat in Elyria. I think some of their parents made wine, but I'm the only brewer I guess.

Auto tech? They had cars back then?!

 

[unionrdr]

Yeah, flintmobile GT's. Flint wrenches & bearskins. And the chimney 'top my roof isa made outta human skulls!

 

[Billy-Klubb]

on the topic of beavers: my maternal grandpa made live beaver traps. after retiring as the head electrician at his local VA, then a small time rancher, he bought into the Hancock Trap Co. and built those things for about a decade.


on the beer note: last night my MIL kept asking if I had any "light beer". lady, how many years you known me? how many times you seen me with a light beer (by your odd standards)? I offered her some of that ancient BL they left with us. she passed on that.

 

[Kirkwooder]

Wow, all sorts here on the forum. It has been 25 years since I set steel but I still get trapper magazine just as a reminder. Not that many people in the US trap, and not many brew in the overall population. Figure the overlap in those data sets has to quite small.

I'm proud to say that this is my 30th year trapping. I wish I learned to brew back then too! I love to do both! :rockin:


I also have a coon hound! I must be nuts!

 

[unionrdr]

I had a red tick coon hound that was the son of two Grand Night Champions.

 

[Kirkwooder]

My blue tick is out of the same litter as the 2011 national grad champion. He's pretty good, but he isn't anywhere near that good. LoL. He finds me a few coon every year.

 

[unionrdr]

When mine was a pup, he used to see the neighbor's cat coming into HIS territory ( cue Sepultura territory here). He'd look at me, wagging his little tail, as if to say " can I huh? Huh? Oh please"! I'd say, " git'em boy" & he'd tree the cat in the fur tree next to the back porch, howling in his little puppy voice. That was really cool.:rockin:

 

[krackin]

Corn on the cob is the best beaver bait. Beaver is the best bear bait, outside of standing corn and bee hives. I got my first trapping license 44 years ago.

That was about the time my sidekick and I came across some home brew his dad and uncle made, which keeps this beer related.

 

[ubnserved]

But mine kept the mice out of my brewing stuff. One cat we had used to kill & eat snakes & large spiders in & around the house when we had babies around. One time, my wife had our daughter in her stroller while working on flower beds outside. A young black snake crawled up the leg of the stroller. Tigger literally tore it a new one!

My son found a spider in the house the other day and points it out to the cat. This cat is so dumb it paws at it a couple of times then wants petted . He points to the spider walking away. Sniffs it and walked away wanting more petting. After about the 5 time of point and paw we give up and step on it. The only thing that this cat likes is to play fetch and be petted. When I call her I whistle and say come here puppy. During the day she will randomly bring things (usually folded pieces of paper or receipts) and want me to throw them so she can fetch them. I'm dreading the day when it is a mouse. :cross:

 

[ubnserved]

I believe it was the anal gland for the raspberry. which is now the reason I had to give up on of my favorite hard candies.

How in the hell can it possibly be easier to chase down a beaver and milk a bit of juice out of its anus and do this repeatedly? And now that you have pissed off the beaver by grabbing its ass a few times how can you manage to get a hold of it without getting bit by those big ass teeth? Wouldn't it just be easier to grow some damn berries and maybe have Billy Klubb come and punch them. Also maybe tastier!

 

[Billy-Klubb]

How in the hell can it possibly be easier to chase down a beaver and milk a bit of juice out of its anus and do this repeatedly? And now that you have pissed off the beaver by grabbing its ass a few times how can you manage to get a hold of it without getting bit by those big ass teeth? Wouldn't it just be easier to grow some damn berries and maybe have Billy Klubb come and punch them. Also maybe tastier!

but my FIL doesn't like the seeds in the berries. and that, as I have found out, is a fact.

 

[Kirkwooder]

How in the hell can it possibly be easier to chase down a beaver and milk a bit of juice out of its anus and do this repeatedly? And now that you have pissed off the beaver by grabbing its ass a few times how can you manage to get a hold of it without getting bit by those big ass teeth? Wouldn't it just be easier to grow some damn berries and maybe have Billy Klubb come and punch them. Also maybe tastier!

I hear the that the beavers grow to like it and come runnin when you call, after a spell that is. It's tricky at first though, at least that's what I hear. LoL

 

[krackin]

I hear the that the beavers grow to like it and come runnin when you call, after a spell that is. It's tricky at first though, at least that's what I hear. LoL

Like I said, my first license was a few years back. I'm just not up to running them up to corral like we used to. I remember those herds of 15 to 20 thousand and all we had to do was squeeze butt.

 

[AdamBomb]

Wow, all sorts here on the forum. It has been 25 years since I set steel but I still get trapper magazine just as a reminder. Not that many people in the US trap, and not many brew in the overall population. Figure the overlap in those data sets has to quite small.

That's really is funny, I'm a trapper too!

 

[Kirkwooder]

Like I said, my first license was a few years back. I'm just not up to running them up to corral like we used to. I remember those herds of 15 to 20 thousand and all we had to do was squeeze butt.

Chasing beaver will keep you young, or if you've been out of it for a while it will make you feel young once again.

*Disclaimer* I am not a doctor but I did meet a guy, that knew a guy, that had gone to the doctor once. Or maybe he stayed at a Holliday Inn or something.