Funny things you've overheard about beer

[mattd2]

BEST

EVER


...wait, why is that little guy looking so angry

 

[BigDaddyBeard]

I like how my little story rolled into what it did. Spiraled a little out of control

 

[ElCid79]

My favorite is when you here someone trying to be a beer snob that clearly has no idea what they are talking about.....

 

[Billy-Klubb]

My favorite is when you here someone trying to be a beer snob that clearly has no idea what they are talking about.....

like, "Killian's Irish Red is a great craft beer." and "There is no beer darker than Guinness.":smack:

 

[JoeyChopps]

like, "Killian's Irish Red is a great craft beer." and "There is no beer darker than Guinness.":smack:[/QUOTE

Or Guinness is a meal in a glass. I try to explain how little calories and alcohol is in Guinness and everyone always thinks I'm crazy. My fav is in south ga everyone loves cold beer. When I explain I like craft they say I like warm beer.

 

[bergen69]

Actually it took years

I was seaman first class on a Philippine fishing vessel. We'd go out months at a time just 6 men out in the open ocean. We had nothing better to do so wed have contests. Who was the fastest, most aggressive, biggest mess, etc. I was the best at it most would have their arms give out after 2 batches or couldn't handle the floppy ones. There was one guy though he'd give me a go. When we'd go at it everyone would stop to watch us. We'd go all night some times. The worst part was the clean up though. The mess was sticky and smelled and got every where. Luckily the cabin boy could get in all the cracks with his wand and give them a good scrubbing

Well actually...

 

[ChshreCat]

That is all.

 

[Halbrust]

Cat, I don't get it

 

[zmanzorro]

Can we agree that all off-topics must at least be funny or about beer? Not neither, like economics ...

 

[CGVT]

Can we agree that all off-topics must at least be funny or about beer? Not neither, like economics ...

Neither funny, nor about beer ^^^^^^

 

[GrogNerd]

Neither funny, nor about beer ^^^^^^

nor economics

 

[Leadgolem]

Oh, I don't know. The rap song about economics was pretty funny.

 

[Black Island Brewer]

That is all.

You owe me one keyboard, now covered in Edwort's Apfelwein.

 

[n240sxguy]

Here's a kinda funny, but extremely stupid thing that happened to me today. I was leaving Kroger today with my wife, 3 yo daughter, 1 yo son, and my wife's brother. We've got the car packed up, and my wife hands me a drink to give to my daughter in the back seat before I get in. It's a clear glass bottle containing a cucumber melon carbonated drink. I take a swig of it, pass it to my daughter, then get in the suv. As I'm getting ready to back out I see a white honda accord with some dumb blonde creeping along super slow behind me staring at us. I look around, then look back and she's still creeping along staring at us. I ask my wife if she knows her or something. She says no. Look back, and she's finally out of the way and heading down the next row. My wife says she's probably calling the cops on us because she thinks we are drinking and driving. I said that's ridiculous. I pull out and head toward the exit. I'm behind her. She pulls over out of the way, so I punch it to get away from the staring psycho. She pulls up behind us. I go left, she goes right. We went right up the street to go to walmart. My wife had to run in, and I told her I'd wait in the car for the police to show up. I turn on my police scanner app on my phone to see if she really did call the cops. A minute goes by, then I hear my car description and plate number along with our descriptions over the police band. It said we were both drinking bud light in the Kroger parking lot, then where we had headed from there. WTF!!! Are you kidding me!!! So I call 911. I tell the dispatcher what I just heard over the radio, and that I was not drinking bud light, I was drinking a cucumber melon drink in a clear glass bottle, and that she should call the lady back and tell her she was an idiot. She laughed and said thank you.

WTF is going on in this country when you can't drink anything from a glass bottle without the police being called? It wasn't even an amber bottle! It was clear with clear liquid in it. I am still pissed! Stupid people!

 

[GrogNerd]

I live in northern Vergina

 

[jhoneycutt]

Here's a kinda funny, but extremely stupid thing that happened to me today. I was leaving Kroger today with my wife, 3 yo daughter, 1 yo son, and my wife's brother. We've got the car packed up, and my wife hands me a drink to give to my daughter in the back seat before I get in. It's a clear glass bottle containing a cucumber melon carbonated drink. I take a swig of it, pass it to my daughter, then get in the suv. As I'm getting ready to back out I see a white honda accord with some dumb blonde creeping along super slow behind me staring at us. I look around, then look back and she's still creeping along staring at us. I ask my wife if she knows her or something. She says no. Look back, and she's finally out of the way and heading down the next row. My wife says she's probably calling the cops on us because she thinks we are drinking and driving. I said that's ridiculous. I pull out and head toward the exit. I'm behind her. She pulls over out of the way, so I punch it to get away from the staring psycho. She pulls up behind us. I go left, she goes right. We went right up the street to go to walmart. My wife had to run in, and I told her I'd wait in the car for the police to show up. I turn on my police scanner app on my phone to see if she really did call the cops. A minute goes by, then I hear my car description and plate number along with our descriptions over the police band. It said we were both drinking bud light in the Kroger parking lot, then where we had headed from there. WTF!!! Are you kidding me!!! So I call 911. I tell the dispatcher what I just heard over the radio, and that I was not drinking bud light, I was drinking a cucumber melon drink in a clear glass bottle, and that she should call the lady back and tell her she was an idiot. She laughed and said thank you.

WTF is going on in this country when you can't drink anything from a glass bottle without the police being called? It wasn't even an amber bottle! It was clear with clear liquid in it. I am still pissed! Stupid people!

So she didn't care that you also passed what she thought was an alcoholic beverage to your kid? Lol she really is an idiot huh...

 

[JoeyChopps]

This reminded of a time I went to my grandmothers and I had a 24oz Arizona tea. I like the energy blend that comes in a goldish can. My grandmother was really pissy and standoffish from me while I was over sipping on it. Finally I said grandma what's the deal are you upset with me? She says I can't believe you have the nerve to walk around my house drinking a coors tall boy. ( my grandfather drank coors banquet on occasion). I said grandma it's tea. She didn't believe me until I poured some of the yellowish cloud liquid from the can and let her taste it.

 

[drainbamage]

So she didn't care that you also passed what she thought was an alcoholic beverage to your kid? Lol she really is an idiot huh...

Yeah, that's where I thought it was going too. That or, "yes officer, it was a clear beverage in a clear bottle. I'm fairly certain he was drinking a Smirnoff Ice...arrest that man!"

 

[WesleyS]

This one time, I was drinking a beer while driving and this person in another car thought it was a soda. What an idiot.

 

[Powhatan]

I live in northern Vergina

I live in central Vergina!

 

[unionrdr]

My family's from West Vergina!

 

[BeerGrylls]

As soon as I laid my two fingers on it and opened it up, you should've smelled, seen, and tasted the wretchedness the came forth from that Vergina.

 

[unionrdr]

I don't think I'm even gunna touch that...

 

[splattsmier]

I don't think I'm even gunna touch that...

I wouldn't either...not without protection, anyway, and WAY TOO MANY homebrews.

 

[rhoop]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6LehaqPlAI&feature=youtube_gdata_player


Hahahaha, so true

 

[bleme]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6LehaqPlAI&feature=youtube_gdata_player Hahahaha, so true

I don't get it. Is it saying you have to go to Canada to get good beer? That you have to go to Canada to find polite people? That you have to go to Canada to find impolite people?

It seems to be an advertisement for something but I can't tell what it is selling or figure who it's market might be.

 

[Swarley88]

Actually it took years

I was seaman first class on a Philippine fishing vessel. We'd go out months at a time just 6 men out in the open ocean. We had nothing better to do so wed have contests. Who was the fastest, most aggressive, biggest mess, etc. I was the best at it most would have their arms give out after 2 batches or couldn't handle the floppy ones. There was one guy though he'd give me a go. When we'd go at it everyone would stop to watch us. We'd go all night some times. The worst part was the clean up though. The mess was sticky and smelled and got every where. Luckily the cabin boy could get in all the cracks with his wand and give them a good scrubbing

Of course it's about fishing what else would it be. Bi Gung Dong was strange but a good guy and one heck of a fisherman. His dream was to hunt sperm whale on Uranus, for some reason he thought there would be a lot there. He had a female monkey and a male chicken. Unfortunately he had to spank his monkey sometimes for choking his chicken. Unfortunately he died a few years ago when his uncle jack was horse riding. When he was helping his uncle jack off the horse his cock got lose and spat both of them in the eyes and he went blind and the monkey got caught in his pearl necklace and choked him

That is all.

Catching up on this thread has made my day.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6LehaqPlAI&feature=youtube_gdata_player


Hahahaha, so true

excuse me while I clear my throat. chghmmm ehgrehmmmmm! It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it's told or it gets the hose again.

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Here's a kinda funny, but extremely stupid thing that happened to me today. I was leaving Kroger today with my wife, 3 yo daughter, 1 yo son, and my wife's brother. We've got the car packed up, and my wife hands me a drink to give to my daughter in the back seat before I get in. It's a clear glass bottle containing a cucumber melon carbonated drink. I take a swig of it, pass it to my daughter, then get in the suv. As I'm getting ready to back out I see a white honda accord with some dumb blonde creeping along super slow behind me staring at us. I look around, then look back and she's still creeping along staring at us. I ask my wife if she knows her or something. She says no. Look back, and she's finally out of the way and heading down the next row. My wife says she's probably calling the cops on us because she thinks we are drinking and driving. I said that's ridiculous. I pull out and head toward the exit. I'm behind her. She pulls over out of the way, so I punch it to get away from the staring psycho. She pulls up behind us. I go left, she goes right. We went right up the street to go to walmart. My wife had to run in, and I told her I'd wait in the car for the police to show up. I turn on my police scanner app on my phone to see if she really did call the cops. A minute goes by, then I hear my car description and plate number along with our descriptions over the police band. It said we were both drinking bud light in the Kroger parking lot, then where we had headed from there. WTF!!! Are you kidding me!!! So I call 911. I tell the dispatcher what I just heard over the radio, and that I was not drinking bud light, I was drinking a cucumber melon drink in a clear glass bottle, and that she should call the lady back and tell her she was an idiot. She laughed and said thank you.

WTF is going on in this country when you can't drink anything from a glass bottle without the police being called? It wasn't even an amber bottle! It was clear with clear liquid in it. I am still pissed! Stupid people!

The most offensive part about this post is the accusation that you would drink Bud Light on purpose.

 

[jhoneycutt]

Went to Buffalo Wild Wings Friday evening. Under craft and specialty beers that had bud select and bud select 55 listed along with other similar carbonated beverages. Hmmm