Engagement Rings-how much did it set you back?

[Alamo_Beer]

Read this:
http://www.un.org/peace/africa/Diamond.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conflict_diamond

Watch Ice Road Truckers.

Repeat: If you a buy a diamond, the terrorists win or a trucker dies.

Is it really worth it?

Might work.

Yeah, I brought that up about a year ago. Didn't fly.

I thought it might though bc she's quick to talk about being veggie and stuff like that.

 

[Buford]

Ha, yeah "yellow" gold is deffinatly out...I know what already. She's pale like Buford was saying about his wife

Not married... yet. That's next year :fro:

White gold is an option, but for now we're sticking with silver. I have one as well. My take on it is if I'm buying gold, it had better be in the form of Krugerrands and going in my bank box Diamonds... she hates 'em.

We're definitely going cheap on wedding stuff. The rental for the whole place we were going to be using was going to be around $1800 but her mother wanted to change the date to a more expensive day so she's covering the difference. Food - cheap catering from a local restaurant, music - iPod with a playlist hooked up to speakers, beer - I'm making it. Even the dress she's looking at is not too bad price-wise. Only part we haven't really come up with a plan for yet is a photographer... and that might hurt.

 

[gman]

Seriously, engagement rings should be "what you can afford now" or "wait to buy".

If she loves you, she'll understand that you still spent a good chunk of your available cash on her.

Try really really hard not to go into debt for it (though marriage could be considered a form of debt...j/k).

 

[rdwj]

Here is a real annoying story...

I paid a decent buck for my wife's ring and it's pretty nice looking. When she got pregnant, her fingers began to swell and she couldn't wear it anymore. Since she didn't want to look like an unwed mother, she borrowed her mother’s cheapo cubic zirconia.

She got more compliments on that stupid ring in a few months than the DECADE she wore the one I bought!!

She said that if she had to do it over again, she would have asked for a cubic zirconia and used the rest of the money to put towards our first house.

...I think she's lying, but I guess it's nice of her to say anyway.

 

[gman]

Not married... yet. That's next year :fro:

White gold is an option, but for now we're sticking with silver. I have one as well. My take on it is if I'm buying gold, it had better be in the form of Krugerrands and going in my bank box Diamonds... she hates 'em.

We're definitely going cheap on wedding stuff. The rental for the whole place we were going to be using was going to be around $1800 but her mother wanted to change the date to a more expensive day so she's covering the difference. Food - cheap catering from a local restaurant, music - iPod with a playlist hooked up to speakers, beer - I'm making it. Even the dress she's looking at is not too bad price-wise. Only part we haven't really come up with a plan for yet is a photographer... and that might hurt.

Define "hurt". You can find "amateur" photographers for about $500.00. You won't get the album, but you get all the pictures, can buy the wedding album and put it together yourselves. The best part is, since you interview them, and look at their work before you hire them, you'll be able to tell if you're getting a bargain.

The food part was the most expensive part of my wedding (3 years ago this month, woot!). I mean, REALLY expensive. We went with a local place as well, but we had a lot of people show up.

 

[Alamo_Beer]

Only part we haven't really come up with a plan for yet is a photographer... and that might hurt.

My parents are wedding photographers....it's REALLY not hard. If you have a friend interested in photography at all or can take decent pictures then you're good to go.

The main thing is to know what shots to get:

Engagement pics in "plain" clothes

Pre-wedding pics of her and her brides maids & him and his groomsmen

Wedding shots: walking down the isle, parties on both sides, kiss

Post-wedding shots: both families together

Reception pics: first dance, cake, throwing flowers, limo


I like the ipod idea.....my girlfriend wants to get a band

 

[chillHayze]

Just wait til you have children

"It's cheaper to keep 'er" - A blatant lie!!

 

[Alamo_Beer]

Here is a real annoying story...

I paid a decent buck for my wife's ring and it's pretty nice looking. When she got pregnant, her fingers began to swell and she couldn't wear it anymore. Since she didn't want to look like an unwed mother, she borrowed her mother’s cheapo cubic zirconia.

She got more compliments on that stupid ring in a few months than the DECADE she wore the one I bought!!

She said that if she had to do it over again, she would have asked for a cubic zirconia and used the rest of the money to put towards our first house.

...I think she's lying, but I guess it's nice of her to say anyway.

That sucks

In all honesty my girlfriend I know WANTS a diamond and a nice ring and all of that but in the long run I think she'd rather have money to start a future when we graduate

 

[joebou4860]

Here is a hint from when I was shopping for it. When you find about the size you want drop it a tad and you will pay a lot less e.g. if you want a full ct. look at the .9 ish ct stones. you pay a lot more to be able to say you have a specific size. This also works around the 1/2 ct, and 3/4 ct sizes

 

[Alamo_Beer]

Hey thats a really good idea..

is it wrong if I look on ebay?

 

[Vermicous]

Starting Rant:

De beers can burn in hell. The company that is responsible for making a worthless hunk of carbon into one of the highest priced gemstones is also responsible for 100 years of murder and blackmail. "A Diamond is Forever" and "Two Month's Salary" are both ad campaigns designed to keep a secondary market down and prices up. At one time, this company was responsible for 80% of diamond mining and 95% of diamond sales. They fixed prices and kept supply low to create more demand. While not as controlling as before, they still control 40% of diamond mining and 50% of sales.

Your great-grandparents considered diamonds less valuable than glass for jewelry, I urge everyone to continue that tradition. Emeralds, rubies, and sapphires; anything but diamonds.

End Rant;

I worked for a jewelry wholesaler for a number of years and heard many stories and read some good books. If possible, find an independent jeweler. The price will probably be the same, but the piece will be copied less.

My wife didn't listen to my rant either, insisted on a diamond. But my company sold me the diamond at cost, a three thousand dollar ring for three hundred dollars.

 

[chillHayze]

Hey thats a really good idea..

is it wrong if I look on ebay?

Look? Yes. ...But I'd stay away from buying such an expensive ring on ebay. When it comes to shiny expensive things, pictures just don't cut it. Need to see the real thing to be sure it's right. You may luck out, but not something I'd leave to chance.

 

[Vermicous]

Some companies put overruns on ebay. It's not a bad way to go for price.

 

[chillHayze]

But my company sold me the diamond at cost, a three thousand dollar ring for three hundred dollars.

**Cringes at the gross markup**

If I paid a worker $2 a day and charged $3 a day for pickaxe rental then I, too, would be rich!!

 

[Alamo_Beer]

I was MOSTLY kidding about ebay...

Just read some of the reviews of an ebay jewlry seller. 98% were good but that 2% scares me

 

[chillHayze]

I was MOSTLY kidding about ebay...

Just read some of the reviews of an ebay jewlry seller. 98% were good but that 2% scares me

I have bought 2 rings on ebay, had good luck on both. They were both under $70. If you do decide to use ebay, have the seller send you more pictures, in different light, at different angles, on a finger. It sounds wierd, but if they are willing to do that then they deserve your business i suppose.

 

[dibby33]

I might have to post in the "Big Snip" thread about an unwanted vasectamy if I get a cubic zurconium

Yeup, let me know how that goes!

 

[Alamo_Beer]

So, just got home from work and talked to her for awhile. We looked online a bit and decided to go look at some stores this weekend.

*sigh looks like I won't be brewing A WHILE... I threw out my buckets bc I got mad at them and vowed not to brew until I got all of the AG equipment I need. About a month ago I got a raise and thought I'd be brewing in no time. Well, it'll probubly be this time next year when I do my next brew! I'll have to get some better bottles and just crank out apfelwein.

I brought up the idea of an engagement "something" for me....showed my girlfriend the B3-250 system (a steal at only $895) and she said "I don't have that kind of money!" Made me laugh bc the rings she likes are 2-3k

Thanks for all the help guys, really do apprechiate it.

 

[dibby33]

You need a slush fund. Every married man has one. Stick a few bucks away each week and slowly build it up. Then lie blatently about where you get the new brew equipment from. "There was this guy at work that knew somebody that..."

If the slush fund is discovered (cash, not bank accounts please) then you can just say that you were saving for a surprise but it is ruined now. Put the slushfund somewhere that she would not look. This may be difficult due to the nature of the other party active in the vicinity, so to speak!

I normally just use mine to buy beer and ingredients but one of my mates actually bought a boat with his! Cash in hand jobs, gotta love 'em

 

[Alamo_Beer]

You need a slush fund. Every married man has one. Stick a few bucks away each week and slowly build it up. Then lie blatently about where you get the new brew equipment from. "There was this guy at work that knew somebody that..."

If the slush fund is discovered (cash, not bank accounts please) then you can just say that you were saving for a surprise but it is ruined now. Put the slushfund somewhere that she would not look. This may be difficult due to the nature of the other party active in the vicinity, so to speak!

I normally just use mine to buy beer and ingredients but one of my mates actually bought a boat with his! Cash in hand jobs, gotta love 'em

Man, thats why I love this forum....I learn all the things my dad wouldn't tell me... There's no way in hell I'd ask my dad about engagement rings, and there's no way he'd ever teach me about slush funds...

Thanks dibby, It may only be $4 a week but I'll start mine today.

 

[phooka]

You need a slush fund. Every married man has one. Stick a few bucks away each week and slowly build it up. Then lie blatently about where you get the new brew equipment from. "There was this guy at work that knew somebody that..."

Bah.. I'm on #2 (Sooooo much better). We determined way up front to keep $ separate. Separate accounts, etc. We pool for bills but what's ours is ours and it stays what way. It creates one less MAJOR point of contention - I recommend it for everyone.

OnT: First marriage ring was < $500 (and that was too Fn much). Second was less than $2k from bluenile.com (no affiliations or interests). Yah, I'm a cheap ass.

It isn't that I don't have $. I just am really conflicted about buying what is effectively compressed dirt for ridiculous prices..


dale

 

[MriswitH]

I spent about $2100 on the ring. I had it custom made and total carat weight is about 1ct. Its a princess cut center stone, flanked by a smaller princess cut on each side and 2-baguettes on each side as well.

As others have stated, you don't need to cash in your retirement to pay for a ring. Make sure you shop around and go to stores that are outside of the average mall store. Make sure you do your homework and are up on stuff like clarity, clarity-enhanced, color, etc.

We have finally decided to just do a very basic wedding with the rents to save money so that we can spend the brunt of it on our honeymoon. (2-weeks in Europe/Ireland/England )

 

[megavites]

Like others have said, wait till you see the wedding bill.:cross:
When I did the deed, I had recently bought a 92 Ford Explorer and had
an 88 Mustang LX for sale. I let it go for $4000, and got
a great ring for $3500. Got engaged on a cruise.
Spent even more on the honeymoon, as she really wanted to go to Alaska.
So we did a pretty cool 10 day trip staying in some remote places.:rockin:

 

[Yuri_Rage]

I highly recommend doing what a few others have mentioned - find a setting you like, find a diamond for the right price, and pay a third party to put it all together.

I got the rock from this company through Air Force connections (click on the "Zoomie" link if you're a USAFA grad). It was a decent price for a VERY good quality diamond.

The setting was from Mondera. It was relatively inexpensive since there was no diamond in it.

I had a local jeweler put it together for around $100.

The ring below looks almost identical to hers. I paid around $4500 total, and she won't tell me what it appraised for out of embarrassment that she owns something that's potentially so valuable (apparently it approaches or exceeds 5 figures). She gets nothing but compliments on it whenever she's out with her girly friends.

 

[the_bird]

FWIW, Blue Nile included an appraisal that supposedly was an objective third party, valuing the wife's $3,000 ring at a bit north of $5,000. If you insist on doing it online, I can vouch for them; I'd buy from them again.

 

[Janx]

Lucked out...she had a family ring from her grandmother. Just had to get it re-set/sized for a few hundred. My band was a few hundred. Wedding was on the cheap too other than flying to and staying in Hawaii for two weeks.

Congrats and cheers

 

[EvilTOJ]

Me and SWMBO were so broke going out, wifey didn't even get an engagement ring until five years after we were married. Our wedding bands together cost us a total of $500.

I see the markups on jewelry all the time (I have access to their sales screens )and if it came to paying 1000% markup on a brand-new diamond, or buying one from a pawn shop, BUY AN ENGAGEMENT RING FROM A PAWN SHOP!!!!! It is the same gold, the same diamonds, and it costs 1/10th of what you pay in a jewelry store. Gold doesn't rot, Diamonds don't get dingy! Get her size, go get one she'll like from a pawn shop or even a jewelry pawn shop, get some of your BKF and toothpaste and polish that bad boy up. Don't listen to DeBeers, don't listen to the marketing saying you have to spend your life savings on a shiney. If she loves you for who you are and she's not a materialistic hobag she'll love the ring for how it looks, not what you paid for it!

One thing my wife and I both love about each other is when we get high end gifts, AND get a really good deal on it. I don't *think* she'd buy stolen goods, but if the price was right.....

OK I'm done ranting.

 

[EdWort]

Actually a beer tab from a collectors "Lone Star Beer Can" is the best thing for a ring!

The two months salary is such a scam. I spent $1,500 twenty-five years ago on SWMBO's ring, but then again, I was only 22 years old. Some folks may make fun of the size of the marquee diamond, but then again we've been married to each other for 23 years and it gets better every year. A big rock means nothing without the stability, commitment & integrity of the union of marriage.

(don't ask me about anniversary diamonds though)

 

[Llarian]

Read this:
http://www.un.org/peace/africa/Diamond.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conflict_diamond

Watch Ice Road Truckers.

Repeat: If you a buy a diamond, the terrorists win or a trucker dies.

Is it really worth it?

Might work.

Unfortunatly, conflict free diamonds are a booming business these days and easy to find, so that's not a very good out anymore.

-D

[EDIT: Just to be clear, unfortunate for your pocketbook, I think its great they're available. I also think its great my girlfriend was a sapphire primary stone instead of a diamond. =) ]

 

[Lil' Sparky]

I think I only paid about $500 for her engagement ring. It was just a simple solitaire. That was in 1993 and I was 19 years old. Her wedding ring was much nicer and cost ~ $2.5K, but we got it at cost (Mom worked at a jewelry store) and she's very petite, so those gianormous rings look rediculous on her hand. We ended up getting the diamond from her engagement ring set as a pendant for a necklace since she would never wear it again otherwise.

Honestly I think spending a fortune and/or getting into a lot of dept over an engagement or wedding ring isn't worth it.