Brewpastor
Beer, not rocket chemistry
The Royal Bank of Canada sent this to me. I pass it along for the beterment of the world and more importantly, this forum:
The Duty of Civility
Civility means a great deal more than just being nice to one another; it is the lubricant that keeps a society running smoothly. So vital is it, in fact, that some philosophers say that we have a duty to act civilly - especially here in Canada, where we must live with diversity...
On first examination, a person would never guess how important civility is to human affairs. One dictionary writes it off as mere good manners. Another says that the word refers especially to cold and formal politeness. Yet another suggests that it is little more than acting in a way that is not outrightly rude.
By these standards, one might conclude that civility is best exemplified by the polished hypocrisy of a diplomat in an unfriendly capital or the supercilious correctness of a waiter in a pricey Paris restaurant. But when you consider it in practice, you realize that the lexicographers have settled for woefully incomplete definitions. It is as though they had wrestled long and hard with the immense scope and weight of the concept, and given up in their efforts to pin it down.
Instead of exploring the crucial role of civility in social and political life, the lexicographers have concentrated on how it carries less personal warmth than other social graces. So it often does: but if civil men and women tend to be reserved, it is because they scrupulously avoid intruding into or interfering with other people's business. Another factor that tends to render their manner less than familiar is that civility is usually directed towards people one hardly knows or does not know at all.
As we can see from looking at the first part of the word, civility is a form of public, as opposed to private, behavior. The adjective "civil" refers to citizenship, so that civility, or the lack of it, governs the approach of one citizen to the rest of the citizenry. Its presence or absence has a profound effect on the character of any society. It goes a long way towards making the difference between a pleasant and a not-so-pleasant place to live.
The difficulty in bringing it into focus seems to lie in thinking of it as a single personal quality like politeness, whereas it is actually an amalgam of several such qualities. True, it begins with the inculcation and exercise of good manners, but not just any kind of manners, certainly not the snobbish kind designed to shut people out of one's own circle or to assert one's presumed superiority. The best manners, it has been said, are tailored to the occasion and the recipients. The key to civility is in trying to make everyone you encounter day-by-day feel at ease.
In any case, manners are only the most visible manifestation of what is less of a code of conduct than a spirit. That spirit encompasses consideration, tact, good humour, and respect for others' feelings and rights. Perhaps the one word that comes closest to summing it up is "obliging." It is a variation on the golden rule, urging that you treat everyone as decently and considerately as you would like to be treated yourself.
We may be better able to grasp what it is all about by putting aside the dictionaries and turning to a fanciful example. The celebrated 18th century English preacher Richard Cecil told the story of two goats who met on a bridge which was too narrow for either to pass or turn back. When one goat lay down to let the other walk over him, civility was born.
Such self-effacement calls for self-restraint; and it is at this point that we can see that the link between civility and civilization is more than just etymological. People might think of a civilized community as one in which there is a refined culture. Not necessarily; first and foremost it is one in which the mass of people subdue their selfish instincts in favour of the common wellbeing.
Think of it in the negative: in an uncivilized society, the stronger and more cunning individuals pursue their own impulses and desires to the limit, riding roughshod over their weaker fellows. In contrast, civilized societies live by a set of customs and laws which, imperfect though they may be, are fundamentally designed to strike a rough balance between the stronger and the weaker. The laws themselves, however, are less important than a public disposition to obey them, and this stems largely from the spirit of civility.
The democratic system presupposes civil conduct in our courts and elected bodies. More generally, civility calls upon us to make an effort to see the other person's point of view, and to try to resolve differences democratically. It allows us to engage in dialogues with those whose ideas we oppose in a non-aggressive fashion. This leads to attempts to reconcile disagreements by seeking and moving towards common ground.
That great expert on manners, Lord Chesterfield, once remarked that "mutual complaisances, attentions, and sacrifices of little conveniences" are at the heart of an "implied contract" among civilized people. In a country like Canada, people on the whole abide by a tacit agreement to hold back from doing as they please if it is in opposition to what is deemed best for the whole society.
"What I love about Canada is its civility," the famed American-born urbanologist Jane Jacobs once said. "There's always a willingness to talk things out with reasonable politeness." And indeed Canadians have long been noted for their civil ways, to the point where it has become something of a caricature. When you step on a Canadian's toes, an American comedian once observed, he apologizes. No doubt the public politeness of Canadians is exaggerated in foreign eyes, but the fact remains that it has helped them to make the compromises necessary to build an enviable nation out of competing regional and cultural interests with a minimum of rancour and strife.
The question is: is civility slipping away from us? In an article in the University of Toronto Magazine based on his book A Civil Tongue: Justice, Dialogue, and the Politics of Pluralism, Mark Kingwell, assistant professor of philosophy at Scarborough College, described returning to Toronto after a number of years abroad to witness "scuffles on sidewalks, brutal exchanges on the bus, people losing their cool in the Eaton Centre." In his absence, Canadian politics had also grown more rough and nasty, leading him to worry that "we are in danger of losing our sense that civility matters. [It] is an increasingly fragile aspect of our national life, a virtue in danger of going out of style permanently."
If civility really is in danger of going out of style, it is largely because of what is nowin style in our popular culture. In the name of personal freedom, people here have long since accepted that anything goes, as long as it is not clearly identified as a criminal offence. This is partly a reaction to traditional social strictures which stifled individual expression and helped to maintain the domination of elites in our society. Be that as it may, the ethos of "letting it all hang out" has dealt a heavy blow to civility, because it is just the opposite of self-restraint.
When it started in the 1960s, one of the guiding notions of the social liberation movement was that people should give vent to their feelings. That in itself is good, but it seems to have been misinterpreted by the entertainment media, which can be expected to influence the attitude of the public at large.
They seized upon it to confront the public with wild demonstrations of rage, an emotion that makes for spectacular action in movies, television and stage plays. In a typical scene, the hero of a movie cannot get what he wants in a restaurant, so he overturns the table and sends the plates and glasses flying. The audience laughs indulgently. The underlying message is that it is all right _ even glamorous _ to relieve your frustrations by smashing things and generally raising hell.
Sheer rudeness, too, has acquired a certain chic. In recent years the media have raised boorishness to an art form. The hip heroes of movies today deliver gratuitous put-downs to ridicule and belittle anyone who gets in their way. Bad manners, apparently, make a saleable commodity. Television situation comedies wallow in vulgarity, stand-up comedians base their acts on insults to their audiences, and talk show hosts become rich and famous by snarling at callers and hectoring guests. (continued...)
The Duty of Civility
Civility means a great deal more than just being nice to one another; it is the lubricant that keeps a society running smoothly. So vital is it, in fact, that some philosophers say that we have a duty to act civilly - especially here in Canada, where we must live with diversity...
On first examination, a person would never guess how important civility is to human affairs. One dictionary writes it off as mere good manners. Another says that the word refers especially to cold and formal politeness. Yet another suggests that it is little more than acting in a way that is not outrightly rude.
By these standards, one might conclude that civility is best exemplified by the polished hypocrisy of a diplomat in an unfriendly capital or the supercilious correctness of a waiter in a pricey Paris restaurant. But when you consider it in practice, you realize that the lexicographers have settled for woefully incomplete definitions. It is as though they had wrestled long and hard with the immense scope and weight of the concept, and given up in their efforts to pin it down.
Instead of exploring the crucial role of civility in social and political life, the lexicographers have concentrated on how it carries less personal warmth than other social graces. So it often does: but if civil men and women tend to be reserved, it is because they scrupulously avoid intruding into or interfering with other people's business. Another factor that tends to render their manner less than familiar is that civility is usually directed towards people one hardly knows or does not know at all.
As we can see from looking at the first part of the word, civility is a form of public, as opposed to private, behavior. The adjective "civil" refers to citizenship, so that civility, or the lack of it, governs the approach of one citizen to the rest of the citizenry. Its presence or absence has a profound effect on the character of any society. It goes a long way towards making the difference between a pleasant and a not-so-pleasant place to live.
The difficulty in bringing it into focus seems to lie in thinking of it as a single personal quality like politeness, whereas it is actually an amalgam of several such qualities. True, it begins with the inculcation and exercise of good manners, but not just any kind of manners, certainly not the snobbish kind designed to shut people out of one's own circle or to assert one's presumed superiority. The best manners, it has been said, are tailored to the occasion and the recipients. The key to civility is in trying to make everyone you encounter day-by-day feel at ease.
In any case, manners are only the most visible manifestation of what is less of a code of conduct than a spirit. That spirit encompasses consideration, tact, good humour, and respect for others' feelings and rights. Perhaps the one word that comes closest to summing it up is "obliging." It is a variation on the golden rule, urging that you treat everyone as decently and considerately as you would like to be treated yourself.
We may be better able to grasp what it is all about by putting aside the dictionaries and turning to a fanciful example. The celebrated 18th century English preacher Richard Cecil told the story of two goats who met on a bridge which was too narrow for either to pass or turn back. When one goat lay down to let the other walk over him, civility was born.
Such self-effacement calls for self-restraint; and it is at this point that we can see that the link between civility and civilization is more than just etymological. People might think of a civilized community as one in which there is a refined culture. Not necessarily; first and foremost it is one in which the mass of people subdue their selfish instincts in favour of the common wellbeing.
Think of it in the negative: in an uncivilized society, the stronger and more cunning individuals pursue their own impulses and desires to the limit, riding roughshod over their weaker fellows. In contrast, civilized societies live by a set of customs and laws which, imperfect though they may be, are fundamentally designed to strike a rough balance between the stronger and the weaker. The laws themselves, however, are less important than a public disposition to obey them, and this stems largely from the spirit of civility.
The democratic system presupposes civil conduct in our courts and elected bodies. More generally, civility calls upon us to make an effort to see the other person's point of view, and to try to resolve differences democratically. It allows us to engage in dialogues with those whose ideas we oppose in a non-aggressive fashion. This leads to attempts to reconcile disagreements by seeking and moving towards common ground.
That great expert on manners, Lord Chesterfield, once remarked that "mutual complaisances, attentions, and sacrifices of little conveniences" are at the heart of an "implied contract" among civilized people. In a country like Canada, people on the whole abide by a tacit agreement to hold back from doing as they please if it is in opposition to what is deemed best for the whole society.
"What I love about Canada is its civility," the famed American-born urbanologist Jane Jacobs once said. "There's always a willingness to talk things out with reasonable politeness." And indeed Canadians have long been noted for their civil ways, to the point where it has become something of a caricature. When you step on a Canadian's toes, an American comedian once observed, he apologizes. No doubt the public politeness of Canadians is exaggerated in foreign eyes, but the fact remains that it has helped them to make the compromises necessary to build an enviable nation out of competing regional and cultural interests with a minimum of rancour and strife.
The question is: is civility slipping away from us? In an article in the University of Toronto Magazine based on his book A Civil Tongue: Justice, Dialogue, and the Politics of Pluralism, Mark Kingwell, assistant professor of philosophy at Scarborough College, described returning to Toronto after a number of years abroad to witness "scuffles on sidewalks, brutal exchanges on the bus, people losing their cool in the Eaton Centre." In his absence, Canadian politics had also grown more rough and nasty, leading him to worry that "we are in danger of losing our sense that civility matters. [It] is an increasingly fragile aspect of our national life, a virtue in danger of going out of style permanently."
If civility really is in danger of going out of style, it is largely because of what is nowin style in our popular culture. In the name of personal freedom, people here have long since accepted that anything goes, as long as it is not clearly identified as a criminal offence. This is partly a reaction to traditional social strictures which stifled individual expression and helped to maintain the domination of elites in our society. Be that as it may, the ethos of "letting it all hang out" has dealt a heavy blow to civility, because it is just the opposite of self-restraint.
When it started in the 1960s, one of the guiding notions of the social liberation movement was that people should give vent to their feelings. That in itself is good, but it seems to have been misinterpreted by the entertainment media, which can be expected to influence the attitude of the public at large.
They seized upon it to confront the public with wild demonstrations of rage, an emotion that makes for spectacular action in movies, television and stage plays. In a typical scene, the hero of a movie cannot get what he wants in a restaurant, so he overturns the table and sends the plates and glasses flying. The audience laughs indulgently. The underlying message is that it is all right _ even glamorous _ to relieve your frustrations by smashing things and generally raising hell.
Sheer rudeness, too, has acquired a certain chic. In recent years the media have raised boorishness to an art form. The hip heroes of movies today deliver gratuitous put-downs to ridicule and belittle anyone who gets in their way. Bad manners, apparently, make a saleable commodity. Television situation comedies wallow in vulgarity, stand-up comedians base their acts on insults to their audiences, and talk show hosts become rich and famous by snarling at callers and hectoring guests. (continued...)
