We're not talking about diffusion in still water to 6m depth.
You are also over stating the abilities of the yeast to consume all oxygen. The yeast will only consume the O2 when it has dissolved into the beer and when it's actively fermenting. The diffusion process is governed by equilibrium. The yeast will have consumed all of that priming sugar long before all that oxygen has had time to diffuse into the beer. This is why the amount of O2 in the headspace must be meticulously lowered.
There's a reason why commercial beer fillers do a vacuum-co2 purge-vacuum-co2 purge-vacuum-co2 purge process before filling, then force the beer to foam and put a cap onto the foam.
Not the breweries I viewed. The bottles came down a line with their tops exposed to air, then filled and capped.
Have you filled bottles with a bottle wand? That 2 second exposure to O2 is followed by beer being added in a way that agitates and mixes it. The small amount of O2 introduced should have fully diffused into the beer before the bottler had time to cap the beer if it diffuses into beer so quickly as you seem to think. The actively fermenting of the priming sugar takes some time too, it isn't instantaneous.