You're no longer a n00b when...

[billf2112]

I am a newbie but i heard someone at the LHBS say that his wife actually gives him ingredients as Christmas gifts

 

[cruckin78]

#460 When you walk into your LHBS and one of the workers says "Hey it's Trouble 1 and 2"....(referring to my wife and I since we are there so much)

 

[JLem]

#461 You don't read through this entire list to find out if you are a noob still

 

[cenla]

Very much a n00b, but..

#457 you laugh uncontrollably every time some a-hole reporter claims that Four Loko has the alcohol equivalent of four beers

I saw the same article and thought, "it's 60 proof?" (my most recent brew is a baltic porter, 7%abv)

#459 All you have to read in the head is Papizian and Palmer

it reassures me to know I'm not the only one.

 

[slomo]

#462 ur FIL tells you that before he meet you he was perfectly happy with his BMC but now he has to pay 9 dollars for a six pack of commercial beer because BMC is beneath him, and he ran out of your home brew.

#463 swmbo totally agrees and is excited about you buying 110 lbs of grains.

#464 swmbo says we should start a brewery.

 

[specialkaye]

Hey there fellow noob.

#454 you come home from the LHBS and SWMBO greets you with "HELL NO!" You explain that it's a mash paddle, she gets jealous of your MLT and berates you for never buying anything for her.

RFLMAO!
Brought home a piece of wood to make a mash paddle yesterday. I'm thinking: Why can't it do double duty?

 

[krebs119]

I still consider myself a noob, but these things have all happened to me in the past 2 years:

#465 - when buying a new stove for your new kitchen, you spend $500 more on the one with the "ultra boil" setting, knowing you'll only use it for brewing
#466 - After your new dishwasher is installed, your first usage of it is 50 bottles.
#467 - You start asking yourself "how would pineapple taste if I fermented it....?".
#468 - You constantly have 12 tabs open in your browser, and at least 10 are brewing related
#469 - you start telling the bartender at your local bar that their lines aren't clean and all of their beers taste like yogurt
#470 - half of your compost pile in your yard is spent grains and hops.

 

[Frankfurtvr4]

#471 while deployed every email with SWMBO goes something like this.
(you have to read from the bottom up. I'm to lazy to switch it all around)
Ohhhh no your not.
================================================================
Oh if we have a boy I am naming him "Fuggles" (Me)
================================================================
Thanks babe...
================================================================
definatly. Just plan to make them from now on. That kickass fermination you had last weekend was a result of your starter. Rerack the apple at week 4. (Me)

================================================================
Swweet! Going to listen to xmas country and drink too! So should I make the starter tonight?
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

=================================================================
Tomorrow is porter day! (Me)

=================================================================
I have a hard lemonade recipe that will be great for the summer. I would like to try one batch before we unleash it on everyone. You would just put the ingredients on top of the stuff at the bottom of an AW carboy. I will put the recipe together. This one will be quick and easy. I am afraid we may need more kegs and carboys soon.
(Me)

============================================================
I think this last batch of aw was made the 24th- but I could be wrong- will check when I get home
==================================
Is there an aw ready to be reracked? (Me)

==============================
Going to albertsons after work- vanilla beans, apple juice- just going to make aw tomorrow too. Will make yeast starter tonight for stout tomorrow. Do I need anything else?
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

 

[WrongCoastBrewery]

#472 - Prior to the night of going on vacation, you made sure your brew schedule was complete and your beers were bottled and/or kegged before you packed.

#473 - While on said vacation, you run across a homebrew store and decide to stop by to see what they have.

#474 - You call SWMBO or equivalent to ensure the temperatures in your domicile are ok and if she could turn the heat on since you heard the weather turned colder.

Guilty of all three of those in the last week or so.

 

[stellaontap]

#475- You've saved a pot of potatoes from a boil over on more than 1 occasion while at the kitchen table reading HBT

 

[roccobrew]

After your first three batches you have read Papazian's "The Complete Joy of Homebrewing" and John Palmer's book "How to Brew" and 98% of the previous list is understood and makes perfect sense. You are bitten and smitten by the Big Ol Brew Bug and it is Great Fun!!!!

 

[beerloin]

#385 - when you purchase an extra packet of Safale-04 at the LHBS even though you are 99% sure you have one in the fridge... and when you got home, you already had 2, and 2 US-05s, 2 nottys, some cotes de blanc, and some montrachet... and considered buying one of each of those too.

+1 i feel like this happens to me every time!

 

[eelpout]

[*]When you can brew an AG batch in your sleep or while playing world of warcraft..

brewing and Warcraft were made for each other. I never wanted to leave Brewnall Villiage.
Gotta go grab a thunder ale

 

[specialkaye]

#463 swmbo totally agrees and is excited about you buying 110 lbs of grains.

#464 swmbo says we should start a brewery.

I'm still pretty nOOb but, SWMBO suggested #463 and has stated #464 several times, usually after enjoying the fruits of my labor.

#476 SWMBO says, "You should keep extra yeast just in case you need to brew anything."

 

[mlyday]

I still like 17 the best.

 

[Fuzzywumpers]

#478 You no longer run around cussing, throwing in Ice-Cubes, or trying to boil a gallon of water as fast as you can because you missed your mash temp by 1-degree.

 

[pstohs]

205) you sniff all active airlocks at least twice a day, and encourage your housemates, guests, and SWMBO to do so as well.

This sums up my day, everyday.

 

[Styles]

I haven't read the whole thread, so it's probably already in here....

479 - You leave a beer in primary for 4 months, it ends up with something growing on the top, but you bottle it, without even THINKING of dumping it until you've tasted it once it's conditioned.

 

[bpac]

417 you get more use out of your engineering degree designing your brewery than you do in 'real life'.

that's my goal!

 

[CJR]

#480 - Although you can rattle off the formula for the strength of your brew and use it in your head, you just no longer care about anything but the taste.

 

[Paymygasbill77]

#481 - When SWMBO comes home, smells the house and asks "okay, what are you fermenting now?" and not "What's that smell?".

#482 - When SWMBO not only knows all the aromas of the brewing process, but accepts them as "The smell of the house".

#483 - When SWMBO sees a clogged air lock and properly sanitizes and installs a blow-off tube while you are at work.

 

[dallasdb]

When SWMBO buys you a custom tap handle and says, "I realized this wasn't going to be a hobby you drop in a few months"

When every disagreement you have with SWMBO she says "Why don't you spend time doing (insert topic of argument here) instead of obsessing about beer all the time!"

 

[dallasdb]

Here are the pictures of the tap handle.

 

[Paymygasbill77]

Here are the pictures of the tap handle.

Now that is how it's done!

 

[jlaureanti]

can i get a hell yeah for number 84

 

[DanPoch]

I just #65 "When you look at your carboy, and see some white mouldy-stuff on top of your lager....and then think "its an aerobic organism...so I could bottle it now and kill the beasties".....and have the best beer you ever made." with an ale instead of a lager.

Kegged it, conditioned it, bottled some and friends are complaining that I don't charge them money for the beer. My favorite quotes from this beer was "You hit a home run with this beer." and "If you bottle more of that, I absolutely want some!"

 

[Dynachrome]

484. You buy a live hop plant so you can get a friendly sniff anytime you want it.

 

[davefleck]

485. You learn you can only get a sniff of that hop plant when it is flowering

 

[FifteenTen]

235. You've racked your brain...

#486 Your first thougt after reading Cheesefood's post was: "Sometimes I wish I had a secondary head..."

 

[AggieBrewer01]

#487 - The mailman and UPS guy always ask if you've been brewing lately.
#488 - People no longer ask if you're "boiling seafood again."

 

[LaurieGator]

#489: Your child's friends call you "Mead Mom".

#490: Your child's friends have already told you the date of their 21st birthday and have asked you to make them beer!

 

[diodeart]

#491: You take apart a dishwasher because there might be a chance you could use the pump, heating element, servos and control panel somehow in your brewery.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Home Brew mobile app

 

[doornumber3]

492. When your wife lets you get the dual tap kegerator so she can have something besides an iPa on tap

493. When your 5 year old daughter is mad you got a kegerator because now she can't help wash and take the labels off the bottles. Then suddenly asks if the beer is ready to come out


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew

 

[adiochiro3]

494: in response to number 77, you quit having to clean Kreusen off of everything because you've learned to use a blow off tube for every primary regardless of the original gravity.

Sent from my SGH-T889 using Home Brew mobile app

 

[abeasst]

495: People ask you to brew another batch of a beer you previously made because its so good.

 

[andy6026]

496. You no longer have rancid yeast farts.

 

[JohnSand]

497: When you're at the LHBS, and a guy asks you a question about yeast, and you have a good answer.

 

[mmb]

497: When you're at the LHBS, and a guy asks you a question about yeast, and you have a good answer.

498: When you're at the LHBS and the owner asks you a question about yeast because they know you'll have the answer.

 

[ElJefeBrews]

I'm still a noob and I'm sure this has been said already, but this brought me an odd sort of satisfaction...

499) when your girlfriend keeps yelling at you because because your brew stuff is taking up the whole kitchen table.

And just something I found funny...

- when your girlfriend tells you you have to move your carboys because the bubbling airlocks freak out the cat and he keeps attacking them

 

[zardozap]

498: When you're at the LHBS and the owner asks you a question about yeast because they know you'll have the answer.

That kinda makes the your LHBS sound kinda bad, as far as their beer knowledge goes.