Lemony gold... that was pristine until I let a single ounce too many slip into the glass. A dark, murky, tornado-like cloud is now slowly oozing downward and is fouling the perfect clarity of the beer. The bright white head looks incredibly cheap, has the texture of your average BMC light lager (worse actually), is a thin film inside of two minutes and leaves no lace. *This* is a saison?
In a blind smell test, I would have said cider with as many guesses as I was given. Not sweet apple cider, but the cider/perry that used to be reviewed on this site. LMFA is sour apple-like and smells nothing at all like beer, much less like a farmhouse ale. I'm not looking forward to tipping up the glass.
Lazy Mutt tastes like a mixture of Bud Light, Woodchuck Cider, lemon juice and a few packets of sugar. This is, by a few thousand miles, the worst saison that I've ever had and is one of the most pathetic representations of its respective style in recent memory.
I've pretty much described the flavor profile, but here are the specifics: stale grain soaked in dirty rain water, green apples, lemon juice and a small shot of Karo syrup thinned with mineral water. How could this stuff have gotten by the taste testers? Gack. The bottle cap and the label read 'Man's Best Friend'. More like 'A BA's Worst Enemy'.
As if it matters, the vital statistics are as follows: pale malt, caramel malt, Vienna malt, wheat malt, flaked barley, Galena hops, Tettnang hops, 4.82% ABV and 7 IBUs. It sure as hell doesn't taste like those ingredients came anywhere near this bottle.
The body/mouthfeel is exceptionally light, fades to frankly watery on the brief finish and has a decent amount of fine-gauged carbonation that does nothing to give volume to the beer. This Mutt just lays on the tongue, whimpers once and then slinks away with its tail between its legs.
Lazy Mutt Farmhouse Ale is 'the flagship brand of Minhas Craft Brewery'. Well boys, it looks like your ship is sinking. By the way, don't expect anyone with a single functioning taste bud to help bale. Horrendous is an understatement.