I suck at bottling

There, I've said it. My first bottling day was Sunday.

Actually, I should have filmed it as a "You don't want to do it like this" tutorial. You guys would have loved it. I must have looked like a drunk Steve Irwin trying control this thing. I still don't really know how I got beer on the ceiling, but SWMBO noticed it the moment she came home. My daughter gave me that pity laugh that sounds like "get back in the garage where you belong".

I used a racking tube, and about 4 feet of hose on that, as well as a wand on the end. I think I bit off a little too much for a new guy. Okay, granted- I was wayyy into my last batch before attempting this, but these things should come with warnings. Or at least safety goggles.

On the bright side, I am slowly realizing my needs and/or limitations, and perhaps a shorter tube minus the wand next time. I could just pinch it shut, I know. Maybe I WILL film the next one.

Anyway, I filled my 2.5 MrBeer with the 2nd half of the Sweet Stout kit from last time, and I filled my 5 gal bucket with a Draught Stout kit. Problem is, I am pretty sure I pitched too warm in the bucket, (because I didn't take any measurements for fear of contamination- too paranoid, I know - but it's the second guessing that gets me) and I see no reaction at all. The little-boy keg has been going nuts for 3 days. Temperatures after the fact on both are great, so I grabbed another Windsor yeast pack today to repitch the bucket if needed.

I will probably repitch the bucket tomorrow morning before I leave for work if I still don't see any action. I figure for $4, another pack of yeast won't hurt whether I'm too early, or if I screwed up the boil somehow anyway.

After my last bottling attempt, I may just drink this straight from the cow.

Dev110 said:

I still don't really know how I got beer on the ceiling

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Thats funny.

Not sure if you have seen this but if not give it a look.

FWIW, I would suggest not trying it without the bottling wand.

H-ost said:

FWIW, I would suggest not trying it without the bottling wand.

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I second this. I used to (attempt) to pinch it shut but trust me, you don't want to go backwards.

You can raise the bottle to above the beer line in bott?ing buc@ket to stop flow. Done this a few times

Dev110 said:

My first bottling day was Sunday

...

After my last bottling attempt, I may just drink this straight from the cow.

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It gets better fast. I hated bottling but even after semi breaking my bottler (which seems to work better without mysterious pieces of plastic that snapped off) and other misadventures, last time I bottled, all I felt was... inner peace and admiration for the shiny amber. I do mostly capped bottles and several flip tops for testing.

Yoda's "bottling tips" is good reading.

iambeer said:

Yoda's "bottling tips" is good reading.

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ROFL @ Revvy = Yoda!

That thread is great instruction, by the way. And yes, bottling does get better.

homebrewdad said:

ROFL @ Revvy = Yoda!

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The homebrewing force is strong in that one!

Shorter tube, auto siphon holder to bucket, bottling wand.
Or
Bottling bucket with spigot, 6" of tube, booting wand.

I did my first bottling like the ex shown first. went fine, just a lot of tube. I bought a bucket with a spigot a few days ago to bottle tonight with 2ND ex. That was easier. It will get easier

I feel your pain. My first batch was one comedic disaster after another, literally from the first boil-over to the spilled 3 gallons on my office floor. And yes, "first" boil-over implies that there were >1.

To be honest, I'm not a very detail oriented person. But I did take the time to write down each of the buffoonish mistakes I made, what resulted, and how I could avoid them next time. And I'm not talking a gridded EXCEL spreadsheet - I scribbled down some notes and then on a 11X5 ended up scratching a list that read like "1. decrease boil by .5 gallon and don't get so goddang drunk so early in the process." Or something like that, my writing is sort of hard to read. To my (and my wife, AND my kids) astonishment, I all but stopped making stupid mistakes. That list is beer and wort soaked 15 times over, but it gets taped to the kitchen counter at some point during every batch, including last night.

For what it's worth, the 2 gallons I didn't spill all over the floor STILL managed to taste just fine, and that might be the most important lesson of all.

Sweed is right. Auto siphons and bottling wands are two of the easiest and cheapest investments you can make. My kit didn't come with an auto siphon but its my favorite new tool. These 2 things cost under $20 together and will save you so much time and mess you'll be amazed

homebrewdad said:

ROFL @ Revvy = Yoda!

That thread is great instruction, by the way. And yes, bottling does get better.

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I'm grateful I came across that thread before I attempted bottling! The method I use came straight from Yoda and I haven't had any problems to date!

If you choose to do like tre9er said and lift the bottle high enough to stop the flow, be careful not to lift too high or it will all flow back into your bucket and you will have to start all over. I did this on my first batch while racking from carboy to bottling bucket. All the beer in the tube fell back into the carboy stirring up the sediment and I had to wait another week before I could bottle the rest. That's when I realized there's got to be a better way.
The auto siphon and wand are the right tools for the job!

Yes, the wand is really a no brainer. When I lift the bottle, I only lift just above the beer level, with a loop of tubing going much lower than that so none comes back into bucket.

When you have a wand, you don't need to lift the bottle at all. The flow will stop when you lift it off the bottom and resume when placed in another bottle. That's the no brainer part.

I guess I'm weird, I LOVE bottling, lol. And I use a bottling bucket with just a ~2" piece of hose and attach the wand to that. Works like a charm.

H-ost said:

Thats funny.

Not sure if you have seen this but if not give it a look.

FWIW, I would suggest not trying it without the bottling wand.

Click to expand...

There is no other way... I had that method configured out so well for my setup that I had to convince myself to keg... It really wasn't bad at all, and I had it done within an hour, mostly due to the vinator bottle rinser. That thing is without a doubt the most important piece of bottling equipment.

Vinator bottle rinser, never heard of it. The most important bottling equipment is a bottling bucket, bottling wand and bottles lol.

Bottling Gnomes at my house. Got set up and ready to bottle, had to hit the head before I started, and this is what I come back to. He did a damn fine job too.

That's EXACTLY the method I use—a modification of Revvy's bottling rig. Works like a charm! But I still hate bottling.

hepcat said:

I guess I'm weird, I LOVE bottling, lol. And I use a bottling bucket with just a ~2" piece of hose and attach the wand to that. Works like a charm.

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Beer on the ceiling? That's pretty crazy. I have a bad habit of leaving the spigot open on the bottling bucket when I rack the beer into it. Wife HATES sticky floors.

I remember the first few brews I made, I kept thinking...this is fun but bottling SUCKS!!

It gets easier I promise. I can bottle a batch now and not spill a drop in about an hour or less.

I have to laugh when I think of my first bottling experience. Syphon & pinch clip, bet I had 2 bottles on the floor before I was done. I now use Yoda's (Revvy's) method, and it goes smooth as silk. I don't think I ever got any on the ceiling though

It gets better not that I have great experience but I only bottle actually just finished bottling batch #20 (two more waiting) and now its fun and easy... first two batches were a disaster... I feel your pain don't worry I'm positive that it will get better

hepcat said:

I guess I'm weird, I LOVE bottling, lol. And I use a bottling bucket with just a ~2" piece of hose and attach the wand to that. Works like a charm.

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Hey.... who let you into my house!

Just kidding, your cabinets look nothing like mine, although your awesome bottling rig is exactly what mine looks like about 3 times a month (I'm on a brew schedule about every 10-11 days :rockin