Your Thoughts/Prayers/Voodoo Needed

[KIRBREW]

Your family is in my thoughts. I hope for continued progress.

 

[glenn514]

Spent some time with Marie at Hearthstone this morning. I had to do some grocery shopping...with the girls and sons-in-law around, food disappears quickly...and get some other errands done. I could not spend as much time as I wanted, but more another day. Not quite 100% done for today, but I can make the bed later. Marie continues to rest comfortably. She seems to have enjoyed a couple of CD's I played for her this morning on her new little CD player/boombox! I will definitely spend more time with her tomorrow.

The up-side is she knows who we are, and can utter a few words. The down-side is that she probably will not improve, and we have to be ready for that. Our focus is on keeping her comfortable and reminding her, over and over again, how much she is loved.

Two of our daughters and one son-in-law took me out to dinner last night to celebrate our 46th wedding anniversary. That's awfully hard to do with only half of the couple present. Guess those salty tears made the food taste better.

glenn514

 

[BrooklynTom]

My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. Stay strong.

 

[unionrdr]

Spent some time with Marie at Hearthstone this morning. I had to do some grocery shopping...with the girls and sons-in-law around, food disappears quickly...and get some other errands done. I could not spend as much time as I wanted, but more another day. Not quite 100% done for today, but I can make the bed later. Marie continues to rest comfortably. She seems to have enjoyed a couple of CD's I played for her this morning on her new little CD player/boombox! I will definitely spend more time with her tomorrow.

The up-side is she knows who we are, and can utter a few words. The down-side is that she probably will not improve, and we have to be ready for that. Our focus is on keeping her comfortable and reminding her, over and over again, how much she is loved.

Two of our daughters and one son-in-law took me out to dinner last night to celebrate our 46th wedding anniversary. That's awfully hard to do with only half of the couple present. Guess those salty tears made the food taste better.

glenn514

I honestly can't blame you if you did shed a few tears after being together with your soulmate for so long. When my dad was in this situation, there was nothing much I could do but stand there with Sharon & wat6ch him die slowly. I pray things work out better for you, my friend. Cause if things go wrong, well...that's when you're really alone. No-one to fall back on. So, at the leaste, you've got us, & especially those of us that've been there. I'll lend an ear & a thought if & when needed!

 

[glenn514]

Marie was at times very alert during my visit with her today. And she was naughty! I asked her if she knew who I was, and she shook her head "NO!" So, I asked her again, if she really did NOT know who I was...and she sorta smiled and shook her head yes!

One of the physical therapists told me that they were getting a special chair for Marie, so they can get her up and out of bed. This special chair will provide the support necessary at this time. I am finding the staff at Hearthstone Manor to be very kind, loving and supportive. Good people!

glenn514

 

[glenn514]

Visited with Marie...and #2 daughter Liesl...today. Using a lift, Marie was taken out of the bed and placed in a rather sophisticated chair. The chair actually keeps her in it and eventually will give her a view of the care center's garden. She was in this specialized chair for almost THREE hours! During her "chair time," daughter arrived, and our pastor came and prayed with all three of us.

While there are small glimpses of the "old" Marie, our daughters and I are coming to grips with the fact that she will not improve. Her other health concerns put her at high risk for additional strokes/blood clots. The staff at the skilled care facility are wonderful...but they appreciate the fact that we understand the seriousness of the situation.

I am struggling with this "new normal." I have seldom slept alone in 46 years. Now, it is normal. I have seldom eaten alone in 46 years. Now, it is normal. I have seldom gone through a day with no one else to talk to. Now, it is normal. At times, I weep because I miss my beloved wife...who is still with us. Those of you who have gone through this understand.

glenn514

 

[Temptd2]

I'm just reading this and adding my positive vibes and healing thoughts to those of the others who have been here before me.

Hoping that there is a miracle here and your dear wife can enjoy some quality of life for a good long while yet. Remember there is strength in the collective prayers and good thoughts of others - for both you AND Marie!

 

[Yooper]

I am struggling with this "new normal." I have seldom slept alone in 46 years. Now, it is normal. I have seldom eaten alone in 46 years. Now, it is normal. I have seldom gone through a day with no one else to talk to. Now, it is normal. At times, I weep because I miss my beloved wife...who is still with us. Those of you who have gone through this understand.

glenn514

Oh, Glenn I am so sorry. It's so hard to miss someone who is still here- I know exactly what you mean.

I can't give you any words that will make you feel better, except this (Isaiah 40:31): But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

You may feel alone- but you are not alone. Your new normal is not what you wanted or expected, and my heart breaks for you and Marie. I don't know why this happened to you and Marie- all I know is that this trying time will be something to get through. I will pray that you experience periods of comfort and peace as you (all) struggle through this.

 

[madscientist451]

Brother and Sister Brewers...

A week ago Friday, my dearly beloved wife of almost 46 years suffered a massive ischemic stroke in her right cerebral hemisphere. She has been hospitalized since then. This past Monday, she had another hemorrhagic stroke in her left hemisphere. Those two massive strokes plus her other medical conditions [a-fib, kidney transplant, type 2 diabetes] have led her favorite doctors to state that her condition is terminal.

I seek your thoughts, prayers, voodoo...or whatever you can do...to give me and my family the strength and compassion to make decisions on my wife's behalf.
glenn514

My thoughts and prayers are with you. You've known her for 46+ years, somewhere deep down you know what she would want you to do at this time.
I went through a similar situation with my father. The doctors said it was terminal. I didn't want to accept that, I thought he still had a chance to pull through. He never woke up from the coma and I carried around a lot of pain and anger for a while.
My thoughts are: you need to face reality and accept what the doctors are telling you. They've seen all this many times before. Sure, miracles happen and maybe one will happen for your wife and if it does be thankful and appreciative.
But you also need to accept the inevitable, we are all here for a short amount of time and no one knows when their last day will come.
So be there for your children and other family members and especially for yourself. Live your life like this could be your last day, enjoy every moment that you possibly can. Sorry, that's all I can think of for now, Peace to you brother.

 

[Cyclman]

Glenn,

You have no idea how our hearts reach out and wish we could help. I wish I could just pop open some homebrews with you and hang. Sometimes that can really help.

I have some health issues myself, and while I might live a long, normal, full life, I realize worst case my health could be very similar to Marie's.

Just know prayers for Marie, your family, and situation are going out. Being a man of faith, you know that this is a temporal world, and we all end up in a better place.

Peace, brewing brother.

 

[unionrdr]

It's tough when you have so much hope of recovery..somehow. But hope does spring eternal. Sometimes it's all we have left when facing a possibly inevitable outcome. You have to be strong for her and do whatever you can to make her quality of life the best you can provide while she's still here. We all hope & pray for her recovery, but either way we're here for you...

 

[Melana]

Glen - I had not read this before now and I am sorry that i missed it. I'm very sorry for your current situation and I will add my voice to the many offering you warm thoughts and any help I am able to provide. This forum is like an extended family and we are all here for you.
*hugs*

 

[Santo]

Our thoughts and prayers will be of your wife and family.

 

[glenn514]

Every time I come to HBT, I am overwhelmed. The support you brewers have shown me is beyond comprehension. I am blown away by your shared grief.

Today, Marie was again in her chair, and the therapist was massaging her right neck muscles/tendons which are very tight, preventing her from turning to the left [the side she cannot move]. All her vitals are good and strong. It's just a matter of two massive clots in her brain.

I keep holding my breath. While there are signs of recovery, I understand that she is at very high risk for additional strokes/clots because of a-fib and lack of coumadin [because of the hemorrhagic stroke of 18 days ago]. The antibiotics for her c-diff have stopped; another infection could totally change the game.

Certainly, I am praying for a miracle. But, I am also praying this [since I am a man of faith]: Lord of heaven and earth and all that is, show Your eternal love to Your servant, Marie. Grant her healing...either now or in eternity. Give her family the strength and faith to accept Your will.

Damn. This is hard.

glenn514

 

[Inkleg]

Glenn, please know that everyone here wishes we could be beside you in your time of need.
Just to hold your hand when you need strength, just to touch your shoulder when your head gets heavy, just to hand you a tissue when the tears come, just to bring a laugh when you think all is lost. Just know that we are here.

 

[Natdavis777]

Im sorry man... I see this a bunch at work. Dont give up.

My grandmother suffered a massive left hemisphere hemmorragic stroke in 2002. She wasnt projected much, but shes still kicking and getting around, enjoyin her grandchildren. If your wife is a fighter, and it sounds like she is, she will amaze you. Have faith brother.

 

[glenn514]

I visited Marie for a couple of hours this morning. She was reasonably alert early on...but began to fade as I stayed. Both the nurse [meds] and the physical therapist [moving limbs either with or without Marie's help] tired her out again.

I had planned to get the Gold Wing started and take a "therapy ride," but the four-year old battery would NOT hold a charge. So, off I went to Farm and Barn [Farm and Fleet for those of you NOT from Wisconsin] for a new one. I filled it with acid, but now it must sit for a time on the battery charger. There went my ride today! <sigh>

glenn514

 

[unionrdr]

Finally got back to making the video of my custom rear bumper bracket yesterday. Edited the raw footage into a video I posted on my youtube channel today. Part one anyway. I gotta fix both ends of the car & the hood before cold weather. Nothing's ever easy, is it? Some of this stuff is hard to do as I get older with bad hips & lower back. It sucks when you have so much rattling around your head, but the body says screw you. Just gotta keep pluggin' away man...:rockin:

 

[Kharnynb]

Good luck glenn, and my best wishes and hopes for a better than expected recovery.

 

[opus345]

Glenn,

In our thoughts and prayers. Praying for a miracle, but if god's plan is different, then may your wife transition to the other side with grace. Please know that many of your HBT family is thinking of you and your family at this time.

Take care!

 

[glenn514]

Before I left for church this morning [played two services at Calvary Lutheran LCMS in Elgin] the bike battery was fully charged. When I got home from church, I installed it and the bike started up like a champ. Fluffed up the tires and headed to Hearthstone to see Marie. She slept the entire time I was there!

Liesl and Jim were there as well...and they made me a platter of food from Hearthstone's resident/family/staff picnic! So, I even got lunch out of the deal.

This week, I'll be meeting with Hearthstone's staff regarding present and future treatment. I'll also be meeting with Journey Care's nurse/practitioner. Stay tuned for further updates.

glenn514

 

[glenn514]

When I arrived at Hearthstone today...100am-ish...Marie was already sitting in her chair, and was alert. I asked her if she missed me yesterday. She shook her head "Yes." I explained to her that I did not feel well, and I think she understood.

Jason, the speech therapist, stopped in and we chatted about Holy Communion. I mentioned "intinction," which is dipping the bread into the wine and administering the moistened bread as both Christ's body AND His blood. That idea he really liked! He said that she may turn away from it, but she basically turns away from most things placed in her mouth. So, any time Pastor Rubeck is willing, she can commune!

The physical therapists worked with her for a time this morning, as well. Shortly before I left...100pm-ish...they put her back in bed, and she was almost asleep when did leave.

Tomorrow afternoon, I meet with the Hearthstone staff. I have a number of questions already jotted down. Tomorrow morning, I have a dental cleaning/x-rays/exam. I'll stop back at home before I head to Hearthstone to meet with them. On Thursday afternoon, I meet with the nurse-practitioner from Journey Care.

glenn514

 

[Rhumbline]

My continued prayers for you and your family. It's possible to lose track of the emotional toll this takes on all involved.

It's good that you have your faith to support you and your loved ones during this difficult time.

 

[Shooter]

Damn. This is hard.

I have not been on much lately, just saw this thread and read through it all and was floored by the absolute and simple truth in the above statement. I am not a religious man and am, therefore, not a praying man, but you are certainly welcome to any influence my thoughts and wishes for you and your wife have on the universe. In the end, despite all the problems and my often cynical outlook, I believe in people. It gives me hope. Following your story about this difficult time, has strengthened that belief.

 

[BrooklynTom]

Prayers still being sent to all.

 

[glenn514]

I did not visit Marie this morning...had a dental cleaning/exam...but the people who care for her said she used numerous words this morning. She was semi-alert for part of my visit this afternoon.

The Journey Care person was running at least 30 minutes late, and there was NO doctor's "order" for her visit! That took care of that!

Tomorrow, I meet with the care team to look at what she can do, and what the future may hold. Brenda, one of her physical therapists, was excited about several little "steps" toward improvement.

glenn514

 

[Inkleg]

Strength for you and your family Glenn.

 

[DrunkleJon]

As long as the steps are toward improvement you can't complain. All my best though. And thank you for the updates. I am sure I speak for the rest when I say that we are right there with you although we don't necessarily know Marie ourselves. Hang in there and keep positive

 

[glenn514]

Well, at my meeting today, Hearthstone will continue to do what they are doing...giving Marie all the therapy she can tolerate in her condition. Julia, one of the physical therapists, said that while the gains may seem very small, from a therapeutic viewpoint, Marie is making good progress.

It also seems that getting Journey Care involved was premature. All three people at the meeting, in addition to me, said that at some point in the future, palliative/hospice care may be needed, but at this point in time, all her vitals are rock-solid, and therapy is assisting in her care. Right now, palliative/hospice care is not what we want. I want the staff to do what they do best...care for patients. And then, let's sit back and watch our Lord hard at work through those people, working toward improving her quality of life.

All of us know that she is at high risk for additional strokes/clots/medical problems. But I was assured today that her condition is NOT at the point of involving Journey Care at this time.

It's so very hard for me to let go, and let our Lord do His thing. But His strength is so much more than mine.

glenn514

 

[unionrdr]

Yeah, that was the hardest thing I ever had to do, speaking from past experience. But being mortal, it's natural to ponder what might've been done vs what can I do now? Nothing to do now but keep trying whatever works & let god do his part. It's hard, I know, being with someone longer than you've been single, watching them go through something like this. Years ago now, my wife was in a bad " shunt" as they call it in European racing lingo. The doctors were out of ideas, so I discussed it with them & gave them my idea. It worked, & she's still her today because of my getting "A"'s in the living sciences. So you never know how God will inspire you to help out...maybe even save the day. Just clear your mind 7 let him work his magic...