Vasectomy: Male's POV?

[k1v1116]

Im young so I might not have the perspective that comes with parenthood or age, but as far as the legality of it is concerned a vasectomy is not that different than an abortion there are laws protecting women from needing the consent or even knowledge of anyone, the father or her parents when seeking an abortion I think the same thing applies to all reproductive surgeries. But I also agree with the rest of you that any relationship where one person feels they can or have to keep something like that a secret is not a healthy relationship. So I think its only a ethical / moral question not a legal one but from my perspective it would be far worse if the wife didnt want more children and the husband did something (poking holes in condoms or whatever) to make sure she would get pregnant.

 

[DeathBrewer]

I would watch out with that whole "reversible" line of thought. It is fairly reversible in the first year or so, but I read after 5 you don't have a very good chance of it all coming together again as it were.

oh, just freeze some swimmers beforehand...then they're there if you need 'em

 

[Soulive]

If the hypothetical couple is married, I think he should be willing to reverse it. I don't see how that decision could be made singularly. Obviously its his genitalia, but I just don't think you should be married if you aren't going to discuss those things together...

 

[Rezilynt]

I agree that the marriage is seriously screwed. You can't put blame on one or the other because there is always a story behind it.
Did anyone think that maybe the guy just doesn't want to get his girlfriend pregnant?

 

[CodeRage]

oh, just freeze some swimmers beforehand...then they're there if you need 'em

Yup, got em in the yeast bank!

Ohh.... Maybe thats why I had to repitch my last batch.

 

[BrewWench]

I'm sorry, I should have specified that they are married.

 

[Rezilynt]

I'm sorry, I should have specified that they are married.

You did specify that.

 

[kornkob]

Incidentally, I wonder how this thread would have been received if it had been said liek this:

What would you say if a woman got her tubes tied after she had their most recent child? However, he wants more but she went ahead and got snipped without her husband's consent.


Or if it had been phrased:

What would you say if one parent decides to have an operation to ensure that they do not have another kid without consulting the other parent?

 

[c.n.budz]

Yup, got em in the yeast bank!

Ohh.... Maybe thats why I had to repitch my last batch.

<====== Never drinking Virtuous's beers....

 

[Donasay]

Yup, got em in the yeast bank!

Ohh.... Maybe thats why I had to repitch my last batch.

Semen + Sea People = Seasciety

 

[the_bird]

Incidentally, I wonder how this thread would have been received if it had been said liek this:

What would you say if a woman got her tubes tied after she had their most recent child? However, he wants more but she went ahead and got snipped without her husband's consent.


Or if it had been phrased:

What would you say if one parent decides to have an operation to ensure that they do not have another kid without consulting the other parent?

My reaction? Identical. I doubt it would be as seemingly unanimous, though.

 

[Buford]

I'm glad being as I don't particularly like kids and never want to have to deal with them that my wife finds the whole idea of her being pregnant and later toting around a kid to be one of the most repugnant concepts in the universe.

I almost want to have the snip done myself to cut off the chance of it ever happening, but I despise going to the doctor. Hell, I had a kidney stone and just suffered through it for half a day until it passed instead of going to a doctor.

 

[budbo]

And essentially he is saying she can't have kids because adultery is illegal.

Depends where they live and I doubt anyone outside of the Military or Utah has been charged with it for decades.

 

[Brewing Clamper]

+1 on the faulked marriage. That is way too big of a deal not to have discussed it. My wife and I have been talking about it for a long time and now that our 2nd child is 9 weeks old, I'm scheduled to go in to get snipped next month...

 

[RodfatherX]

I got to page 4 of reading this post and gave up. So if already posted sry.

Why not just never tell her. Then, when she wants to have kids, have all the baby making sex possible. Then be like sorry sweetie.....I don't know what the heck is wrong.






Ok so I wouldn't actually do that but.....just throwing it out there. Not even sure you could hide it ?

 

[kornkob]

+1 on the faulked marriage. That is way too big of a deal not to have discussed it.

You know... I do wonder if we're getting the whole story. After all the OP gave VERY few details so we have no real concept of what the real situation was.

After all, they could have talked about it and that conversation could have been perceived very differently by the man. His version might be:

We discussed getting snipped and she agreed it was probably a good idea. So I went and got it done and then when she finds out about it she goes absolutely apeshait on me.

Doesn't mean the marriage is fubar. Just means that sometimes they misunderstand one another. My grandparents often misunderstood one another but were happily married till they both died.


There's probably 3 sides to this story and we've only heard the abridged version of ONE of those sides.

 

[bethlehembrewer]

You know... I do wonder if we're getting the whole story. After all the OP gave VERY few details so we have no real concept of what the real situation was.

After all, they could have talked about it and that conversation could have been perceived very differently by the man. His version might be:

We discussed getting snipped and she agreed it was probably a good idea. So I went and got it done and then when she finds out about it she goes absolutely apeshait on me.

Doesn't mean the marriage is fubar. Just means that sometimes they misunderstand one another. My grandparents often misunderstood one another but were happily married till they both died.


There's probably 3 sides to this story and we've only heard the abridged version of ONE of those sides.

Good point. I know for a fact I have done things SWMBO has asked me to do. Come to find out she wasn't really asking but just having the convo.

 

[EdWort]

Again, I konkur with Dr. Kornkob, though he was late to the party.

 

[BrewWench]

Yeah KornKob, that's all I know too.

 

[kornkob]

Again, I konkur with Dr. Kornkob, though he was late to the party.

Sorry--- I was having a rotten day at work. There was corporate facing stuff that wasn't happening in it's usual smooth manner and, while it certainly won't reflect on me, I like the home office to think that we're all gods and everything always goes smoothly.

 

[Brewing Clamper]

After all, they could have talked about it and that conversation could have been perceived very differently by the man.

How do you misinterpret something as big as taking a knife & forceps to your balls?

 

[kornkob]

How do you misinterpret something as big as taking a knife & forceps to your balls?

You have a basic definition wrong: when a sharp object is moved in the vicinity of someone's testicles, the conversation is LONG over.

Just like with that hooker last week: The misinterpretation came long before the cuttin'.


(BTW--- where did you hide the body?)

 

[EvilTOJ]

With my SWMBO we discussed kids right at the outset of our relationship. She knows I have two and I am not interested in having more. She doesn't have any of her own, and she feels like she's too old to start having them now. So that works out for us. I think someone out and out cutting off their reproductive ability without discussing it with their significant other has serious control issues or had better have a very good reason (ie suspected infidelity) and is going to be jumping ship soon anyways.

 

[Loweface]

Here's a thought...

If a he or a she doesn't trust a contaception, he/she won't use it. If nothing else is around he/she should refuse to have sex. So if he/she wants tubes tied... No sex till done???

Oh and I don't think the marrage is fecked, though it may not be in full health...

 

[wild]

+1 on the agreement of my my choice!
After I had mine done I knew it could be reversed if I decided or if I didn't want to go under the knife again, I could always "Rent-to-Own"