Turd in the Tub

[Beerthoven]

Hypothetical situation

Suppose you have a child. Say, 2 years old and not quite potty trained. Its bath time. You fill the tub with hot, soapy water and put the child in. A few minutes later you notice a turd the size of a golf ball, maybe bigger, rolling around on the bottom of the tub. It wasn't there when you started, so obviously your kid just pooped in the bath!

What do you do?

 

[The Pol]

Post it on Homebrewtalk and let the child marinate until you get a response?

 

[Mutine Bullfrog]

you need one more option.

Remove the turd, child and water. Demolish the tub and replace it with a new one.

 

[ShortSnoutBrewing]

How many Courics was it??

 

[Nurmey]

The heck with the poll, what did the hypothetical dad do?

 

[Evan!]

I chose "C", because, well, that's awesome. I can't wait till we have kids so I can do that to the wife.

 

[ShortSnoutBrewing]

The heck with the poll, what did the hypothetical dad do?

That's why he's got the poll...turd and child are still in the tub!

 

[Sir Sudster]

Post it on Homebrewtalk and let the child marinate until you get a response?

This is the funniest thing I have heard today! ROFLMAO!

 

[c.n.budz]

definitely C, it's the easiest AND funniest option

 

[Denny's Evil Concoctions]

Uhm.. How about Throw Child and Turd out with the bath water and become a happy childless couple.

That isn't the same tub you use for cleaning your beer botltes is it?

 

[Hopleaf]

Is it my turd or the child's turd?

 

[BierMuncher]

Depends:

If it's a good sized, solid floater, fabricate a mini-sail out of a toothpick and some paper and play naval warfare.

If it's a sinker, have the 2-yr-old stand up and play..."stomp the turd".

 

[LostDakota]

D. Ask the_Bird

 

[EdWort]

Floating Baby Ruth anyone?

 

[Soulive]

Floating Baby Ruth anyone?

I love that movie, with a passion!!

 

[jds]

This has happened to me as well.

Remember, sanitizer works on non beer-related stuff too!

I'm not sure SWMBO knows about it. She'd go for option F, "Burn the house down and rebuild with the insurance money"....

 

[Denny's Evil Concoctions]

Dump half a bucket of oxyclean in there. Might want to remove said kid first though.

 

[Greggy]

You removed the kid right?

Greg

 

[olllllo]

Make Jenkem.

 

[Denny's Evil Concoctions]

You removed the kid right?

Greg

No, he doesn't want to get any germs on his hands.

 

[CodeRage]

Bah.... Its been floating in soapy water, its clean

 

[Brew Runner]

Well, think about it this way: turds come out of butts and a butt was in the bath to begin with. They both share the same bacteria if you're worried about that kind of thing. Fish it out and continue.

Don't believe what the Clorox, Lysol, and disinfectant commercials preach; humans didn't make it this far and do this well because they disinfected everything.

 

[Yuri_Rage]

I voted C, but I have a twist on it:

Remove child. Leave turd. Activate tub drain. Move bath to the guest bathroom. Stop by the kitchen sink to use the sprayer as a poopy pressure washer. Act dumb (not difficult) when SWMBO finds the surprise.

 

[mrkristofo]

I thought you said Turd in the Trub, and I was anxiously anticipating reading just how that happened.

 

[quickerNu]

Ahh, had this situation "pop up" with my twins. I just thought is was a meatball from dinner and took it out barehanded. oops.

 

[JalaPeno]

lol...............Aggies

 

[RICLARK]

I chose "C" because I have and will continue to do it until my boy is potty trained.

 

[bluedragoon85]

I can't decide on this one. I think it really depends on what mood I am in. If I just want to get it all over with and have other things on my mind, I will probably go ahead with "A" and go on with my life. However, if I'm in a good mood and feeling like surprising my SWMBO with a gift from beyond, I will probably go with "B". Either way, very disgusting; it reminds me of that time I was in a public pool and this turd came floating my way. I immediately got out and stayed out.

However, I wont have to deal with this issue any time soon; no child, no wife.

 

[beala]

Dude what's a baby doing in your turd water? Remove baby, continue bathing turd.

 

[EvilTOJ]

So what would you do, hypothetically, if said two year old pooped in the tub, then said "look daddy!" as she picked it up and showed it to you?

I mean, not that I ever ran into that situation, or anything. Oh no. Never.

 

[cronxitawney]

I thought you said Turd in the Trub, and I was anxiously anticipating reading just how that happened.

You're not the only one. At first glance, that is what thought as well. He steeped his child in poop tea

 

[MULE]

I voted B... and here is why....

My daughter is a year old. We're home alone and it's bath time. She loves bath time. She playing, splashing and yelling out babyisms. All is well..... and then it happened. She suddenly became quite. The look on her face was like she was staring at a ghost. She held her breath and her pale face turned red. It sounded like a 45 went off in the bathroom as something the size of sausage link fired from her person and then skipped across the water (yep, like a rock on the lake) hitting the front of the tub.

Let's face it, I am a guy. I laughed out loud. But when she quickly became interested in what she had created, I thought it was best to remove it from the tub. Bath time over......

I don't even want to imagine what she would have done with it if she got her hands on it.

 

[Bedlam]

Well, whenever there is some baby care question I can't answer, I just refer to these easy diagrams:

http://www.makememinimal.com/2008/instrucciones-para-cuidar-un-bebe/

Enjoy.

 

[kornkob]

 

[drunkatuw]

My brother called my mom last week and said that her grandson was a monkey. My mom asked why and my brother said he was giving his son (2 yrs old) a bath and talking to his wife when his son let one go in the tub, picked it up and threw it at his mom. I couldn't stop laughing after I heard that story.

 

[MULE]

My brother called my mom last week and said that her grandson was a monkey. My mom asked why and my brother said he was giving his son (2 yrs old) a bath and talking to his wife when his son let one go in the tub, picked it up and threw it at his mom. I couldn't stop laughing after I heard that story.

Classic poo throwing LOL !

 

[Beerthoven]

LOL. Many hilarious responses; definately the best part of my morning so far.

FWIW, I chose option B: scoop the poop and continue with the bath. The turd was nice and compact, like a meatball, and didn't leave any floaties so it was an easy decision.

This same child had a leaky diaper during the night and woke up soaked from neck to ankle in pee. SWMBO got to deal with that one...I was too busy eating froot loops.

 

[the_bird]

You know, it's your own damn fault for washing the baby in the freakin' toilet bowl. Don't you know that only works until they're six months old?