The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

[paulthenurse]

Not for nuttin' but I'm also nice to little old ladies, have a better than average curve ball, and can negotiate a wine list with aplomb. I will admit, for the sale of complete honesty, that I don't floss. No one's perfect.

 

[Cape Brewing]

any pinch flats recently?

 

[Cape Brewing]

hey... you around this weekend?

I am gonna run Bertha over so let me know when you might be out.... and I'll swing by then.

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

Paul, I understand not adding the extra dextrose but do you dump out the Oxyclean before you fill the carboy or do you add more just before racking to create some Epic Dry Hopping-Oxyclean effect?

 

[paulthenurse]

Now ya see, that was a perfect example of why the Mods don't shut this total waste of bandwidth of a thread down. It was mean, it was cutting, it was dry, it was sarcastic, and it was funny. It had Masshole written all over it. I applaud you.

In answer to the sarcasm disguised as a question, I realized long ago, probably after the first time I had one of 'you know who's beers, that Oxyclean adds Full Strength Ass Flavor to beverages. I also realized that I didn't like it, so unlike 'you know who' I skip that step. Kind of like Irish moss. Just don't bother. Some people apparently like it, but me? Not so much.

 

[Cape Brewing]

I get it. Funny stuff.

 

[paulthenurse]

Stage Directions
Act Two, Scene 2​

A three second pause, then PTN turns his head to the audience and whispers 'sotto vocce', "I guess SOMEONES got Oxyclean in his vag," then turns back to Cape and pretends to be interested in what he's whining about.

 

[paulthenurse]

Hey Oxy,
Don't worry about bringing Bertha over, I've got to bring her out to Princeton. I'll swing by and pick her up on Monday.

 

[DakotaRules]

Then you guys can have a few drinks together and shoot the $hit.

"Brothers don't shake hands, brothers hug"

 

[Cape Brewing]

By the way... it was Star San... for the 14th time.

 

[DakotaRules]

By the way... it was Star San... for the 14th time.

We know, We know.... It was StarSan.....

 

[paulthenurse]

But Oxy is a much better name than Star San.

 

[Cape Brewing]

and there are much better names for you but we still call you Paul..


... to your face

 

[DakotaRules]

Hey this thread doesn't have spam! Yet... When PTN and Cape get after it they sling so much crap that the mods don't know what to decipher.

Cape how do you feel about baseball? PTN what is your rebuttal.

Commence the bickering!

 

[Cape Brewing]

baseball blows.

Debating what I wanna brew this week. Doing at least two batches... Brack Rager and then I'm not sure what.

I gots Thursday off.

I might do an IPA but I've got a Belgian IPA that's about to be ready in a couple of days. Hmmmm...

it's a mystery.

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

Clone Wachusetts Larry IIPA. Been looking for a recipe for a while and been too lazy trying to figure it out myself.

 

[Cape Brewing]

nah

 

[paulthenurse]

Get yourself some apple juice and drop some Notty in. It's good to just wear tee shirts and jeans from time to time.

 

[paulthenurse]

And BTW, baseball don't suck, people who think baseball sucks do. The Red Sox suck. At least everyone on the current team with the exception of Petey and Elsbury does.

 

[bluemoose]

Bud Light clone?

 

[paulthenurse]

Yeager's Blue Balls Ale?

 

[bluemoose]

40%+ ABV beer... "Barley Brandy"?

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

How about something without hydrogen peroxide in it?

 

[motobrewer]

40%+ ABV beer... "Barley Brandy"?

ppffffffffffbaaaaahahaahhahahhahhahhhhaahahhahahhahah!

 

[paulthenurse]

40%+ ABV beer... "Barley Brandy"?

Just snorted iced coffee out my nose.

 

[Cape Brewing]

yeah that is funny... Oh Paul... by the way... how's the U comin' along?

Oddly enough we haven't seen an update on that beer in a while.

 

[Cape Brewing]

Yeah that "Barley Brandy" is completely stalled out... NOTHING will touch it. i'm bummed out. I really thought I would be able to ferment it out a lot more than it did. It crapped out at about 17.5% ABV and will not budge with anything.

I've tried energizer, nutrients, O2... tons of fresh yeast... and even a huge slug of the turbo distillers yeast... nothin'. It just does not want to budge.

which sucks because that beer tastes like it would be amazing.

 

[Cape Brewing]

Went Brack Rager and just a regular IPA. i go through IPA in my house like it is water so, I'm thinking I can't have too much on tap.

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

So what did you end up doing with it? Any attempt at distilling?

 

[Cape Brewing]

It is just sitting in the fermenter waiting for me to think of something to do with it. I am debating whether or not I want to freeze concentrate it just for the eff of it to see what it would taste like.