The "Dear" , "Sincerely" thread

[Psylocide]

Dear Guys,

We're not hoarders, we're collectors.

Sincerely,

Expert-level collector

 

[marckw]

Dear expert-level collector:

I am truly amazed at your persistence and dedication, and feel confident that someday you will realize I'm still here.

Stay golden Pony Boy...

Sincerely,

The Outsiders VHS tape you rented in '85

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Dear DrunkleJon:
Thank you so much for the box of awesome brews, I owe you.
Sincerly, gratus fermentatio.

 

[DrunkleJon]

Dear DrunkleJon:
Thank you so much for the box of awesome brews, I owe you.
Sincerly, gratus fermentatio.

Dear gratus fermentatio,
Enjoy them, thats all the payment I need. And post pictures to make everybody else jealous.
Sincerely,
DrunkleJon

Edit: I see you already did.

 

[Newsman]

Dear fellow photographers:
Please stop undermining me with models. If I wanted to pay them, I would have ASKED what they charged.

Sincerely,
P!ssed Off Photographer

 

[TXCrash]

Dear fellow photographers:
Please stop undermining me with models. If I wanted to pay them, I would have ASKED what they charged.

Sincerely,
P!ssed Off Photographer

Dear photographer,

Thanks for helping them launch their careers.

Sincerely,

Yeah, I went there.

 

[Newsman]

Dear photographer,

Thanks for helping them launch their careers.

Sincerely,

Yeah, I went there.

LOL! No casting couch for me. I'm not famous enough to get away with that.

 

[biochemedic]

Dear Yeah I Went There,

LOL! No casting couch for me.

Sincerely,
I'm not famous enough to get away with that.

Dear Newsman,

Please phrase your reply in the form of: "Dear X, Message. Sincerly, Y.
Thank you.

Sincerly,
Fixed That For You.

 

[Onkel_Udo]

Dear Puppy Mill Breeder,

FU for pumping 11 litters out of my current rescue Saint Bernard. She never met a dog that was not was not humping her or her puppy and as a result does not understand basic pack behavior. She is sweet and loving and wants to play with other dogs but she does not know how. 7 years old and never played with another dog...FU.

Sincerely,

Guy that would put a 10mm slug in your head and not flinch...but would never treat an animal this way.

 

[Beernik]

Dear God,

I love this conference. But please never again present me with so much free food and drink that my stomach hits refusal.

I feel like a freshman who lost a competitive eating contest on dollar beer night.

Sincerely,

Where is the aspirin & antacid?

 

[slym2none]

Dear body,

I know you are a night owl. I realise that you prefer to stay up late. But, I have to get up at 8:30 AM and I really need you to turn off the brain for a while.

Sincerely, Late-Night Lover

 

[TXCrash]

Dear 8:30,

Count yourself lucky,

4:55

 

[Renegades_Brew]

Dear 8:30,

Count yourself lucky,

4:55

Dear 4:55

I wish I could get up at 4:55...

Sincerely,
4:30 even on weekends...

 

[SatanPrinceOfDarkness]

Dear Stovetop,

Why is part of you made of plastic?

Sincerely,

The renter who melted you just now

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear 4:30

There's a 4:30 in the MORNING too?????

Sincerely,
Who am I kidding, I've gotten up at 4am to drink beer and catch late morning local time footy.

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Dear 4:30,
By the time you're getting up, I've been going for six hours.
Sincerely, My day starts at 22:30 (10:30pm).

 

[TXCrash]

Dear neighbor that was working on his trailer till nearly 10,
**** you dude, I wish you'd gotten soaked by the massive rain.

Great way to introduce yourself. The guy that lived there before was a disrespectful dooshebal too.

Sincerely,

Sleep? Who needs it?

 

[max384]

Dear past self,

F*ck you.

Sincerely,

Present self









Dear future self,

Sorry in advance.

Sincerely,

Present self

 

[Billy-Klubb]

Dear 4:30 Sissies,
@gratus fermentatio has us all beat by being an oddball. otherwise, @mcbaumannerb and I have you beat. 2:30 in the AM, batches!

Sincerely,
Tired a lot

 

[TXCrash]

Dearest thread,
Por que esta tu muerta?
Sincerest,
Bored and poopomg. That's pooping.

 

[max384]

Dear Fort Pickett, VA

You can keep your hot weather. I miss PA.

Sincerely,

Hot, sweaty, and tired

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Dear hot and sweaty,

It's only going to get worse

Sincerely,
Fellow relocated Pennsylvanian.

 

[max384]

Dear fellow relocation Pennsylvanian

Thank god I'm only here for two weeks!!!

Sincerely,

I'm too tired to unstick my balls from my leg any longer

 

[SnakeRidge]

Dear Stickyballs,

Gold bond powder.

Sincerely,

Don't Come Into SC Without A Soothing Anti Chafe Powder.

 

[biochemedic]

Dear everyone,

It was F'ing hot in Pgh today too...although probably worse south of the Mason Dixon...

Sincerely,
PA still gets hot and miserable too.

P.S. Summer humidity notwithstanding, I still miss NC alot...

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Dear PA still gets hot,

Let's talk about humidity

Signed,
They call Columbia "Famously Hot" for a reason




Dear Cheesy,

No one cares.

Sincerely,
The rational part of Cheesy's brain.

 

[biochemedic]

Dear Giant Eagle Market District,

Thanks for having both child care *and* a bar. Having a black DIPA makes shopping on Saturday almost tolerable, and the boy loves getting a chance to play Minecraft on an XBox...

Sincerely,
Wife and daughter are at a birthday party and guess who got stuck doing groceries?

 

[72hw]

Dear Netflix,

Please refrain from making more of these twelve hour long movies like Sense8 and pass along the word to AMC, HBO and all the rest. I need to brew. I also need sleep.

Sincerely,

Mr. No Willpower Fanboi

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Dear weather gods, We could use some rain; a nice, gentle, soaking rain; for a couple hours. No big winds, no lightning, we need rain, not fire.
Sincerely, all of western Montana.

 

[Stealthcruiser]

Dear Sticky Balls,

It's called "Treefroggin"

Sincerely,

Thought you should know.