The "Dear" , "Sincerely" thread

[jbaysurfer]

Dear Sick Guy,

We know you're home watching internet porn and eating pizza while you wait for you hangover to subside.

Sincerely,
Work

 

[number40fan]

Dear, Royals.

Don't let us down.

Sincerely,
He who hates everything in California.

 

[jbaysurfer]

Dear He Who Hates everything in California,

You are missing out on some of the best beer in the world, and you are also missing out that everyone here who is an A's Angels, Dodgers, or Padres fan is rooting for your boys.

Sincerely,
No Pliny For You.

 

[Komocabo]

Dear Giants,

Get it done. I don't want to watch another game.

Sincerely,
Streaming the game on my work PC...

 

[ubnserved]

Dear someone who plays baseball,
Win already the game is soooo boring and needs to be removed from my tv. Not that will help much with the boredom because even dumber things like fake singing shows and the all important "I'm a **** so marry me" shows will be on. TV just sucks anymore.

Sincerely,
Grouchy not so old f#!\ who would rather retire at 55 than pay for cable who is stuck at home till his broke a$$ can walk more than 5 minutes.

Maybe I should relax and have a home brew.... #/% <| can't do that either cause I'm out! just not my year.

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear baseball season,

Please be over now. And take American football (pro and college) with you. You're getting in the way of my hockey and my football (the kind actually played with feet). And otherwise, you're getting in the way of everything else on TV.

Sincerely,
Me.


Dear Network TV Executive People,

Why come you have to always air every f***ing American football game, and every f***ing baseball game on network TV at night, but you won't play every game of the Stanley Cup FINALS on network TV let alone the rest of the playoffs, let alone the regular season. Let alone EVER playing football outside of Saturdays. I mean, yeah, you gave me more Premier League coverage on the weekends, but DC United is never on TV without cable. And I don't want to pay for cable. And I can't get a decent stream half the time. And even then, still usually have to watch Spurs via stream because you never air them. And almost always have to watch Caps on stream.

Sincerely,
Really doesn't want to pay for cable, and even then couldn't get my wife to go along.



Dear ******s Who Make Both of the Above the Case...

I know where you live and I know where you sleep. You know who you are.

Sincerely,
Me


Dear Giants,

HA HA

Sincerely,
I don't care who wins but I just wanted to mock someone.

 

[cannman]

Dear World Series,
Why are you soooo dull??? This is SO dull that I just might start watching soccer... in SPANISH!

Sincerely,
My NHL Center Ice Free Preview is over

 

[Komocabo]

Dear Balls,

Thank you for always being a blast. But who decided on having them outside of the body? You know what Billy_Klub does to them, right?

Sincerely,

Who made that sh!t up/

 

[b-boy]

Dear Really doesn't want to pay for cable, and even then couldn't get my wife to go along,

If Hockey and 'Soccer' could make enough money for the networks they'd be on TV (The networks are greedy bastards after all). Unfortunately, they are niche sports to most of the country. Sorry, that's just the way it is.

Sincerely - 'Merica

 

[Newsman]

Dear Really doesn't want to pay for cable, and even then couldn't get my wife to go along,

If Hockey and 'Soccer' could make enough money for the networks they'd be on TV (The networks are greedy bastards after all). Unfortunately, they are niche sports to most of the country. Sorry, that's just the way it is.

Sincerely - 'Merica

Dear 'Merica,
As far as I'm concered, ALL professional sports could leave TV and I'd never miss 'em.
Sincerely,
Anti-pro sports

 

[b-boy]

Dear Anti-pro sports,
Even NASCAR!?!
Sincerely, 'Merica

 

[Beernik]

Dear Work,

You insisted I come in today and nobody who wanted to meet with me is here. So I'm going to spend the next 8 hours spreading this virus throughout the building. Good luck maintaining productivity for the next two months.

Sincerely,

Sick Guy.

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Dear Anti-Pro sports,

Why not just shorten your name to sports?

Sincerely,
Anti+Pro=0

 

[Newsman]

Dear Anti-pro sports,
Even NASCAR!?!
Sincerely, 'Merica

Dear 'Merica,
Especially NASCAR!

Sincerely,
'Sports

 

[Black Island Brewer]

Dear 'Sports, 'Merica, and the others who hash out their rivalries here,

There are whole threads just for you to duke it out, most of them have "obnoxious" in the title. Find them and enjoy!

Sincerely,
Let's get back to our non-sports buffoonery

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear Lets Get Back,

Sincerely,
Billy Mays

 

[Natdavis777]

Dear Billy Mays,

I won...

Sincerely,

Cocaine


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew

 

[cannman]

Dear Billy Mays,

Sincerely,
Billy Mays

 

[number40fan]

Dear, No Pliny For You.

I would invite you to Colorado, but we already have enough emigrants.

Sincerely,
I am on the wrong side of the divide to flush you some consumed beer.

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear Cocaine,

I won.

Sincerely,
David Bowie

 

[TXCrash]

Dear coffee,
I missed you today, I'll not skip you tomorrow.

Sincerely,
**** my dentist and his whitening trays. Coffee is better than white teeth anyways.

 

[max384]

Dear ******* ahead of me who refused to make a right on red at an empty intersection today,

Even though you only costed me 30 seconds of extra waiting, I hope your car breaks down and you have to walk home in the cold rain.

Sincerely,
The frustrated line of cars behind you

 

[jbaysurfer]

Dear Wrong Side of the Divide:

Thanks for the great party and contest you threw out there earlier this month.

Condolences for the fact that this side of the divide owned the hoppy beer categories in your big contest.

Sincerely,
The Hoppy Side of the Divide

 

[jbaysurfer]

Dear The frustrated line of cars behind me:

I was waiting for a pedestrian to clear the sidewalk.

Sincerely,
Sorry for your 30 second loss

 

[Billy-Klubb]

Dear Coworker,

I get it. You think you're Capt. Badass. I know you're not, but whatever gets you through the day.

Sincerely,
STFU Already

 

[max384]

Dear Sorry for your 30 second loss,

Your meds are wearing off. There were no pedestrians anywhere nearby.

Sincerely,
It's about the principle of the matter, not the actual time lost

 

[jbaysurfer]

Dear Principle of the matter,

You're probably right. I think I was having flashbacks to being in your car and being impatient and honking at the car in front of me all out of sorts when I saw the beautiful young lady who looked like my daughter step onto the curb out of the crosswalk.

Sincerely,
The one of us who acted irrationally.

 

[soccerdad]

Dear Billy Mays,

My $hit will flock you up.

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dh_2r06Ahs0[/ame]

Sincerely, JaboOody

 

[DrunkleJon]

Dear that guy,

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear JaboOody,



Sincerely,
Watch this, you're gonna love my nuts.