The "Dear" , "Sincerely" thread

[Kent88]

Snow blowing?
Boat rowing?
Luggage stowing?

 

[seatazzz]

Snow blowing?
Boat rowing?
Luggage stowing?

Goat towing. Oops wrong thread.

Nope, he's going to be a machine roll form operator. Hope nobody is afraid of flying.

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Snow blowing?
Boat rowing?
Luggage stowing?

Undertowing
Hop growing
All knowing
Kick to the groin(ing)

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Goat towing. Oops wrong thread.

Nope, he's going to be a machine roll form operator. Hope nobody is afraid of flying.

If we weren't, should we start to be?

Flying is never the fear, it is the thought of a sudden jarring halt you come to after falling out of the sky that scares some.

 

[Jayjay1976]

Dear @Kent88 ,

I'll have what you're drinking.

Sincerely, Fidel Castmoth would be a good name for an indie/garage/rock band.

Dear "I'll have what you're drinking",

For a few glorious months in college I was in a screamo band, we called ourselves Herb Quackenbush. Herb wasn't a real person of course, more of a persona so to speak.... apparently of the non-grata persuasion.

Sincerely,
We never did manage to book a paying gig.

 

[bracconiere]

Dear @Kent88
I didn't grow up on a farm but I get a serious case of the willies recalling the first time I saw a currywurst machine in action. *shudder*

View attachment 785077
Caption for the hearing impaired:
"Hummmmmm FWAP FWAP FWAP FWAP FWAP Hummmmmm...."

Sincerely,
FWAP FWAP FWAP FWAP FWAP

dear jay,
they are kosher!

sincerly,
i think you should know about khosering!

 

[El Whedo]

Dear, "We never did manage to book a paying gig."

I understand. While not a regular member, my friends in the Jazz Fascists used to encourage me to wear a loincloth and beat on a hubcap with a wooden spoon in the "role" of Smashy on stage.

Sincerely, never again to be encouraged.

 

[Jayjay1976]

Dear, "We never did manage to book a paying gig."

I understand. While not a regular member, my friends in the Jazz Fascists used to encourage me to wear a loincloth and beat on a hubcap with a wooden spoon in the "role" of Smashy on stage.

Sincerely, never again to be encouraged.

Dear "never again to be encouraged",

I was a percussionist too! Mostly stomping a wooden box but I played the koto sometimes when the mood struck.

Always wanted to try playing the fire buckets, but Eugene Hutz had cornered the market.

Sincerely,
The Golden Glockenspiel

 

[seatazzz]

Dear my very dear sick senior dog,

I am so happy the meds that we are giving you are suppressing your cough, and curing the upper respiratory infection that you picked up. However I wish they would stop giving you the most horrendous gas I've ever smelled from a dog. But I will admit I'd one hundred times rather smell that gas than have to lead you over that final bridge, it's too soon.

Sincerely, there is a noxious green cloud hovering around her butt, I swear. #Amoxicillin=horrible canine flatulence

 

[Kent88]

Bark bark,

Arf arf arf. Woof woof. Bark bark bark bark bark. Bow wow.

Howl,
Bark

 

[balrog]

Dear my very dear sick senior dog,

I am so happy the meds that we are giving you are suppressing your cough, and curing the upper respiratory infection that you picked up. However I wish they would stop giving you the most horrendous gas I've ever smelled from a dog. But I will admit I'd one hundred times rather smell that gas than have to lead you over that final bridge, it's too soon.

Sincerely, there is a noxious green cloud hovering around her butt, I swear. #Amoxicillin=horrible canine flatulence

Dear Registry of Great Names For A Rock Band,

I do hereby submit "Canine Flatulence".

Sincerely
Easily Amused

 

[bruce_the_loon]

Dear Registry of Great Names For A Rock Band,

I do hereby submit "Canine Flatulence".

Sincerely
Easily Amused

Dear Easily Amused

Thank you for your kind submission. It is our pleasure to announce that you are the 250th person to submit "Canine Flatulence" and the proposed name has now crossed the threshold to be assigned to the next unoriginal, bass-thumping, poorly syncopated grunge band to emerge from the darkened recesses of the Seattle Starbucks scene.

Yours in melodious gratitude,
Tiber Flumen Pollutum (Honorary Chaircat of the Registry of Great Names For A Rock Band)

 

[grampamark]

Dear Honorary Chaircat:

It may interest you to learn that, here in Big Sky Country, there is a Tiber Flumen which, fortunately, has yet to be subjected to significant pollutum.

Sincerely,
grampamark

 

[seatazzz]

Dear Hot Hands Hand Warmers in my Slippers,

You are the SHIZNIT. Activated you at 6am and right now at 5:30pm my feet are still toasty warm after being in a chilly garage all day.

Sincerely, sometimes the cheap things REALLY work

 

[bracconiere]

Dear people In Cold Climates,

here in AZ it was like 70f outside today on 12-9-22....

Sincerely,

guy glad i don't need that silly electric blanket anymore!

 

[Kent88]

Dear people In Cold Climates,

here in AZ it was like 70f outside today on 12-9-22....

Sincerely,

guy glad i don't need that silly electric blanket anymore!

We don't all have the marshals ready to move us to some warm, inconspicuous place.

 

[bracconiere]

inconspicuous place.

i assure you they're hiding me in plain sight!

 

[Kent88]

 

[bracconiere]

but do it in the dear sincerely context!

 

[Kent88]

Dear Thread Regulars,

Sorry, I forgot to put a few posts in the typical format. I think we all know that in this situation we should all blame Bracc.

Sincerely,
Kent88

P.S. #BlameBracc

 

[bracconiere]

Dear Kent,

go ahead give me your hate!

Sincerely,

every rap song that says how you like me now! drinking some homebrew not feeling like i'm lit on fire!

 

[Kent88]

How I imagine Canada started:

Dear everyone who just can't handle temperatures below 40°F,

No, it's ok, we'll take the cold place up north here. You weren't going to use it anyway.

Sincerely,
Canadians

 

[Kent88]

Dear Canadians,

The above was a blatant ripoff from a video made by some of your finest internet sketch comedians.



Sorry, I just really loved the joke and I'm terrible at coming up with my own material.

Sincerely,

 

[seatazzz]

Dear brand new 3-roller grain mill,

Thank you for not shredding yourself into many pieces yesterday when a nut vibrated off the hopper and stopped you in a dramatic fashion.

Sincerely, just brewed what should be a fairly good batch of the house Citra/Sabro IPA

 

[bracconiere]

a nut vibrated off the hopper and stopped you in a dramatic fashion.

i'm trying to make a joke, but were you holding a drill when that happened?

 

[seatazzz]

i'm trying to make a joke, but were you holding a drill when that happened?

Yes...yes I was. Haven't gotten around to building the new stand yet. My own stupid fault for not using the bit driver to make sure all of the nuts were tight. Yes, many jokes can be had from this post, I am aware.

 

[bracconiere]

make sure all of the nuts were tight. Yes, many jokes can be had from this post, I am aware.

Dear seatazz,

i was actually concerened you didn't break your wrist!

Sincereley,

Bracc

 

[seatazzz]

Dear seatazz,

i was actually concerened you didn't break your wrist!

Sincereley,

Bracc

Dear Bracc,

Yep I let go of it in time, didn't even break a nail. Fast reactions for an old gal.

Sincerely,

55 years old and only broken bone has been my toe in 8th grade. *KNOCK WOOD*

 

[bracconiere]

Dear seatazz,

About the same here, just a boken knuckle when i was like 10. damn thing smarted for months! never even found out it was bust until it was almost totally healed....

Sincereley,

Someone who learned not to punch kids in the forehead the hard way!

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Dear Santa,
I am glad that you have received all the requests from my small troop of young children, but do you have to charge my Amazon account.
What happened to the Elves, and how did this work before Amazon and the internet?
Sincerely,
Bah hum-bug.