Stupid Joke Thread!

[balrog]

Name one reason why you don't like making plans for the day.


Because then the word premeditated gets thrown around in the courtroom.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

How do you stop a bull from charging?

Take away his credit cards.

 

[balrog]

 

[day_trippr]

To all the people that always said I'd never amount to anything because of my procrastination: Just you wait!

 

[balrog]

Once I got addicted to Tetris.

Once I got it under control, everything fell into place.

 

[balrog]

 

[balrog]

 

[BeerAndTele]

Yesterday I went to McDonalds and ate a kid’s Happy Meal.
His mom was really p*ssed.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

What do you call a moose with no name?

Anonymous.

 

[agentbud]

I got so drunk last night. I walked across the dance floor on the way to the bar for another drink and won the dance contest.

 

[balrog]

 

[balrog]

What do you call it when one banana eats another banana?

Canabananabalism.

 

[Broothru]

What do you call it when one banana eats another banana?

Canabananabalism.

Try sayin’ that three times quickly.

(“That, that, that…”)

 

[homebeerbrewer]

 

[homebeerbrewer]

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Philippe Flop.

 

[balrog]

 

[Jonakr]

View attachment 862382

Yeah, I don't understand this at all. Can anyone tell me why this is funny and makes sense?

 

[balrog]

Yeah, I don't understand this at all. Can anyone tell me why this is funny and makes sense?

“Is it for a clock?”

“Is it 4 o’clock?”

Sounds the same.

 

[Sailingeric]

Yeah, I don't understand this at all. Can anyone tell me why this is funny and makes sense?

I was in the same boat

 

[BongoYodeler]

I was in the same boat

Same.

 

[DBerg]

No one wears a watch anymore

 

[day_trippr]

 

[homebeerbrewer]

 

[Jonakr]

“Is it for a clock?”

“Is it 4 o’clock?”

Sounds the same.

Thanks! I didn't catch that at all.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

I don’t get why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more. He’s basically one big Banner

 

[balrog]

I don’t get why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more. He’s basically one big Banner

 

[agentbud]

One minute you're young and fun. The next, you're turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

 

[balrog]

I think people stop liking math in school when they feel it's no longer applicable to everyday life. Addition and subtraction? Fine. Used all the time. Like say there's 13 of you & your friends and you have a 12 pack of beer. That means that 12 of you


need to leave.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

What did the mother turkey say to her naughty son?





If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?





Drumsticks for everyone on thanksgiving.