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Pet Peeves that drive me insane - whats yours?

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Another pet pEEve

I don't like when my son pees on me during a diaper change. :D

Even worse, he's pooped once before during the clean-up process. He ruined a perfectly clean diaper!!
 
"Can I ask you a question?" - I think that this one bothers me on more of a daily basis than anything. 'Can I ask you a question?' Well guess what? You just did! And guess what else? I dont want to answer any more questions now!
Just get to the point and ask what you want to ask. Dont feel me out before you make the daring move to inquire about something from me. Just pull the trigger and ASK damn it! Whats the worst that I am going to say?
No? Hell No? I dont know?

Ohhhhhhhh..... I get this one at work all the time. IM comes in, "You have a minute for a question?" Well, you know what, I just did but now I'm all out of minutes because I just took the time to answer this. How do you feel about that, nutsack? Next time, just ask me the damn question and I'll answer it when I get a free second.

The cousin of this is, "Can I call you?" Well, that depends... can you dial the phone or do you suffer from some horrible finger disfigurement rendering you unable to dial all but those cell-phones Ed McMahon peddles to old people with buttons the size of a deck of cards?
 
Guys at work that dont wash their hands after pissing or sh*tting, but go to their desk and rub antibacterial goop on their hands. Like they care about germs, but dont give a f*ck about their d*ck juice on the door that we have to feel.

Well, I wash my hands after going to the bathroom as it is socially the correct thing to do, but since I don't piss all over my hands I'd like to point out the following:

1) When I wake up in the morning I take a shower.
2) In the shower I wash my junk.
3) I then put on clean underwear
4) I put clean pants over my clean underwear over my clean junk.
5) I then go out in the world shaking hands with dirty people and touching doors, desks, windows, whatever... with whatever germs people have.
6) When it comes time to take a leak, I reach in with my now dirty hand and pull out my previously clean junk.

With that logic, I'd be better off washing my pecker in the sink rather than my hands after taking a leak.
 
Whiggers: white people who act like they are black.
Wheaners: white people who act like they are latino.

Much like the hat on backwards, sideways or just cockeyed. White people listening to hip hop and/or rap believing that they are "down with that". Get a clue cracker.

Be who you are, not who you ain't.

And Cisco, don't dwell too much on that whole "who's johnson have I been touching" issue. Down that road lies germaphobia, I know some germaphobes. Sometimes a little hard to tolerate. I have two germaphobes on my crew. It becomes competition who be the most germophobic. Or the next time you knock the wifey down and she wants you to kiss the little man in the rowboat....second thoughts at a crucial time like that can be disastrous.

Peace out homeys
 
THIS THREAD.







(Just kidding, sorry!)

For real, my biggest pet peeve, believe it or not, is about women.
I can't stand when women shape their eyebrows poorly. When women shape them so they look like Ronald McDonald it drives me crazy!

If you don't understand, take your two index fingers, curl them into a "C" shape and put them to where your eyebrows would be, it looks ridiculous on women and if you're a woman and your reading this...........I hope I'm not offending you....
 
Well, I wash my hands after going to the bathroom as it is socially the correct thing to do, but since I don't piss all over my hands I'd like to point out the following:

1) When I wake up in the morning I take a shower.
2) In the shower I wash my junk.
3) I then put on clean underwear
4) I put clean pants over my clean underwear over my clean junk.
5) I then go out in the world shaking hands with dirty people and touching doors, desks, windows, whatever... with whatever germs people have.
6) When it comes time to take a leak, I reach in with my now dirty hand and pull out my previously clean junk.

With that logic, I'd be better off washing my pecker in the sink rather than my hands after taking a leak.


Actually you'd be better off washing both hands and pecker. Right?:rockin:
 
When people say "For all intensive purposes..."
-- It should be "For all intents and purposes..."
I don't care how intensive your purposes are.

When people use "Due to the fact…"
-- Unless you're the kind of person that is known for telling one lie after another, just say "Due to...".
Even then, we probably won't believe you.

When people start their sentence with "Basically,..."
-- Just say what you have to say!
It's probably not "basic" after all.

And I'm not a word fascist. I split my infinitives, dangle my participles (from time to time), and have been known to speak not so good.
 
it seems i'm the center of many pet peeves. what else do you guys hate about me? :D


How about your clear sense of justice and compassion? Constantly trying to find the source of conflict and better understanding the motivations of those whose behavior seems irrational? Using logic and clear thought when many around you are flinging hate and intolerance?

C'mon man, it's much easier to follow the pack than to think for yourself! You'll never be popular that way! ;)
 
I'd be offended if I didn't bring up legitimate pet peeves.

Like, say, baseball caps worn backward. The bill is not meant to cover the back of your neck.

The backward caps don't peeve me nearly as much as when they are worn rakishly to the side without the bill curved! I just want to grab the thing off their head, tear off the sticker and curl the bill into a cylinder!!
 
SWMBO ******* about my time spent on HBT, but will spend a whole night texting people as we watch a movie supposedly together.
 
When people say "For all intensive purposes..."
-- It should be "For all intents and purposes..."
I don't care how intensive your purposes are.

actually, i like "for all intent and purposes" ;)

When people use "Due to the fact…"
-- Unless you're the kind of person that is known for telling one lie after another, just say "Due to...".
Even then, we probably won't believe you.

due to the fact that evolution does in fact exist, many people are still wandering around in a dreamworld. hmm. i dunno, i don't mind that one either.

When people start their sentence with "Basically,..."
-- Just say what you have to say!
It's probably not "basic" after all.

well, basically, people that say that just think they are smarter than whoever (whomever?) they are speaking with.

And I'm not a word fascist. I split my infinitives, dangle my participles (from time to time), and have been known to speak not so good.

dude, don't dangle your participles. that's just lewd :D
 
People who replied to this thread to begin with - you have ALL made my list of things that annoy me! ;)
-Me
 
I almost forgot about this. I absolutely hate people touching my food who have no business doing so.

I'm no germo-phobe, I just can't stand people f-ck-ng with my food.

One case that really pissed me off was at a wedding. Its dinner time, salads are served and I have to go break the seal....

... I come back to my table of 8 and everybody put their tomatoes on my salad. It was something like sixteen wedges on top of my salad. They all laughed at my expression when I got back, then got real quite. I was pissed and told the waiter to bring me new salad.

SWMBO said I was being a jerk about it and that I should have picked off the tomatoes. I told her that when she gets her filet mignon we'll all pass it around once like a hot potato and see how she likes it...

SWMBO told me to be quite and drink my wine.... ( I wasn't soused either!)

I can take joke, but frinkin' hate it when people do it with food. :mad:
 
Dear people who say "Warshington" and "liberry",

I have been speaking/readin/writing the English language for just over 26 years now, and I want to issue my concerns with you worthless douchenozzles. There is no goddamned "R" in Washington and libraries are not sweet fruit from a tree, bush, or vine. You have no business placing Rs wherever the **** you like, and it probably wouldn't hurt you to visit a library. Do you realize that speaking like a 3rd grader with an impediment makes you seem like an ignorant ****tard?

In the future, please remove all unnecessary Rs from words like Washington and washing machine, and learn how to pronounce library as if you were an educated adult. I am only trying to help you better yourself.

With love,
Madman

PS: May god strike you down with a firey vengeance is you ignore my heartfelt plea.
 
People at stores that refuse to use the OUT door. Enter on the right, leave on the right.
Don't wait for someone to come in the IN door and then get in their way so they have to hold the door for you before they can go in.

If you do this, please stop. You know who you are.

I should just start going in the OUT door since no one uses it.

Forrest
 
Dear people who say "Warshington" and "liberry",

I have been speaking/readin/writing the English language for just over 26 years now, and I want to issue my concerns with you worthless douchenozzles. There is no goddamned "R" in Washington and libraries are not sweet fruit from a tree, bush, or vine. You have no business placing Rs wherever the **** you like, and it probably wouldn't hurt you to visit a library. Do you realize that speaking like a 3rd grader with an impediment makes you seem like an ignorant ****tard?

In the future, please remove all unnecessary Rs from words like Washington and washing machine, and learn how to pronounce library as if you were an educated adult. I am only trying to help you better yourself.

With love,
Madman

PS: May god strike you down with a firey vengeance is you ignore my heartfelt plea.

And some of those extra Rs can go into words like frustrating.
 
People at stores that refuse to use the OUT door. Enter on the right, leave on the right.
Don't wait for someone to come in the IN door and then get in their way so they have to hold the door for you before they can go in.

If you do this, please stop. You know who you are.

I should just start going in the OUT door since no one uses it.

Forrest

Put in a turn-style like when you enter a subway or a revolving door. :D

I'd like to see them push the door the wrong way...
 
Dear people who say "Warshington" and "liberry",

I have been speaking/readin/writing the English language for just over 26 years now, and I want to issue my concerns with you worthless douchenozzles. There is no goddamned "R" in Washington and libraries are not sweet fruit from a tree, bush, or vine. You have no business placing Rs wherever the **** you like, and it probably wouldn't hurt you to visit a library. Do you realize that speaking like a 3rd grader with an impediment makes you seem like an ignorant ****tard?

In the future, please remove all unnecessary Rs from words like Washington and washing machine, and learn how to pronounce library as if you were an educated adult. I am only trying to help you better yourself.

With love,
Madman

PS: May god strike you down with a firey vengeance is you ignore my heartfelt plea.
Irony alert, irony alert. A big rant on the language complete with an incorrect word.:D
 
People at stores that refuse to use the OUT door. Enter on the right, leave on the right.
Don't wait for someone to come in the IN door and then get in their way so they have to hold the door for you before they can go in.

If you do this, please stop. You know who you are.

I should just start going in the OUT door since no one uses it.

Forrest


Related to this are the business around here with double doors who can't be bothered to unlock one or the other when opening in the morning. SWMBO and I went to lunch on Friday to a Mexican restaurant (coincidentally, it is right next to my LHBS) and the 'out' portion of the door is always latched. Every time I go to leave, I run into the door because it won't yield!
 
Related to this are the business around here with double doors who can't be bothered to unlock one or the other when opening in the morning. SWMBO and I went to lunch on Friday to a Mexican restaurant (coincidentally, it is right next to my LHBS) and the 'out' portion of the door is always latched. Every time I go to leave, I run into the door because it won't yield!
A wise guy would say you probably should have learned your lesson by now.:D

I'll just say, I hate when that happens.
 
1) **** people who wear brand new hats (especially Yankee hats) with all the stickers and tags and **** still on them, cocked to one side, and zero bend in the brim
2) People who say "idear". If you can't pronounce the word, I don't want to hear about said ideas
3) People who pronounce the "g" in hanger. It is not a Hanngur
 
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