Obnoxious Football Trash Talk Thread

[Homercidal]

Yes, hot.

And she seems very intelligent and speaks well too.

She seems like the kind of girl you hang out with at the sports bar watching sports drinking beer and then later you kinda want to take to bed, but then you think it's like taking your best friend to bed, which is kind of embarrassing, but then you're like, "I ain't ashamed of my sexuality!" and then you are all like, "Yes, let's get it on!", but then she's like, "You're totally not in my league, dude. Sorry. I'm going home with this guy because he knows how to serve it up low and inside. Get it?"

And then she leaves with your ACTUAL friend, who's much better looking, has more money, and can read the offense better at any given game. And she thinks it's no big deal because you're just friends and she's got a LOT of those.

 

[paulthenurse]

You're sharing WAY too much personal history.

 

[user 574]

Homer, you'd have to prove it through your sensual massage savvy skills

 

[Cape Brewing]

Yeah.. the Pats are pretty good still.

Jesus... it's been FORever it feels like

 

[Homercidal]

Homer, you'd have to prove it through your sensual massage savvy skills

I know, but I never get the chance to!

I have come to the conclusion that I'm so personable that the ladies quickly see me more as a quirky friend than a ruggedly handsome one-night-stand fantasy date.

I still haven't ruled out the fact that I can't help myself trying to look down their shirt, though. I blame genetics.

 

[HoppyDaze]

Did you guys see Andrew Luck's beard sweating last night? It was like the beard was its own entity...

There has to be video of that somewhere on the line.

 

[Homercidal]

I don't have any desire to see Andrew Luck's beard sweat, but knock yourself out.

 

[day_trippr]

"Oregon State"

The punchline to its own joke...

Cheers!

 

[motobrewer]

Nobody here is an Oregon state fan, *******

 

[day_trippr]

Figured Hoppy might be shopping for a new team, given Oregon is toast and the Seahawks don't look much better...

Cheers!

 

[Cape Brewing]

Fail cover up attempt fail.

Sorry bro... just gotta call a fair game

 

[1977Brewer]

So you guys will find this hilarious. Semi-pro football meathead from my hometown actually predicted a 28-21 Cowboys victory tomorrow.

Poor guy. He's been taking head shots for chump change for too long.

 

[Cape Brewing]

(Blank stare)

 

[bluemoose]

Hilarious. No, really.

 

[1977Brewer]

(Blank stare)

Exactly. I'm a Cowboys Homer for life and I have no illusions that we're gonna win this. I'm just hoping we score.

 

[wobrien]

I hope they don't even cross midfield

 

[bob1852]

Washington State? Really, hoppy? Washington State?

 

[bluemoose]

What a suckfest the early games are.

 

[motobrewer]

Ohhhh hoppy!!

 

[day_trippr]

Oh, wow. Look at that...

Cheers! (another tough week to be Hoppy )

 

[motobrewer]

Hoppy, look at the bright side - if you take the number of wins the Seahawks have, and add the number of wins the ducks have, you get...the number of wins the packers have!!

 

[Cape Brewing]

Hahaha... They lost to the Bengals???

God the NFC sucks...

 

[HoppyDaze]

**** your mothers in the throat

 

[1977Brewer]

Hey Pats fans, does your boy know how to run? Asking for a friend.

 

[Cape Brewing]

I dont get the joke

 

[Cape Brewing]

**** your mothers in the throat

Why so uppity bro?

 

[1977Brewer]

I dont get the joke

Now I don't either.

Damn this is not an interesting game.

 

[HoppyDaze]

Tom Brady can't complete a pass further than 10 yards. He's terrible

 

[bluemoose]

Why would you ever change up a dominant offensive line? Why?

 

[JonGrafto]

That and being sacked 5 times in a half. What a dumpster fire of a game.