HBT Official Memorable Quotes Thread

[EvilTOJ]

Hangovers and Apfelwein

Ughhh....does that aspect of apfelwein where you felt like you got gang banged in your eye socket go away with aging whatsoever?

 

[Revvy]

Hot off the presses from the master!!!

I dunno...unzip your pants, take a look down at your crotchial area, and tell me if you see a bunch of dog hair. If so, then, yeah, you probably f*cked a dog.

 

[McKBrew]

Hot off the presses from the master!!!

Beat me to it. I couldn't find the memorable quotes thread.

 

[Amiaji]

Mine was sodomised to death by the rabbit.
You ever heard a Guinea Pig scream?

Poor little guinea pig.

 

[user 574]

Thanks to the guys with constructive posts

The rest of you, F*CK YOU, get off your high horse you elitist, ass c*nts. Me and my mates HAVE read about home brew, obviously not some specific parts, I don't care if you're old or young, your response to our few simple questions was patronizing and useless. Obviously trying to feel 'big' and making up for short-comings, get a life.

When flying insults about immaturity, take a look in the mirror.

Seems that Moshiach made some revisions to the post however. EAC appears to have been replaced with EUB.


Done Evan!

Fight Club. Kill it if need be mods.

 

[Evan!]

Seems that Moshiach made some revisions to the post however. EAC appears to have been replaced with EUB.


Fight Club. Kill it if need be mods.

So change it back, you have the power!

 

[user 574]

Hitting the ban(ne)d wagon.

Me Grampy said to watch out for city slickin brewin fulla/chit buttheads like you.
I know my stuf, pal.
I come here to get the dice on the first lick.
Iffen you folks can give me a decent starter, (why I am here)
I can do the rest.

Copper

And the classic reply

I'm from South GA and even I don't understand...

 

[McKBrew]

I would move your Johnson outside of the keezer. It is too moist of an environment and your Johnson will rust if left in there too long.

OMG, I wouldn't want my Johnson to rust.

 

[Revvy]

Hitting the ban(ne)d wagon.



And the classic reply

Oh please no!!!.....Copper posts are like zombies....they never die.


ooops...I inadvertantly zombified this thread...sorry

 

[homebrewer_99]

Iditarod...something you'll never hear a lesbian sportscaster say with a straight face...

 

[98EXL]

OMG Evan! is on a freaking roll...I think maybe the fumes from the sour beer is gitin' to 'em

 

[bigjohnmilford]

just ran across this little gem.

I have manscaped before, and well in terms of itchyness, I have to say the face is winning over the nether regions, but it could have to do with guys and girls being built differently.

 

[EvilTOJ]

From the Add Yourself thread, being commented on in chat....

yuri are you going to try lighting my vag ina on fire again?

 

[Revvy]

Hehehehehehehe!

Ughhh....does that aspect of apfelwein where you felt like you got gang banged in your eye socket go away with aging whatsoever? Just got a little tipsy off a couple pints of 3 week fresh Apfelwein the other night and I could have sworn I was the star of a porno titled "Man skull orifices and hard things" the night before. It hurts in all the wrong ways.

 

[Short Drive]

How to critique some ones beer.

Yooper is a girl. She knows how to say things nicely. Listen to her.
Me personally, I'd just puke on his shoes.

 

[DeathBrewer]

here's a good one...

As a discussion on BMC grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving urine approaches one.

 

[98EXL]

The "must be obeyed" is more realistically from her monopoly on the household sex supply.

That is so true, yet so fuuuuuunnnnny

 

[98EXL]

and just found this (omitting some words)

If you wish to pull out...let me know.

 

[Revvy]

I dunno....looking at Deathbrewer's AV along with this quote just struck me as funny.

....i enjoy a caucasian every now and again

I wonder if he likes them with fava beans and a nice chianti?

 

[DeathBrewer]

 

[Kai]

In a discussion of birds who brain themselves on windows:

I wouldn't call 'em "stupid". They've evolved over the course of millions of years; glass is an invention of the last like .000001% of their existence...

PS: in accordance with the Kansas state school board, I'm required to post the following alternative: 5000 years ago, god made stupid birds.

 

[NWernBrewer]

olllllo on Evan!

If Dan Snyder wants to name his team the "The Washington Fire in a Crowded Theater Ass Flaming ***** Tahitians" and demands that everyone plays in Black Face then the libertarian in me says, "Hells Yes, Freedom!!! You go you crazy goat F*cker!", but in fact he would really be a ****** 'cause it ain't right to base your empire on the downtrodding of those with the skin browner than yours.

So he has the right, but he's a douchie.

 

[Donasay]

"douchewaddle." Feeling creative this morning, eh?

Can any word be used as a modifier? Maybe I'll start using the term "doucheboat", or "douchemug." Say, that's got a ring to it. "Chuck Norris is a douchemug."

Don't dis Chuck Norris!

 

[Freezeblade]

"douchewaddle." Feeling creative this morning, eh?

Can any word be used as a modifier? Maybe I'll start using the term "doucheboat", or "douchemug."

My friends do this all the time, words such as Douchecanoe, DoucheFlute, or the ever-famous DoucheBarge

ok, onto a quote:

Well, amylase enzymes are present in saliva....

 

[EvilTOJ]

What? They are present in saliva! Why's everyone looking at me like that?

 

[Revvy]

What? They are present in saliva! Why's everyone looking at me like that?

I know...I'm still scratching my head wondering why Freezeblade thought it was quote worthy...

Maybe he never heard of Chica Beer....

chicha is/was make by converting starch into sugar by chewing it, and letting disastase enzymes in human saliva do the starch/sugar conversion - you can do this yourself by chewing bread for a long time, and noting how it gets sweeter. The chewed starch material (maize, cassava, whatever) is spat out and dried, or semi-dried, until the brewer is ready to soak it and ferment it. Some sources say the name chicha is derived from the Spanish word for “spit."

 

[Freezeblade]

out of context it just seems a bit off, that's all

 

[Bob]

*punt to the change-purse*

I can't explain it; it's just funny. To me. And my tiny, easily-amused brain.

Bob

 

[BigKahuna]

... My sister passed out, my wife is still puking this afternoon and my head felt like it got smashed between 2 bricks.

.

This stuff is amazing but holy sheet it sneaks up on you faster then a phantom fart.
.

This is a 2'fer One.

 

[EvilTOJ]

Revvy, that saliva quote was from the GaP thread. And Freezeblade is right, everything is funnier out of context.