Funny things you've overheard about beer

[Hopinista]

Well, I made seamen on CGC Decisive, then went to Boatswain's Mate

 

[knyland]

Well, I made seamen on CGC Decisive, then went to Boatswain's Mate A School, then Coxswain School. I made third class at a rescue station, second too.
There are more fun words to say!

Was a SN on the Polar Sea then BM3 at a surf station then BM2 BM1 at a heavy wx station / ANT/ River tender/ another HX Station hope I make BMC Soon.

 

[JohnSand]

Good for you, Boats! I spent six years active, made BM2 on Cape Horn (95' PB) I made first in the reserve, but didn't stay. I did love the service.

And I'll tie in a funny beer thing from my CG days: We were in San Juan PR at a notorious club and bordello. Some of the guys were hiring girls, some just drinking. But the girls still sought to make a sale. I was sitting with two engineers who had snuck in some beers from the PX. A chubby, not so pretty hooker was trying to sell me a good time. I wasn't buying. She grabbed one of the BMCs from my buddy, went to the bar for two cups of ice. Back at the table, she poured herself and me a beer on the rocks! Then she sat on my lap and went into great detail about what she would do for me, and what I could do to her. When I still refused, she stood, put her hands on her hips, and in her heavy accent announced: "You are queer!" and stalked away. We all laughed, and I drank the beer/ice.
What can I say? I'm a romantic.

 

[EdMerican]

Just the other day at work I was telling a buddy about the imperial stout I had just bottled. Another guy overheard and asked what temp I would serve it at. I told him I serve all my beers at about 50 degrees. Yet another eavesdropper chines in and says "but doesn't warm beer give you a worse hangover?"

 

[rlmiller10]

First time I'd seen that acronym. Figured it out though. I'm still pretty new. Started last fall but I'm active duty navy in sea duty so I'm only on my 6th batch. 1 bottled, 1 fermenting, and currently brewing 1. Non ready to drink since I've been back sadly


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Lipps. There are several present or former navy types on here. The attention to detail and record keeping that you learn on a boat or ship will serve you well in brewing.

Friendly group here so ask questions and learn. And stock up on brewing books for the next cruise.


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[Northbanu]

Yup my nephue on his 21 bday I offered him a beer and he said they all tast the same and there nasty. Well I hand him a craft brew ( dont remember wich kind) and he said wow thats beer? Glad to say he stopped playing beer pong( choking down crappy beer with the beast light or ice) and now enjoys founders dirty bastard.

When I play beer pong, it has to be with BMC. And I prolly play too much beer pong.

 

[microbusbrewery]

Just did a little getaway weekend with my wife and some friends of ours to Grand Junction, CO. The focus of the trip was on the local wineries, but we did stop into one of the local brew pubs for lunch, then again for happy hour. Started off with their IPA which was pretty good. I asked the waitress how their stout was and she said "I don't know, I've never liked dark beer." At happy hour I asked a different waitress about another beer, and she admitted she'd never tried any of them. In her defense, she said she'd just turned 21 a few weeks ago, but damn, either try them or lie and say they're really good.

 

[Squad1Guy]

Not really sure if this is funny or just a head scratcher.

I was in a beer bar that has 75 beers the other day. It is a sea of hop bombs. I asked if they had a pale ale. The bartender suggested Bells Two Hearted Ale.

Really? Have we become so obsessed with hops that a very good IPA gets suggested as a pale ale. Is this happening everywhere?

I had been trying to find a "representative" example of an English Bitter for about 3 weeks. In every store I went (several touting the fact that they had over 400 craft beers in stock), it was pretty much all IPAs. To paraphrase Henry Ford, "You can get any style you want, as long as it's an IPA."

 

[forstmeister]

I had been trying to find a "representative" example of an English Bitter for about 3 weeks. In every store I went (several touting the fact that they had over 400 craft beers in stock), it was pretty much all IPAs. To paraphrase Henry Ford, "You can get any style you want, as long as it's an IPA."

Here are commercial examples of the style. Some may be available near you.

 

[forstmeister]

View attachment 199064

Here are commercial examples of the style. Some may be available near you.

By the way, that screen capture came from the BJCP style guidelines app for iPhone.

 

[cpl-america]

View attachment 199064

Here are commercial examples of the style. Some may be available near you.

Green king IPA made the list? Maybe a long time ago. Green king is pretty much the bmc of ales. Although they just opened a small craft brewery that has a nice bitter. But they are responsible for buying pubs around the country and "starbucking" them.

 

[hunter_le five]

Green king IPA made the list? Maybe a long time ago. Green king is pretty much the bmc of ales. Although they just opened a small craft brewery that has a nice bitter. But they are responsible for buying pubs around the country and "starbucking" them.

Reminds me of that scene in The World's End, when they guys are reenacting the pub crawl, and the first two pubs they visit look exactly the same because they were bought out by chains since the last time they had visited.

 

[GrogNerd]

Reminds me of that scene in The World's End, when they guys are reenacting the pub crawl, and the first two pubs they visit look exactly the same because they were bought out by chains since the last time they had visited.

funny thing heard about beer, from that movie

Gary King: We're going to see this through to the bitter end. Or... lager end.

 

[cpl-america]

Lol. They were definitely talking about Greene king. Always the worst beer selection. Free house is the way to go.

 

[Paradigm]

While I do agree that it's funny, at one point in my beer life I preferred Bud Light over Coors Light because "it has so much more flavor".

I still stand beside my statement that Rolling Rock is the best of the canned "party beer."

 

[unionrdr]

I like a cold 'rock once in awhile myself. But it's probably nostalgia in my case. Still not bad stuff. But since the refinance,I can afford better brew & hb'ing every month again.

 

[schokie]

Lol. They were definitely talking about Greene king. Always the worst beer selection. Free house is the way to go.

I agree that Greene King IPA is rather bland. However, some of their other lines are pretty good. They're just not widely distributed is the problem. In any case, it's far better than the Stella or Ice Cold Guinness you find in every pub.

My local is a Greene King pub, but with a publican-picked menu and beer line up. Not everything the company does is bad!

 

[cpl-america]

I do like some. My friend works at the brewery so I have got to taste quite a few beers from them. But I will take a hob goblin, or hopping hare day. I agree that I would choose Greene king over Guinness or Stella. Where do you live shokie?

 

[speeddemon190]

I stopped by Frankenmuth brewery sunday, on my way home from the cabin this weekend. Waiting for my turn to be seated (place was really busy) and a lady walks up to the counter where they sell beer wine shirts hats and growlers....and goes OH WOW you brew the beer here???? I must have had a pretty dumbfounded look on my face because everyone with me looked at me then started laughing. What surprised me more than the fact she was standing in the brewery, is that the tables everyone sits at are in direct view of all the brewing equipment, so even if she did miss the BREWERY part in the sign.....there is massive shiney tanks in the glass room????

 

[n240sxguy]

On a side note, what did you think of Frankenmuth brewery?


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[SiriusStarr]

I received this text from a family member who knows I'm a beer nut and into brewing (anonymized for their sake).

I had a Belgian style beer this past week that I think you would like. The brand name is "Shock Top" and it is sold in limited volumes and is brewed in Colorado.

I don't even know where to begin... :smack:

 

[n240sxguy]

It's limited only to the amount they can cram on the shelf.


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[dkwolf]

I received this text from a family member who knows I'm a beer nut and into brewing (anonymized for their sake).



I don't even know where to begin... :smack:

I don't.....

...how......


...unnngh...


My brain hurts.

 

[unionrdr]

Maybe some ear bleach would help?

 

[BreezyBrew]

These days it's pretty amazing people haven't even heard of Blue Moon or Shock Top. There's quite a bit of advertising around here for it.

 

[Hopinista]

These days it's pretty amazing people haven't even heard of Blue Moon or Shock Top. There's quite a bit of advertising around here for it.

Blue Moon is at least inoffensive and somewhat drinkable. I had a Shock Top only was, it was at a concert. It was so bad I almost had to hold my nose to drink it. I'd have poured it out but I paid $15 for it.

 

[drives_a_bike]

My friend owns a brewery in Custer, SD, a local restaurant that boasts being a "Taphouse" was carrying his pale ale. So my wife and I went down there hoping they still had it on tap...she noticed that they also had his stout on the list of beers they have when we walked in. We were seated and asked about those beers, the waitress responded with, "I have no idea...we probably don't have it because that list hasn't been updated in like, FOREVER". The list is written on a chalk board, why couldn't someone erase it or draw an X through it if they don't have it anymore...I was annoyed but whatever, it's what happened when the waitress came back that made me want to leave. She walks up and says, "we don't have the pale ale, but an excellent substitute is Boulevard Tank 7". I said, "that's not even the same style of beer". She didn't seem to care, and asked me if I wanted it anyway...so we left.

I wasn't trying to be a dick, I just think if your restaurant name is going to have the word TAPHOUSE in it, your servers should have at least a little beer knowledge. I'm not asking for total beer connoisseurs for servers, but come on...

 

[GrogNerd]

I wasn't trying to be a dick, I just think if your restaurant name is going to have the word TAPHOUSE in it, your servers should have at least a little beer knowledge. I'm not asking for total beer connoisseurs for servers, but come on...

you are absolutely correct.

management fail. training fail.

I just went into a local brewery scheduled to open soon to see if they were hiring yet. our brewclub meets there, the owner knows me, knows I brew and said, "sorry, we just hired an assistant brewer. the only openings would be in the taproom, but we're not hiring for another 3 weeks or so."

I told him working in the taproom would be fine, trying to sell him on the point that it would be useful to have someone there who knows the brewing process, knows a little about styles of beer to maybe help train the staff and keep them educated.

hope that was convincing, really could use the work

 

[VT-NAV]

.... She walks up and says, "we don't have the pale ale, but an excellent substitute is Boulevard Tank 7". I said, "that's not even the same style of beer". She didn't seem to care, and asked me if I wanted it anyway...so we left.

I wasn't trying to be a dick, I just think if your restaurant name is going to have the word TAPHOUSE in it, your servers should have at least a little beer knowledge.

What an OUTRAGE!

You realize that expecting every waitress to memorize the BJCP style guidelines as well as the category into which each of the restaurant's beers falls - and then repeat that information without making an error is a bit of an unrealistic expectation, no? Walking out on a waitress because she has failed to live up to that expectation seems beyond the pale (pun intended - I know, I'm hilarious!).

I'm not asking for total beer connoisseurs for servers, but come on...

Except... you are. Yeah I get it - she works at a place called The Taphouse. But, she makes $2.15 an hour plus whatever tips she can make serving rude customers, some of whom simply walk out because she was unable to dazzle them with her command of brewing science.

I doubt she was very sorry to see such a lovely customer go, but it probably hurt her earnings for the night because she had to wait for someone else to get seated in her section.

Somewhere, on another internet forum, is a thread titled "Jerky things customers have done" with a different version of this same story.

 

[troy2000]

I received this text from a family member who knows I'm a beer nut and into brewing (anonymized for their sake).



I don't even know where to begin... :smack:

I hope you began by thanking them... they meant well.