Funny things you've overheard about beer

[wailingguitar]

Drinking at my buddy's house (who I brew with), and his wife asked if she should keep the bottle we had just drank to reuse. I told her it was a Belgian bottle and we typically don't use them...there was a long conversation about the fact that we'd need a corker, so I showed her one in the Northern Brewer catalog that was on the table, and she said,

"A Portuguese floor corker? Sounds like a crazy sex move!"

I haven't laughed that hard in a REALLY long time.

Your buddy is a happy man...

 

[croakerj]

Your buddy is a happy man...

If his wife is a floor

 

[freshhoarse]

if his wife is a floor

lmao!!

 

[Vellum]

Went to county grill in Hampton last night. I saw they had a rogue beer on tap, being from Washington state I was most interested in it. They labeled the beer on the menu as "100% Rogue Dead Gun Ale." I was a little confused having never heard of dead "gun" before. I asked the bartender if it really was dead "gun" or if it could be dead "guy." Her reply was it is a great ale, very smooth, one of the few ales she likes versus the many IPAs they had on tap. I decided to order the rogue which upon tasting was definetly dead GUY.

In the mean time my wife leans over and says sarcastically, "so....that was he answer to your question right?"

I replied "no worries, I speak misinformed bartender very well" and proceeded to enjoy my dead guy which I find on tap very rarely here in VA.

 

[CreamyGoodness]

I usually cut servers a lot of slack since it is a rough job. My coworker took me to lunch for a job well done on Friday and insisted I get a beer. "Ok, can I get a Guinness?" "Kin its?"

I blinked and narrowed my eyes a bit.

Her *giggle* "oh KINITTS! I think we have that!" she walked over to the bartender who sent her back to me. "Oh Im sorry we dont have Guinness" (she got it this time) "would you like a black session lager?"

"Actually could I see the list please? Ok, how about the IPA here" *points*

She walks over, and walks right back "Im sorry, we dont have some of the beers on the list anymore. The bartender suggested Founders Porter"

"Ok, yeah sure, I'll take that"

"Glass?"

"Yes please"

She came back with a red wine glass. At that point, I would have drank BMC through a straw just to not have to engage further. I kept my mouth shut.

 

[DrunkleJon]

I usually cut servers a lot of slack since it is a rough job. My coworker took me to lunch for a job well done on Friday and insisted I get a beer. "Ok, can I get a Guinness?" "Kin its?"

I blinked and narrowed my eyes a bit.

Her *giggle* "oh KINITTS! I think we have that!" she walked over to the bartender who sent her back to me. "Oh Im sorry we dont have Guinness" (she got it this time) "would you like a black session lager?"

"Actually could I see the list please? Ok, how about the IPA here" *points*

She walks over, and walks right back "Im sorry, we dont have some of the beers on the list anymore. The bartender suggested Founders Porter"

"Ok, yeah sure, I'll take that"

"Glass?"

"Yes please"

She came back with a red wine glass. At that point, I would have drank BMC through a straw just to not have to engage further. I kept my mouth shut.

Awww... how cute. it talks. (the witstaff not you)

Wow though. That is painful but you seem to have restrained yourself well.

 

[progmac]

She came back with a red wine glass. At that point, I would have drank BMC through a straw just to not have to engage further. I kept my mouth shut.

I started drinking some beer out of wine glasses. I think it improves the experience of good beer.

Not sure that was what the bar tender was going for, though.

 

[CreamyGoodness]

I think the poor dear had a bit of a neutral zone above her head. It was almost as if she was categorically unqualified to do what she was doing

 

[Eugenio]

Just overheard at the gym:

Bro 1 - What should we get for beer?
Bro 2 - Get the biggest keg you can.
Bro 1 - Ok, ill get a bud light or something.
Bro 2 - Nah dawg, get a real beer, like a Bud or a Coors.

 

[bergen69]

Just overheard at the gym:

Bro 1 - What should we get for beer?
Bro 2 - Get the biggest keg you can.
Bro 1 - Ok, ill get a bud light or something.
Bro 2 - Nah dawg, get a real beer, like a Bud or a Coors.

I would have said..."forget a keg, go for a hogshead of MGD, you gotta live a little!"

 

[Bierliebhaber]

Just overheard at the gym:

Bro 1 - What should we get for beer?
Bro 2 - Get the biggest keg you can.
Bro 1 - Ok, ill get a bud light or something.
Bro 2 - Nah dawg, get a real beer, like a Bud or a Coors.

What's supposed to be the funny part? I count three:

1) "Get the biggest keg you can."
2) "Nah dawg..."
3) Thinking bud is somehow more of a beer than bud light.

 

[DrunkleJon]

What's supposed to be the funny part? I count three:

1) "Get the biggest keg you can."
2) "Nah dawg..."
3) Thinking bud is somehow more of a beer than bud light.

but, but its not light. Or lite, or however they decide to spell it.

 

[Onihige]

Not really overheard, or about beer. But close enough!

Reading a Swedish beer book, they're currently explaining exactly what a beer is - and how it differs from wine, cider and mead...

"Beer is fermented from grains. Wine is fermented from grapes. Cider should be made from apples. And mead was made from honey."

Okay... first of all, should? And secondly... was? Is no one making mead anymore, or did we just stop using honey?

 

[Leadgolem]

...Wine is fermented from grapes...

Huh, I thought this was funny too.

 

[BeerInABelly]

Well I finally read through this whole thread after a few days of coming back to it.. Funniest thing ive heard about beer lately ? Reading the acronym BMC for roughly 150 pages or so without knowing what it meant and just assuming it referred to the fizzy yellow light lagers over there in the USA.. Then finding out I am correct

 

[TAK]

Patron: Once you go IPA, It's hard to go back.
Waiter: Well, I recomend the brown, but a spinoff of an IPA is the ESB.

 

[croakerj]

Patron: Once you go IPA, It's hard to go back.
Waiter: Well, I recomend the brown, but a spinoff of an IPA is the ESB.

That is an extra special waiter.
He doesn't know beer 10% of the time all the time. As far as waiters are concerned though; he needs to start a school cause beer is not in their scope. Usually

 

[gmcapone]

I had a waiter tell me the other day that they got a new beer in that is really refreshing. It's oddly enough made with grass. It's called st. Arnold's lawn mower.

 

[mattd2]

I had a waiter tell me the other day that they got a new beer in that is really refreshing. It's oddly enough made with grass. It's called st. Arnold's lawn mower.

had the waiter been smoking some grass

 

[gmcapone]

had the waiter been smoking some grass

I wouldn't doubt. I actually ordered it and played along saying I Can taste the grass. My wife was hitting me under the table.

 

[Craigmn]

On the sign for Baker Street Pub it says "stouts and ales". I want to ask them what the difference is

 

[wailingguitar]

On the sign for Baker Street Pub it says "stouts and ales". I want to ask them what the difference is

There is a historical precedence for this; it was common to see signs and advertisements that would say something to the effect of "Brewers of Ale, Porter and Stout" with the "Ale" referring to bitter, pale ale and IPA. Here is an example of an ad:

http://zythophile.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/marrian-no-3-ad.jpg

 

[ktblunden]

In Vons yesterday I noticed the aisle was labeled "Beer and Micro Brews." So "Beer" apparently means BMC and "Micro Brews" is stuff with flavor.

 

[timrox1212]

I brewed a blonde ale a few months ago and the mother in law wanted to try my home brews. She took one sip and says "Ooo tastes good, reminds me of Sam Adams." I then ask "which Sam Adams" she replies with "I didn't know Sam Adam had different flavors". I preceded to just smile and leave the room. That's what I get for sharing my home brew with the in laws.

 

[Keith66]

I drank Sam Adams Boston Lager for years before I ever saw anything else from them. Even today, 99% of what I see from them is their BL. Coming from a MIL, I'd take that as a compliment.

 

[timrox1212]

I drank Sam Adams Boston Lager for years before I ever saw anything else from them. Even today, 99% of what I see from them is their BL. Coming from a MIL, I'd take that as a compliment.

Well she only drank about 1/2 a glass so I doubt she liked it. And it tasted nothing like Boston lager lol. She was just trying to be nice.

 

[Keith66]

Well she only drank about 1/2 a glass so I doubt she liked it. And it tasted nothing like Boston lager lol. She was just trying to be nice.

+1 Could be worse.

 

[bleme]

Well she only drank about 1/2 a glass so I doubt she liked it. And it tasted nothing like Boston lager lol. She was just trying to be nice.

To the majority of people, BMC means smooth, easy drinking, flavorless beer. Guinness means dark beer. Sam Adams means a lighter beer with actual flavor.

That is probably the only beer that she could relate to.

 

[CreamyGoodness]

I think the word "flavors" wasnt the worst she could have used. If she meant "I didnt know Sam Adams came in different STYLES" we wouldnt be able to fault her much at all.

Its funny though, I suppose.

 

[drives_a_bike]

I brewed a blonde ale a few months ago and the mother in law wanted to try my home brews. She took one sip and says "Ooo tastes good, reminds me of Sam Adams." I then ask "which Sam Adams" she replies with "I didn't know Sam Adam had different flavors". I preceded to just smile and leave the room. That's what I get for sharing my home brew with the in laws.

This same thing has been posted a few times on this thread...I know because I was one of them. Haha. Yeah, just take it as a compliment