Funny things you've overheard about beer

[drainbamage]

I think there must be a rule for writers of mass-market TV shows: they are encouraged to make references to cultural phenomena as long as they're at least three years old and the reference is watered down so as to be a caricature of the actual cultural phenomenon referenced. See: every police procedural's inevitable MMORPG (online video game) and hacktivism/internet stalking episodes. Their "cutting-edge" imaginary video games have graphics that would have embarrassed a game designer a decade ago and every investigator infiltrating a shady web forum spends time instant messaging and emailing the forum members, who he then meets living half a mile away from him.

Excellent synopsis of why those shows feel so hokey. In the old days, the cop shows would just have the detectives go to a strip club so they could slip some scantily-clad women in the background. Now every episode has to be built around some obscure (or just treated as such) subculture: Gamers! Furries! Black metal fans! Then, inevitably one character will be a fan of that subculture so they can explain it awkwardly to the other characters and the audience ("Well actually Dectective, I was a huge Golgothan Crypt fan back in college. You keep calling death metal, but black metal is totally different because...").

 

[unionrdr]

Yeah, I've noticed this in late-night cop shows like NYPD blue, & the other show with an aging Tom Selleck. Seems a little bit like type-casting to me.

 

[Trippel-A]

I think there must be a rule for writers of mass-market TV shows: they are encouraged to make references to cultural phenomena as long as they're at least three years old and the reference is watered down so as to be a caricature of the actual cultural phenomenon referenced. See: every police procedural's inevitable MMORPG (online video game) and hacktivism/internet stalking episodes. Their "cutting-edge" imaginary video games have graphics that would have embarrassed a game designer a decade ago and every investigator infiltrating a shady web forum spends time instant messaging and emailing the forum members, who he then meets living half a mile away from him.

This is just the craft beer/homebrewing version of that. "I'm gonna brew him up an IPA for dinner" is the homebrewing equivalent of "he's been stalking the other players whose characters are more gooder than his by infecting their computer with an IP address wrapped in a keylogger wrapped in a trojan wrapped in a virus that he attaches to a song that they downloaded from Napster. It's really high-technique, frontline cyber-stalking. Social Media. Computers. Floppy Drives. Ultrabook."

Incidentally, spoiler alert, it's always the co-founder of the social networking platform that made the victim rich. You know, the guy who was bullied out before the IPO that turned it into a bloated corporate nightmare instead of the hip underground project the jilted murderer had designed it to be. He's not doing it because of the money, but to preserve the ideal he was chasing when he created the platform in the first place.

Tangent aside, those Bones writers are probably avid homebrewers themselves. They came up with this great episode-long gag about fast-acting sacc. c. and it got cut down and down and down by some QC guy who insists that the viewers wouldn't understand until it was boiled down to a five-liner with the hip word "IPA" in it.

And now rant aside, the best I can do for a topic-relevant post at the moment would be collecting the champagne bottles from last night's Thanksgiving party at our kindergarten for beer or mead (it was bubbly grape and apple juice, in case you're worried about the state of Chinese kindergarten education). My co-worker made sure to give me the (champagne) corks with the bottles, saying, "I'm not really sure how you're supposed to get them back in the bottles, though."

RIPPED from today's HEADLINES!!!!

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Seriously, though, what's with this weird quoting everything you've found from years ago thing you're doing?

Give it a few more hundred pages and he'll be able to respond to this

 

[DrunkleJon]

Seriously, though, what's with this weird quoting everything you've found from years ago thing you're doing?

Hes just catching up on the thread. Its easy to get carried away. I must say though it is kinda interesting seeing the likes on old posts because it reminds me of funny things I said in this thread.

 

[joshesmusica]

Hes just catching up on the thread. Its easy to get carried away. I must say though it is kinda interesting seeing the likes on old posts because it reminds me of funny things I said in this thread.

Except the things he's responding to are some of the lamest ones...

 

[joshesmusica]

Give it a few more hundred pages and he'll be able to respond to this

I hate it that LOL is so misused that I actually have to tell you that I seriously did laugh out loud at this one!

 

[Trippel-A]

Seriously, though, what's with this weird quoting everything you've found from years ago thing you're doing?

Well, it's obviously to get a response from you.

 

[mattrox]

I'm a little buzzed due to a Sunday 'arvo' session and this metric pint of Rye IPA is going down too well @ 7.3%, but I found this 1st paragraph mildly amusing but certainly good enough to share given the statistics, economics and well actuallys I've read up to this point.

 

[1977Brewer]

Hes just catching up on the thread. Its easy to get carried away. I must say though it is kinda interesting seeing the likes on old posts because it reminds me of funny things I said in this thread.

Yeah. He liked a gem of mine from May. I'm funny.

 

[mattrox]

I'll take a quick stab at this.

An American Pale Ale is a light(ish) pale colored beer with a notable hop character with American style hops.

Most beers described as an India Pale Ale are hopped to an extreme degree and have a hop profile that smacks you in the face.

An Australian Pale Ale describes any number of cheap swills that are made in Australia. :cross:

Well actually, Australian pale ales are under the BJC-thingy as Australian Sparkling ales. There are only 2 commercial examples left, Coopers Pale Ale and Coopers Sparkling Ale. Both using Pride of Ringwood as bittering hops with no aroma addition. The Coopers yeast produces pear esters at ale fermentation temperatures so in the Hot Aussie summer a cold Coopers pale or sparkling hits the spot. And it is metric **** ton better than VB, West End or other adjunct swill available at the same price point.

BTW you can buy a Coppers in a bottle and "roll your Coopers" before you pour to help achieve a cloudy ale appearance and not suffer at the thunder box after a session.

 

[mattrox]

So if an ipa isn't pale shouldn't it be called something else. It may not be considered a funny thing I heard about beer, but I think it should be sometimes especially when it's a black India pale ale.

Originally, 'pale' meant pale compared with a stout. So a pale ale can actually be "dark" in a BMC drinkers vocabulary.

 

[brisboy]

Well actually, Australian pale ales are under the BJC-thingy as Australian Sparkling ales. There are only 2 commercial examples left, Coopers Pale Ale and Coopers Sparkling Ale. Both using Pride of Ringwood as bittering hops with no aroma addition. The Coopers yeast produces pear esters at ale fermentation temperatures so in the Hot Aussie summer a cold Coopers pale or sparkling hits the spot. And it is metric **** ton better than VB, West End or other adjunct swill available at the same price point.

BTW you can buy a Coppers in a bottle and "roll your Coopers" before you pour to help achieve a cloudy ale appearance and not suffer at the thunder box after a session.

Picked up a six pack of Pale Ale yesterday. Lovely stuff. Coopers Mild is very nice too. Not worth comparing something like VB to it, that's just insulting.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

Originally, 'pale' meant pale compared with a stout. So a pale ale can actually be "dark" in a BMC drinkers vocabulary.

my in-laws think anything darker than a BL (like a regular Bud) is a dark beer. I don't trust BMC drinkers judgement on beer.

 

[1977Brewer]

my in-laws think anything darker than a BL (like a regular Bud) is a dark beer. I don't trust BMC drinkers judgement on beer.

Or on anything else. Nor should you.

 

[mattrox]

Drinking too many beers may cause blindness.

In Australia 'blind drunk' doesn't mean you can't see. It means you are extremely inebriated.

"That bloke at the bar is blind, someone get him a taxi"

It's slang.

 

[mattrox]

Horse Blanket....


Isn't that when Michael Jackson's son loses his voice?

 

[mattrox]

Jeebus, do I have to do everything around here?

Is that showing that the South is stupid?


When we were flying back to Australia after 6 years in California my dad asked the hostess (Aussie airline and hostess) for a Soda....... He got a Soda Water.

Not beer related but funny in retrospect.

 

[mattrox]

It's "pop" around here in Minnesota, and in South Dakota where my parents live. My first job out of college was in downstate Illinois, not far from St. Louis. Everyone said "soda." But 100 miles north, it was "pop." Once I ordered a hot fudge sundae, pronouncing sundae like "Sunday." I was corrected by the waitress. They say SUN-duh. "Missouri" is muh-ZER-uh. Basically, any word that ends with a vowel gets the schwa sound.

In parts of Wisconsin, the drinking fountain is the "bubbler."

/CSB

I spent from '83 to '89 I'm California. When we came back and kids referred to the "bubbler" I was like "WTF are you talking about?"

Drinking fountain FTW.

 

[dkwolf]

Seriously, though, what's with this weird quoting everything you've found from years ago thing you're doing?

Lighten up, Francis. The guy's been a member here less than a month. He found a (really, really, REALLY) long post that interests him, and has been working his way through it.

Sure, reviving a long-dead thread with a new reply is typically bad etiquette. But heck, this thread has no point, has been a convoluted mess (with countless derailments) from the start. So what if a post from 3 years ago gets quoted? This thread has never been "dormant" for more than about a week, so it's not like it's being drug up from the archives of the forum.

Edit: On another forum, we had a name for it. There was a thread (kind of like this one, or the drunken ramblings thread) that would routinely go through 30-40 pages of new posts EVERY DAY. One regular ("Webfoot" is his screen name) would go camping for a weekend, then come back Sunday night and get caught up. Sometimes it was entertaining just reading his posts as he went through the 100+ pages, commenting as he went. Hence, the term (in that group, at least) "Webfooting".

 

[Venari]

Sure, reviving a long-dead thread with a new reply is typically bad etiquette...

But, WHY is that?

So what if a post from 3 years ago gets quoted?

My thoughts exactly.

 

[flars]

Some writings are worth remembering and quoting, like Shakespeare. I don't want to compare this thread with the quality of writing produced by Shakespeare though.

 

[thatjonguy]

Let's get this thing back on track.

How about funny quotes on a beer bottle?

A quote from Vanilla Ice.

View attachment 1448841820780.jpg

 

[n240sxguy]

Is that showing that the South is stupid?





When we were flying back to Australia after 6 years in California my dad asked the hostess (Aussie airline and hostess) for a Soda....... He got a Soda Water.



Not beer related but funny in retrospect.

No, the south is the smartest, and most typical of the bunch. Ever heard of "fedexing" something? That's using the most popular brand as the generic name for the entire industry. How bout xeroxing something. Same thing again. Just google it; there's another one. If you had been in the south for 6 years, he would've asked for a Coke, and gotten something similar to what he intended.

 

[n240sxguy]

Let's get this thing back on track.

How about funny quotes on a beer bottle?

A quote from Vanilla Ice.

Maybe the quote has to do with the passage of time part. Nobody has cared what vanilla ice had to say for a looong time.

 

[mattrox]

No, the south is the smartest, and most typical of the bunch. Ever heard of "fedexing" something? That's using the most popular brand as the generic name for the entire industry. How bout xeroxing something. Same thing again. Just google it; there's another one. If you had been in the south for 6 years, he would've asked for a Coke, and gotten something similar to what he intended.

Completely tongue in cheek.

But it seems an odd that if you want a fizzy drink and there is a grape shasta you've got your eye on, you ask for a cola brand.

 

[philipCT]

Waitress at a restaurant in Newport Rhode Island over the Thanksgiving break - trying to explain an item on the draft list - "Oh, that's a double IPA, it's, like, totally, like really hoppy" while simultaneously and probably unconsciously turning up her nose.
Me: okay, great - I'll have that.

Way to sell that double IPA!

 

[DoD_Ales]

... But heck, this thread has no point ...

Wait, ... What?

 

[hunter_le five]

Can't fault a man for PKUing.

 

[n240sxguy]

Completely tongue in cheek.



But it seems an odd that if you want a fizzy drink and there is a grape shasta you've got your eye on, you ask for a cola brand.

Yeah, it's complete b.s., but true for the most part anyway. I never liked Coke, but it was still the generic reference other than actual order time. I wouldn't be asking for a grape soda anyway. It's been easier since I came of age. Now I just look at the beer menu and forget all the Coke, soda, pop, sparkly beverage crap.